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Let's talk about comments!!!

Sex_on_the_Joe
Joe-D
Fire of Insight
United States 13awards
Joined 18th Sep 2018
Forum Posts: 274

Ahavati said:It's  cut and dry with me: if you ask for honest critique, and I see something that can be improved ( particularly grammar, misspellings, etc. ), I'm going to honor YOUR request, be that an honest critique or friendly comment ( if it so moves me ).

Not to say I empathically haven't provided critiques privately ( such as Luna's above, if I am the one she's referring to ), especially if I feel it might embarrass the poet publicly.

Regardless, dissing the one who took the time to honor your critique is eschewing your own responsibility of asking for it.

Think before you ask, and assume responsibility for your requests.


I have to agree with you there on that note. If you write a piece and put that you want "honest critique" than you have to also accept the fact that honest critique will take many shapes and forms. You are opening yourself up to more than just constructive criticism but also the responsibility for you to accept what ever form of criticism that is dealt. (I'm not saying that you should accept negative, bullying, disrespectful or just "tear down the writer" comments) If the reader may see some detrimental errors or may have a better solution, or format for helping the writer become better than that author needs to remember what they asked for and be acceptful to the readers point of view with an opened mind. A poet who cannot accept these critical offers of opinions need be wary what they ask for. After all how can an inexperienced writer learn if not for a harsh and experienced teacher? It is all about how you take your medicine rather than who is dishing it out.

Sex_on_the_Joe
Joe-D
Fire of Insight
United States 13awards
Joined 18th Sep 2018
Forum Posts: 274

JohnnyBlaze said:

Righteous, Dude.

* slathers Joe with Awesome sauce *



I thought the Napo/WriMo was in April???

Ahavati
Tyrant of Words
United States 116awards
Joined 11th Apr 2015
Forum Posts: 14271

Sex_on_the_Joe said:

I have to agree with you there on that note. If you write a piece and put that you want "honest critique" than you have to also accept the fact that honest critique will take many shapes and forms. You are opening yourself up to more than just constructive criticism but also the responsibility for you to accept what ever form of criticism that is dealt. (I'm not saying that you should accept negative, bullying, disrespectful or just "tear down the writer" comments) If the reader may see some detrimental errors or may have a better solution, or format for helping the writer become better than that author needs to remember what they asked for and be acceptful to the readers point of view with an opened mind. A poet who cannot accept these critical offers of opinions need be wary what they ask for. After all how can an inexperienced writer learn if not for a harsh and experienced teacher? It is all about how you take your medicine rather than who is dishing it out.


Exactly. Believe it or not ( not directed toward you but in general ) there are actually writers here who are not here to socialize**, but to genuinely improve their writing because they're building a portfolio.

** I don't care why anyone is here, be it to socialize, share, improve writing, or whatnot. So don't come at me.

juliagkrimmel
daisygirl
Twisted Dreamer
United States
Joined 18th Feb 2021
Forum Posts: 17

Sex_on_the_Joe said:

I have to agree with you there on that note. If you write a piece and put that you want "honest critique" than you have to also accept the fact that honest critique will take many shapes and forms. You are opening yourself up to more than just constructive criticism but also the responsibility for you to accept what ever form of criticism that is dealt. (I'm not saying that you should accept negative, bullying, disrespectful or just "tear down the writer" comments) If the reader may see some detrimental errors or may have a better solution, or format for helping the writer become better than that author needs to remember what they asked for and be acceptful to the readers point of view with an opened mind. A poet who cannot accept these critical offers of opinions need be wary what they ask for. After all how can an inexperienced writer learn if not for a harsh and experienced teacher? It is all about how you take your medicine rather than who is dishing it out.


yes! there's a difference between honest and constructive criticism and just being harsh or mean. there are ways to help or correct a writer without tearing their poem apart and making them unnecessarily upset

Ahavati
Tyrant of Words
United States 116awards
Joined 11th Apr 2015
Forum Posts: 14271

Sex_on_the_Joe said:

I thought the Napo/WriMo was in April???


Registration is March 01 - 30. T-Minus five days until launch! Team NaPo'21 is downright giddy!

DaisyGrace
Dangerous Mind
United States 17awards
Joined 29th Mar 2017
Forum Posts: 1337

Ahavati said:

Registration is March 01 - 30. T-Minus five days until launch! Team NaPo'21 is downright giddy!


Speak for yourself, A!

I kid. Of course! I seriously love NaPo!

juliagkrimmel
daisygirl
Twisted Dreamer
United States
Joined 18th Feb 2021
Forum Posts: 17

Anonymous said:<< post removed >>

not to be rude or anything of that sorts, but you don't have any poems under your account. i write my soul on the page with every poem, however i want to become better each time i write. i joined the deep to share my poems with people because there isn't anyone else i would feel comfortable sharing them with. this is a community based on meeting other people who enjoy poetry and being able to share your poetry and give and receive feedback. wishing for feedback isn't a bad thing as long as you are giving it too. i'm not sure why you chose to be hostile towards me with your comment when i was simply expressing myself in a totally "relaxed" manner. nevertheless, i hope you enjoy it here as much as i do and chose to be positive towards others :)

Sex_on_the_Joe
Joe-D
Fire of Insight
United States 13awards
Joined 18th Sep 2018
Forum Posts: 274

juliagkrimmel said:

i always crave the validation that comes from comments and as you said it's a tough pill to swallow when your work doesn't get the commentary or recognition you want. i'm always wondering if my poems are even good or if people are just being kind. i wish to be a good poet, but i fear i'm not and i want to get better but without criticism and praise i'm not sure how to improve.


First and foremost; there is no such thing as a bad poem, just an inexperienced poet. Secondly, you should never doubt yourself or the type of poetry you create. This is who you are as a person and an artist. Never second guess or doubt your abilities. You can never please everyone who comes along and reads your works. It is impossible and all you will do is just end up hurting yourself and losing faith in the one thing you are passionate about. It is a sad moment when a poet allows their spirit to be broken over someone else's disapproval. Many will love what you write and many will not, that's the way the cookie crumbles. Don't fret over the ones who don't like or agree with your poems but be overjoyed and compassionate with the ones that do love your works. As long as you have faith and passion and a strong desire to be the best writer you can be than when you really look at it the ones who don't like you really don't matter any more. Members of the Deep will comment soon enough, and when they do it would be wise to take heed to what they have to offer especially if it is for your best interest. As a fellow writer (I'm sure I can speak for many here) we are always our worst critiques. Some poems we may write may not have that feel of completion or "good enough" to post or meet other previous poems written expectations. But you know what, that is just perfect. As long as it comes from your heart with emotion and a burning passion in your soul than it is always a Masterpiece no matter what others may think or perceive. Believe in yourself and your talents and you will be amazed at how far and how much progress you can make. Never stop writing and never allow defeat. Keep an opened heart and an opened mind and the skies are the limit that you will soar with opened arms.

Gahddess_Worship
Osomajestuoso
Tyrant of Words
United States 37awards
Joined 21st Aug 2013
Forum Posts: 796

Comments are like Christmas gifts. I enjoy getting them but even more giving them. Why not validate, in small measure, the work of a fellow poet especially if it compels them to continue writing. I personally am grateful for the feedback be it good or constructive. I unashamedly admit to enjoying very much the comments feature in DUP if used to build and not destroy.

Sex_on_the_Joe
Joe-D
Fire of Insight
United States 13awards
Joined 18th Sep 2018
Forum Posts: 274

DaisyGrace said:a couple of things from my tenure here (which started in 2014 i think so i ain't 'old' but i ain't a newbie):

1. i feel like this conversation comes up once every so often. i'm surprised some of the "old" members haven't commented with how it used to be "back in the day." i think the reason why some of us (me included) have stopped giving 'honest critique' is because we've been burnt  by it. and by burnt, i mean i took a long time to offer suggestions/critique on poems only to have people get BIG mad about it. whatever. people can say what they way back to me, but after multiple, MULTIPLE times of that happening, i just stopped. if i know someone can actually handle some criticism, i'll sometimes offer it up. if i don't, i'll leave a comment if i'm moved to.

but also....

2. who can offer up critique? ANYONE WHO FUCKING WANTS TO. i don't have to tell you my credentials. i come here to be mostly anonymous. so if your argument for not considering/ignoring/bashing on people who offer critique is that you don't know who they are or want to know where their best seller is...well, you do you boo. but you could possibly be passing up on some valuable insight. AND even if a person doesn't have credentials, or a best seller, doesn't meant that they can't tell you what they like or don't like about your piece. readers read what they like. so if you aren't being read, maybe you aren't writing what people want to read. (or you have an attitude and people don't read your pieces because they don't want to deal with you.) writers  become better writers through critiquing/reading/responding to others work. that's just logical.

3. regarding views: when i had my profile and poems visible to members and non members, my views were MUCH higher than they are now that i have my profile set to only be seen by members who are signed in. so it's possible your views are high, but your comments are low, because people can't comment without being a signed in member. and your pieces are possibly being read by anyone who searched for....oh, i don't know....erotic poetry.

4. it comes down to what you want your experience here to be. if you want a social experience, that is valid. if you want a "serious poet looking for serious interactions" that is valid too. If you want a mix of both...make it happen! if you are looking for actual critique, i suggest seeking it out. not just using the 'i want honest critique' function. find writers that you think are great and start getting to know them. form a relationship with them. then ask them personally if they are willing to critique.

5. just be nice.


I couldn't agree with you more. It is truly sad that some writers can't handle a harsh critique. That's just like somebody who wants to play on a basketball team but tells the coach they don't wanna run the drills required and necessary for them to compete. I always ask for honest critique with all my work because I know that there are better writers than me here on the deep. As long as it will help develop and construct certain areas of my pieces than I am always open for suggestions, especially if it is a form or genre that ai am not familiar with. Now on that note of "actively seeking it out" I never explored that option only because of the fact that I don't wanna come off as a stalker or an unwelcomed guest because the person I am in boxing doesn't know me. I kind of keep those in box messages for the people that I trust and know. That would definitely seem creepy and desperate. Lol.....

Ahavati
Tyrant of Words
United States 116awards
Joined 11th Apr 2015
Forum Posts: 14271

DaisyGrace said:

Speak for yourself, A!

I kid. Of course! I seriously love NaPo!


Bwahahahahahaha!

Gahddess_Worship
Osomajestuoso
Tyrant of Words
United States 37awards
Joined 21st Aug 2013
Forum Posts: 796

I don't concern myself with views because it's not clear whether anyone of the readers actually red the piece through to the end, although with Senryu/Haiku one would hope so. When someone comments you can better assume that hey read the entire piece.

juliagkrimmel
daisygirl
Twisted Dreamer
United States
Joined 18th Feb 2021
Forum Posts: 17

Sex_on_the_Joe said:

First and foremost; there is no such thing as a bad poem, just an inexperienced poet. Secondly, you should never doubt yourself or the type of poetry you create. This is who you are as a person and an artist. Never second guess or doubt your abilities. You can never please everyone who comes along and reads your works. It is impossible and all you will do is just end up hurting yourself and losing faith in the one thing you are passionate about. It is a sad moment when a poet allows their spirit to be broken over someone else's disapproval. Many will love what you write and many will not, that's the way the cookie crumbles. Don't fret over the ones who don't like or agree with your poems but be overjoyed and compassionate with the ones that do love your works. As long as you have faith and passion and a strong desire to be the best writer you can be than when you really look at it the ones who don't like you really don't matter any more. Members of the Deep will comment soon enough, and when they do it would be wise to take heed to what they have to offer especially if it is for your best interest. As a fellow writer (I'm sure I can speak for many here) we are always our worst critiques. Some poems we may write may not have that feel of completion or "good enough" to post or meet other previous poems written expectations. But you know what, that is just perfect. As long as it comes from your heart with emotion and a burning passion in your soul than it is always a Masterpiece no matter what others may think or perceive. Believe in yourself and your talents and you will be amazed at how far and how much progress you can make. Never stop writing and never allow defeat. Keep an opened heart and an opened mind and the skies are the limit that you will soar with opened arms.


thank you so much! i have found a lot of lovely people here and amazing comments that have helped me find more and more passion in poetry (if thats even possible lol)

TheOralizer
Tyrant of Words
United States 26awards
Joined 15th Nov 2013
Forum Posts: 106

A grain of sugar can sweeten more than a basket filled with garlic. So with positive comments. Oral

JohnnyBlaze
Tyrant of Words
United States 23awards
Joined 20th Mar 2015
Forum Posts: 5572

Sex_on_the_Joe said:

First and foremost; there is no such thing as a bad poem, just an inexperienced poet. Secondly, you should never doubt yourself or the type of poetry you create. This is who you are as a person and an artist. Never second guess or doubt your abilities. You can never please everyone who comes along and reads your works. It is impossible and all you will do is just end up hurting yourself and losing faith in the one thing you are passionate about. It is a sad moment when a poet allows their spirit to be broken over someone else's disapproval. Many will love what you write and many will not, that's the way the cookie crumbles. Don't fret over the ones who don't like or agree with your poems but be overjoyed and compassionate with the ones that do love your works. As long as you have faith and passion and a strong desire to be the best writer you can be than when you really look at it the ones who don't like you really don't matter any more. Members of the Deep will comment soon enough, and when they do it would be wise to take heed to what they have to offer especially if it is for your best interest. As a fellow writer (I'm sure I can speak for many here) we are always our worst critiques. Some poems we may write may not have that feel of completion or "good enough" to post or meet other previous poems written expectations. But you know what, that is just perfect. As long as it comes from your heart with emotion and a burning passion in your soul than it is always a Masterpiece no matter what others may think or perceive. Believe in yourself and your talents and you will be amazed at how far and how much progress you can make. Never stop writing and never allow defeat. Keep an opened heart and an opened mind and the skies are the limit that you will soar with opened arms.


In bold, truer words have never been said.

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