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Let's talk about comments!!!

Sex_on_the_Joe
Joe-D
Fire of Insight
United States 13awards
Joined 18th Sep 2018
Forum Posts: 274

Comments are the bread and butter of the deep but it seems that most of us don't truly understand this. Comments can either make or break a writer depending on how the comment was made and who it was given by. Comments are the very tool that is used to measure a poets strength and weaknesses. Without this type of critiquing style how are we as a group helping new and old poets grow? Think of comments as the life water returning to the dessert after a long writing drought. You never know how you can inspire and motivate a struggling artist or a shy poet to shed their afraidness and acknowledge themselves as the super star they are. There is no such thing as a bad poem, just an inexperienced writer. We as a group need to recognize the power of commenting. It is such a shame to see some beautiful pieces very well written with more views than there are comments. To me as a writer this is like the equivilancy of witnessing and experiencing a once in a life time moment and not taking a picture or even recognizing it for it's true purpose. How can we as writers just allow these rare and elegant jewels to be washed away? I am quite sure there are a lot of writers within this group who know exactly what I am talking about. (I understand there are a lot of people on this site and many different genres and writers come and go everyday so at that moment our pieces may be easily and quickly over looked. This is not what I'm talking about)

Most of our artists know who I am and I am sure there are many who may also feel the same. This forum is not for any ill willed feelings or back stabbing any poets. This forum is for artists who struggle with this issue and don't know how to positively vent. This issue is driving out new artists and strangling their growth because they feel either inadequate, unworthy, or just not good enough. Help us keep our new talent alive so they don't feel like they are invisible or being ignored.

In this forum I want everyone to feel as comfortable as they can and to express any feelings of abandonment or invisibility due to the lack of commenting.

What makes you as a writer and artist want to comment on pieces?

Is it how they make you feel?
Who the writer is?
How intellectual the piece may be?
How it takes you back to memory lane?
The topic?
The genre?

These questions can go on and on so to spare you and me the boredom I just want to talk about what makes you comment.

Please feel free to participate, after all this is all about empowering and growing our inner poets into their true potential.

I'm very interested in what you have to say. Until then.

Sex_on_the_Joe
Joe-D
Fire of Insight
United States 13awards
Joined 18th Sep 2018
Forum Posts: 274

Anonymous said:<< post removed >>

I agree with what you are saying. Sometimes the commenting can be very biast, self absorbed and even hypocritical at times. These kinds of comments are also a big issue for fellow writers but I think these kind of comments are for a whole different forum all together because these types of comments cause negative friction between other artists. I want to keep this forum as friendly and comfortable as possible. I too as a writer do not care for comments or likes because I have way too much faith and self esteem in the pieces that I create. But on the other hand it is also a little disconcerning to see such hard work and persevence put into a piece to just not get anything at all. Positive commenting may just be that glue needed to keep inexperienced or new writers inspired or motivated to want to continue their poetry. For me it is not a factor that will sway or force me to want to leave. I share my pieces because there might be someone out there who may just need a little push or who may feel like they are the only one who may be dealing with certain issues by themselves. I thank you Ricky-Journals for kicking off this forum.

Northern_Soul
-Missy-
Tyrant of Words
England 32awards
Joined 10th Jan 2021
Forum Posts: 5662

I have a friend of mine over on Facebook who always used to go mad at me when I made comments about the punctuation or a misspelling or something else to do with the form. It took me years to understand why it used to irk him so much.

I've been that type of commenter. I am not anymore.

It wasn't until years later when my view changed and I realised how he felt. I thought about the poem. What it means to create poetry. What it means to pour your heart and your soul and your truth out on to the page... and I realised to only comment on the structure and form and spelling is a bit of a disservice to the passion and the emotion that went into creating it. These days I always try and keep that first and foremost in my mind.

I compared that to real life - imagine a person was standing in front of you, pouring their heart and their soul and their gut out before you, only to have you stand there and pick on their grammar or their form or whether a full stop is in the right place. To pick apart something that is personal to the writer is, in my humble opinion, wrong.... and deflating, if I'm perfectly honest.

I personally think there should be a third critique option here on the DU. Friendly feedback, honest thoughts, and detailed critique. This is so a person can opt into that detailed kind of critique if they want it (and of course... some people here do want that -- I'm not denying that) but a person doesn't have to be belittled by having their work torn apart by grammar vultures when they're trying to tell their story.

What draws me to comment on a piece is how much it made me feel, and I am totally guilty of going off on long tangents in comments when explaining how a poem touched me, or a memory that it evoked or how it made me feel. Because that's the essence of art isn't it? To evoke a response in the voyeur of the art, whether it's a poem or a painting or anything in between.

It's very hard to keep everyone happy.

Write the kind of comments you would like to receive. That's the best advice I could give from my time here.


JohnnyBlaze
Tyrant of Words
United States 23awards
Joined 20th Mar 2015
Forum Posts: 5573

Firstly, a few things.

Views are not entirely indicative of real people reading your poems. Some views come from Search Engine Bots returning to index every page of a website on a daily to weekly basis.

If you are a newcomer, don't blast all of your poems through the Submittal process as fast as possible. When people are actually following you and you pace yourself, your poems are less likely to go by unseen.

The more you comment on the poems of others, the more likely you will receive comments on your poems from others. Therefore, if you find yourself insisting you don't have time to comment, then make time to do so.

Use as many themes as you can that apply to your particular poem so that it will turn up in searches.

Specify in your profile the kind of comments you are appreciative of.

====================

I personally enjoy helping others improve their poems and it helps me become a better writer in the process. Most poems can be improved in some fashion, even those of established poets already published.

The analysis that goes into critique is more time and energy consuming than providing friendly feedback, so I tend to reserve my more intense comments for those that actually request such and are less likely to ignore it. Therefore, I'm less inclined to surf through the latest poems and I leave fewer comments than I could.

And regardless of what kind of feedback you were asking for, if I leave a simple observation with a suggestion that is met with a conniption fit, I'll never bother with your poetry ever again. There are plenty of fish in this particular sea.

As a reminder, registration for NapoWriMo 2021 begins in less than a week! Look no further for a 30 day challenge in an atmosphere of positivity and encouragement.

https://deepundergroundpoetry.com/poetry-writing-month/  


Sex_on_the_Joe
Joe-D
Fire of Insight
United States 13awards
Joined 18th Sep 2018
Forum Posts: 274

Anonymous said:<< post removed >>

Some pieces that have a diplomatic feel or powerful truth behind their purpose I feel are the most controversial pieces. These poems may not have been written to be viewed as a negative status but maybe more on the contrary side of personal beliefs and feelings. In my opinion these pieces do not deserve negative feedback. I think it is wrong to tell somebody how they should feel about a topic that may be consequentially the reason behind their motives to write about it. My mother always told me that if you have nothing nice to say about a person or anything else that you may come across in life that it is better not to say anything at all. This is what makes controversial poetry so deadly and yet so powerful. People will always have their own opinions about these pieces. With that being said I believe that the writer who has written these pieces should be acceptable and open minded to the different reactions received from different individuals. If a writer feels that strongly about the topic then they can always opt out to having any comments made to their pieces.

LunaGreyhawk
Dangerous Mind
United States 17awards
Joined 8th July 2019
Forum Posts: 880

As far as receiving comments, I enjoy knowing that something I poured my soul into found kindred suffering/joy/humor in the other writers here.  I also have no formal training, unless you count the creative writing classes I took in college many moons ago, so I haven’t studied forms and perspectives the way some here have.  I tend to just try my hand at various poetic forms as I have the time and opportunity to see if I can speak from another perspective or delve into a subject that I wouldn’t otherwise write about.  I sometimes fail horribly and I find I am thankful when no one points this out lol.

I’ll also add that some of the most helpful critique I’ve ever gotten here has been sent through my inbox and was kept out of the eye of the general public.  It was a kindness, and it allowed me to really consider the critic’s suggestions without first feeling defensive about having that conversation in front of my peers.  I don’t always make changes to my poetry based on critique unless it’s a glaring grammatical or punctuation error.  Sometimes it comes down to knowing that following the suggestion(s) would make the poem closer to “correct” for its chosen form and more likely to be read and understood by the masses, and still choosing to keep it the way it is anyway.  

I want to be a really good writer, so I appreciate it whenever someone gives me honest critique.  If I didn’t care about evolving and learning, I wouldn’t bother sharing my poetry at all.  Poetry is a bit of a vulnerability gamble when tacking it up in a public forum.   As everyone here has probably experienced at some point, it stings a bit to have someone miss the message you attempted to deliver in order to give you a rundown of your misuse of grammar or form, and my insecurity often wants to ask, “ok, but what did you think of my poem?” lol.  But in the end, I can’t become a good writer if I close myself off to opportunities to grow.  Not everything I write is going to be top-shelf, and that’s a fact for all of us.  Bottom line is that I appreciate critique when it is given and I try not to ever get so attached to a thing I created that I can’t accept it could use some work to make it better.  

As for making comments, oof this is a tough one.  I tend to only comment when I find resonance in another poet’s words.  I struggle with finding new ways to say, “this really moved me”.  Sometimes, the meaning of a poem passes right over my head, but the emotion it leaves behind sticks with me, or the way the poet played with his/her/their words paints a stunning landscape in my synesthesia, and I’m at a loss for how to convey that.  I am guilty of RL’ing poetry that I loved but couldn’t find words for.  But, since I know how good it feels to receive that confirmation that something you wrote met with someone who appreciated it, I keep trying.  


TheOralizer
Tyrant of Words
United States 26awards
Joined 15th Nov 2013
Forum Posts: 106

I try to remember that opinions are like noses, no two or the same and we "blow them sometimes."

Sex_on_the_Joe
Joe-D
Fire of Insight
United States 13awards
Joined 18th Sep 2018
Forum Posts: 274

Northern_Soul said:I have a friend of mine over on Facebook who always used to go mad at me when I made comments about the punctuation or a misspelling or something else to do with the form. It took me years to understand why it used to irk him so much.

I've been that type of commenter. I am not anymore.

It wasn't until years later when my view changed and I realised how he felt. I thought about the poem. What it means to create poetry. What it means to pour your heart and your soul and your truth out on to the page... and I realised to only comment on the structure and form and spelling is a bit of a disservice to the passion and the emotion that went into creating it. These days I always try and keep that first and foremost in my mind.

I compared that to real life - imagine a person was standing in front of you, pouring their heart and their soul and their gut out before you, only to have you stand there and pick on their grammar or their form or whether a full stop is in the right place. To pick apart something that is personal to the writer is, in my humble opinion, wrong.... and deflating, if I'm perfectly honest.

I personally think there should be a third critique option here on the DU. Friendly feedback, honest thoughts, and detailed critique. This is so a person can opt into that detailed kind of critique if they want it (and of course... some people here do want that -- I'm not denying that) but a person doesn't have to be belittled by having their work torn apart by grammar vultures when they're trying to tell their story.

What draws me to comment on a piece is how much it made me feel, and I am totally guilty of going off on long tangents in comments when explaining how a poem touched me, or a memory that it evoked or how it made me feel. Because that's the essence of art isn't it? To evoke a response in the voyeur of the art, whether it's a poem or a painting or anything in between.

It's very hard to keep everyone happy.

Write the kind of comments you would like to receive. That's the best advice I could give from my time here.



Whenever I read a piece and attempt to leave a comment I do not look for grammatical errors or misspellings in the piece, (this is usually overlooked sometimes by the speed in which the author wrote it and posted. we are all human and these sometimes are just typical typos and mistakes) I look for the depth, the spirit, the emotions and the passion that was used to create the voice of the piece. More often than not I find the more advanced forms  of poetry that are so far above my interpretations that I truly struggle with the ideas and thoughts to even leave a comment. Whenever I do find these gems I still at least try to leave a footnote that I was one of their readers. Commenting is very difficult and can be viewed as intimidating especially when I cannot understand what the poem is about. Sometimes poetry can not be easily interpreted. In my opinion, there is a very thin line between honest critiquing and constructive criticism. Sometimes we as poets want to know exactly how good our material is but are not ready for the harsh criticism of our commentators. I believe commenting should come from the writer's emotional point of view rather than how great their form or grammar is.

Ahavati
Tyrant of Words
United States 116awards
Joined 11th Apr 2015
Forum Posts: 14529

It's  cut and dry with me: if you ask for honest critique, and I see something that can be improved ( particularly grammar, misspellings, etc. ), I'm going to honor YOUR request, be that an honest critique or friendly comment ( if it so moves me ).

Not to say I empathically haven't provided critiques privately ( such as Luna's above, if I am the one she's referring to ), especially if I feel it might embarrass the poet publicly.

Regardless, dissing the one who took the time to honor your critique is eschewing your own responsibility of asking for it.

Think before you ask, and assume responsibility for your requests.

poet Anonymous

I comment to hopefully make a difference by leaving my "footprints" upon a solicited for piece of poetry. There's a reason why you can select 'no comments' and that's completely understandable. I never question anyone's set preferences for their wanted feedback.

Feedback in friendly or of honest critiques are optional to add as a choice upon your individual page. Available as a selection, in my opinion, in hopes, that we'll grow as a writers and perhaps personally from another's input, point of view or someone's ability to reach in and touch us in a way we hadn't been previously, with possible astute and eloquently stated observations. I believe comments connect us together in a way that's important for self reflection, writing development, hilarity, and resonation. (and so many many more reasons, too, I suspect)

Personally, I write comments for as many poems as I can, because I feel it's important. If I'm moved emotionally or impacted in any way by a writer, I leave comments for them of my explanations. I like to think that it's helpful, maybe of some use to them and my hope is, even enjoyed. I too, think "How would I want feedback to appear on my own page?" and I go from there with whatever personal insight I can rightly covey.

I do try to focus on new members and perhaps poems that aren't read as much. I even work on that reading challenge as well.
It's beneficial for me to discover new styles, thoughts, ideas and opinions that I normally wouldn't come across.

I don't look at leaving comments /feedback as just structure enhancing, it's morale boosting and community building, in my humble opinion.
🌹

TheOralizer
Tyrant of Words
United States 26awards
Joined 15th Nov 2013
Forum Posts: 106

I agree 101% with your observation which helps me adjust my attitude, :)

Sex_on_the_Joe
Joe-D
Fire of Insight
United States 13awards
Joined 18th Sep 2018
Forum Posts: 274

JohnnyBlaze said:Firstly, a few things.

Views are not entirely indicative of real people reading your poems. Some views come from Search Engine Bots returning to index every page of a website on a daily to weekly basis.

If you are a newcomer, don't blast all of your poems through the Submittal process as fast as possible. When people are actually following you and you pace yourself, your poems are less likely to go by unseen.

The more you comment on the poems of others, the more likely you will receive comments on your poems from others. Therefore, if you find yourself insisting you don't have time to comment, then make time to do so.

Use as many themes as you can that apply to your particular poem so that it will turn up in searches.

Specify in your profile the kind of comments you are appreciative of.

====================

I personally enjoy helping others improve their poems and it helps me become a better writer in the process. Most poems can be improved in some fashion, even those of established poets already published.

The analysis that goes into critique is more time and energy consuming than providing friendly feedback, so I tend to reserve my more intense comments for those that actually request such and are less likely to ignore it. Therefore, I'm less inclined to surf through the latest poems and I leave fewer comments than I could.

And regardless of what kind of feedback you were asking for, if I leave a simple observation with a suggestion that is met with a conniption fit, I'll never bother with your poetry ever again. There are plenty of fish in this particular sea.

As a reminder, registration for NapoWriMo 2021 begins in less than a week! Look no further for a 30 day challenge in an atmosphere of positivity and encouragement.

https://deepundergroundpoetry.com/poetry-writing-month/  



Thank you JohhnyBlaze for summing up this little bit of info that even I wasn't aware of. Although the algorithms used to specifically pick out a poem by the theme doesn't really seem to explain all the views of a particular piece being seen by a member of the dup verses the comments left behind. Would it be a terrible suggestion to let the author/writer know how many members have at least seen their piece? Maybe if we can see that our works have been viewed by actual members than maybe the ideas of wanting or needing a piece to be commented on can be more easily swallowed.
I will be attending this years Napo/WriMo event as well.

JohnnyBlaze
Tyrant of Words
United States 23awards
Joined 20th Mar 2015
Forum Posts: 5573

Sex_on_the_Joe said:

Thank you JohhnyBlaze for summing up this little bit of info that even I wasn't aware of. Although the algorithms used to specifically pick out a poem by the theme doesn't really seem to explain all the views of a particular piece being seen by a member of the dup verses the comments left behind. Would it be a terrible suggestion to let the author/writer know how many members have at least seen their piece? Maybe if we can see that our works have been viewed by actual members than maybe the ideas of wanting or needing a piece to be commented on can be more easily swallowed.

I will be attending this years Napo/WriMo event as well.


Righteous, Dude.

* slathers Joe with Awesome sauce *


Sex_on_the_Joe
Joe-D
Fire of Insight
United States 13awards
Joined 18th Sep 2018
Forum Posts: 274

LunaGreyhawk said:As far as receiving comments, I enjoy knowing that something I poured my soul into found kindred suffering/joy/humor in the other writers here.  I also have no formal training, unless you count the creative writing classes I took in college many moons ago, so I haven’t studied forms and perspectives the way some here have.  I tend to just try my hand at various poetic forms as I have the time and opportunity to see if I can speak from another perspective or delve into a subject that I wouldn’t otherwise write about.  I sometimes fail horribly and I find I am thankful when no one points this out lol.

I’ll also add that some of the most helpful critique I’ve ever gotten here has been sent through my inbox and was kept out of the eye of the general public.  It was a kindness, and it allowed me to really consider the critic’s suggestions without first feeling defensive about having that conversation in front of my peers.  I don’t always make changes to my poetry based on critique unless it’s a glaring grammatical or punctuation error.  Sometimes it comes down to knowing that following the suggestion(s) would make the poem closer to “correct” for its chosen form and more likely to be read and understood by the masses, and still choosing to keep it the way it is anyway.  

I want to be a really good writer, so I appreciate it whenever someone gives me honest critique.  If I didn’t care about evolving and learning, I wouldn’t bother sharing my poetry at all.  Poetry is a bit of a vulnerability gamble when tacking it up in a public forum.   As everyone here has probably experienced at some point, it stings a bit to have someone miss the message you attempted to deliver in order to give you a rundown of your misuse of grammar or form, and my insecurity often wants to ask, “ok, but what did you think of my poem?” lol.  But in the end, I can’t become a good writer if I close myself off to opportunities to grow.  Not everything I write is going to be top-shelf, and that’s a fact for all of us.  Bottom line is that I appreciate critique when it is given and I try not to ever get so attached to a thing I created that I can’t accept it could use some work to make it better.  

As for making comments, oof this is a tough one.  I tend to only comment when I find resonance in another poet’s words.  I struggle with finding new ways to say, “this really moved me”.  Sometimes, the meaning of a poem passes right over my head, but the emotion it leaves behind sticks with me, or the way the poet played with his/her/their words paints a stunning landscape in my synesthesia, and I’m at a loss for how to convey that.  I am guilty of RL’ing poetry that I loved but couldn’t find words for.  But, since I know how good it feels to receive that confirmation that something you wrote met with someone who appreciated it, I keep trying.  



When I first started out with DUP I had a hard time swallowing the fact that some of my pieces just wouldn't get commented on. This made me feel some type of way. It made me feel like I wasn't good enough or my pieces were just too elaborate for most readers to understand. I did feel invisible and overlooked sometimes. I felt like some of my best pieces were just tossed aside and weren't even given the proper attention. These feelings passed by the way as I became more knowledgeable and comfortable with the whole comment schemes. With this being said I never allowed it to deter me from sharing my personal feelings and point of views. When the comments did come I felt more relieved, more respected and more welcomed as a member. It is very hard to give birth to a poem that you want and crave commentary on and know the fact that the comments will never weigh the same as the views or likes received. Knowing this made me even more determined to write more and share more without the need for commentary to objectify my pieces. I guess I became a stronger and more motivated writer than when I first started. But I believe that there are writers (especially the new members) who need these comments to either improve their art or believe more in themselves as poets.

juliagkrimmel
daisygirl
Twisted Dreamer
United States
Joined 18th Feb 2021
Forum Posts: 17

Sex_on_the_Joe said:

When I first started out with DUP I had a hard time swallowing the fact that some of my pieces just wouldn't get commented on. This made me feel some type of way. It made me feel like I wasn't good enough or my pieces were just too elaborate for most readers to understand. I did feel invisible and overlooked sometimes. I felt like some of my best pieces were just tossed aside and weren't even given the proper attention. These feelings passed by the way as I became more knowledgeable and comfortable with the whole comment schemes. With this being said I never allowed it to deter me from sharing my personal feelings and point of views. When the comments did come I felt more relieved, more respected and more welcomed as a member. It is very hard to give birth to a poem that you want and crave commentary on and know the fact that the comments will never weigh the same as the views or likes received. Knowing this made me even more determined to write more and share more without the need for commentary to objectify my pieces. I guess I became a stronger and more motivated writer than when I first started. But I believe that there are writers (especially the new members) who need these comments to either improve their art or believe more in themselves as poets.


i always crave the validation that comes from comments and as you said it's a tough pill to swallow when your work doesn't get the commentary or recognition you want. i'm always wondering if my poems are even good or if people are just being kind. i wish to be a good poet, but i fear i'm not and i want to get better but without criticism and praise i'm not sure how to improve.

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