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Something fishy on DU

ImperfectedStone
The Gardener
Tyrant of Words
United Kingdom 28awards
Joined 10th Oct 2010
Forum Posts: 1347

He's said he'll ban Missy for a month, what more do you want? She's imperfect, as are you all. It's the same as Sky, you've provided proof so it's happening. Do I think it should, probably not since people can just come back with alternate accounts more toxic and irritated than before? Do I think we should show some bloody understanding, part ways, block and wrath it out with the written word til one feels better? Yes. Why else are we here if not to work through our emotional word vomit, sometimes that will spill over into members here, it's part of it feeling like home.

So I ask will it happen for the other poem writer on here who felt the need to retaliate? I doubt it. Would I want it to? No, I think it's all out of hand. I think names should not be brought into any public poems and should be auto taken down like Facebook, no ban, no report card just this does not meet guidelines, you've used another poets name, this poem has been deleted, simple. If you can't be subtle with your rage that's on you. Heck knows in the last few months a member here and I have referred to each other as birds, fools, rotten trees. Is it immature? Yes. Will we ever be friends? No. Does that mean we can't coexist here? Likely not but that's my issue.

So if we're going to carry on with this block a member for dragging people through the muck in explicit writing when will the private messages I provided detailing many writer's histories be dealt with? I've asked a few times, I even offered my password so they could see both sides without tampering? Because heck knows NO ONE here is a Saint.

I take great offence to this public muck throwing on Deep, there was a time we were better than this. I'm sure I'll be jumped on for this, have it picked apart like a bunch of coyotes, I once loved it here, I loved the people, I loved the way we were a city of angered, sensitive, queer folk. It seems that's dead now and it's a damned shame.

MadameLavender
Guardian of Shadows
United States 87awards
Joined 17th Feb 2013
Forum Posts: 5598

Just to clarify, Sky was banned (3 times), for attacking more people than just Missy--The entire mod staff, as well as Ahavati and Johnny, were on the receiving end, and others as well, since March of this year.  That's 6 months of ongoing issues.  Yes, Missy has RESPONDED to accusations and attacks at times, but she certainly wasn't STARTING conspiracy theories and stumping for anarchy, as was the original member in question per the topic of this thread.  

Let's keep the perspective here, before more fingers get pointed.  

Valeriyabeyond
Dhyana
Dangerous Mind
3awards
Joined 3rd May 2020
Forum Posts: 2668

ImperfectedStone said:He's said he'll ban Missy for a month, what more do you want? She's imperfect, as are you all. It's the same as Sky, you've provided proof so it's happening. Do I think it should, probably not since people can just come back with alternate accounts more toxic and irritated than before? Do I think we should show some bloody understanding, part ways, block and wrath it out with the written word til one feels better? Yes. Why else are we here if not to work through our emotional word vomit, sometimes that will spill over into members here, it's part of it feeling like home.

So I ask will it happen for the other poem writer on here who felt the need to retaliate? I doubt it. Would I want it to? No, I think it's all out of hand. I think names should not be brought into any public poems and should be auto taken down like Facebook, no ban, no report card just this does not meet guidelines, you've used another poets name, this poem has been deleted, simple. If you can't be subtle with your rage that's on you. Heck knows in the last few months a member here and I have referred to each other as birds, fools, rotten trees. Is it immature? Yes. Will we ever be friends? No. Does that mean we can't coexist here? Likely not but that's my issue.

So if we're going to carry on with this block a member for dragging people through the muck in explicit writing when will the private messages I provided detailing many writer's histories be dealt with? I've asked a few times, I even offered my password so they could see both sides without tampering? Because heck knows NO ONE here is a Saint.

I take great offence to this public muck throwing on Deep, there was a time we were better than this. I'm sure I'll be jumped on for this, have it picked apart like a bunch of coyotes, I once loved it here, I loved the people, I loved the way we were a city of angered, sensitive, queer folk. It seems that's dead now and it's a damned shame.


I would have to rally on your side when it comes to dealing with the violating of policy or guidelines . As I have mentioned two or three times in this thread the action needs to be as immediate as possible
No questions or retaliation it's simply cut and dry you are either in violation or your not
The guidelines as ML mentioned are not all in writing it's at the discretion of the WebMiss that is a cop out on the side of DUP We know as adults when we cross the line
There are ways to filter block or ban on admins side without public ridicule, shaming or criticism

Ahavati
Tyrant of Words
United States 116awards
Joined 11th Apr 2015
Forum Posts: 14587

MadameLavender said:Just to clarify, Sky was banned (3 times), for attacking more people than just Missy--The entire mod staff, as well as Ahavati and Johnny, were on the receiving end, and others as well, since March of this year.  That's 6 months of ongoing issues.  Yes, Missy has RESPONDED to accusations and attacks at times, but she certainly wasn't STARTING conspiracy theories and stumping for anarchy, as was the original member in question per the topic of this thread.  

Let's keep the perspective here, before more fingers get pointed.  


Madame, I appreciate that perspective. And I defended Missy when she was attacked, because I don't believe in personal attacks against anyone. And I'm certainly not going to support them even if they're against a member that I don't particularly care for. However, just for clarification, she certainly has attacked others, and been warned multiple times in the past.

My main concern in this was Brenda's feelings. She was called "fucking stupid" and more. She, too, is dealing with mental illness. Her feelings needed to be addressed, not swiped aside and her being told to "grow up" by a moderator. Every member here should feel their concerns are valid. And I know you feel that way too.

Had her concerns been addressed immediately, even privately, none of this would've happened. All she wanted and needed was to feel heard and understood. That's all.



MadameLavender
Guardian of Shadows
United States 87awards
Joined 17th Feb 2013
Forum Posts: 5598

Valeriyabeyond said:

We know as adults when we cross the line




Most of us, yes, but unfortunately there are those who think the rules, whether written and/or unwritten, don't apply to them, and will cross the line because they feel entitled to.


Valeriyabeyond said:


There are ways to filter block or ban on admins side without public ridicule, shaming or criticism


And that's what we've done, originally--enacted the corrective action without announcing it.  It's been "announced" or addressed publicly, in order to clarify concerns of certain members who felt it necessary to make a spectacle of the whole thing by starting this thread.

Josh
Joshua Bond
Tyrant of Words
Palestine 40awards
Joined 2nd Feb 2017
Forum Posts: 1742

I obviously have not the faintest idea what's going on (and I don't want to know any more) despite reading this forum from beginning to end.
I take things at face value and my comment (p.11) was merely trying to point out that if the politics of any organisation puts off new members, then that does not augur well for the long-term health of an organisation.
I shall steer clear of forums in future, apart from the "things you've made" forum which is much more interesting than this type of stuff.

MadameLavender
Guardian of Shadows
United States 87awards
Joined 17th Feb 2013
Forum Posts: 5598

Ahavati said:

Madame, I appreciate that perspective. And I defended Missy when she was attacked, because I don't believe in personal attacks against anyone. And I'm certainly not going to support them even if they're against a member that I don't particularly care for.

My main concern in this was Brenda's feelings. They needed to be addressed, not swiped aside and her being told to "grow up" by a moderator. Every member here should feel their concerns are valid. And I know you feel that way too.

Had her concerns been addressed immediately, even privately, none of this would've happened. All she wanted and needed was to feel heard and understood. That's all.


I agree with that, but again, for perspective's sake, and if we want to go so far as to say "staying on topic" in the thread, this has gone from clarifying the Sky situation, to bringing Missy into it as being guilty of infractions equal to those of Sky, with Crim as the victim, which was clearly not the original train of discourse in this thread.

None of us are perfect, and  we have addressed the original issue and clarified it to those inquiring.

I agree too, that everyone needs to be heard and have their concerns addressed, and if anyone feels as if I have been part of the brush off, then I will say that it's because I do not address DUP issues that are sent to me via my personal Facebook account, as has been the case of a few occasions of late.    I am more than happy to assist here, but it stays here.  The report button must be used, send concerns via "help/ask a question", but when it spills over into non-DUP life, then it's out of control and no, I will not be responding to Facebook contact for issues here.

poet Anonymous

My eyes are so being opened right now. It’s unreal.

Ahavati
Tyrant of Words
United States 116awards
Joined 11th Apr 2015
Forum Posts: 14587

MadameLavender said:

I agree with that, but again, for perspective's sake, and if we want to go so far as to say "staying on topic" in the thread, this has gone from clarifying the Sky situation, to bringing Missy into it as being guilty of infractions equal to those of Sky, with Crim as the victim, which was clearly not the original train of discourse in this thread.

None of us are perfect, and  we have addressed the original issue and clarified it to those inquiring.

I agree too, that everyone needs to be heard and have their concerns addressed, and if anyone feels as if I have been part of the brush off, then I will say that it's because I do not address DUP issues that are sent to me via my personal Facebook account, as has been the case of a few occasions of late.    I am more than happy to assist here, but it stays here.  The report button must be used, send concerns via "help/ask a question", but when it spills over into non-DUP life, then it's out of control and no, I will not be responding to Facebook contact for issues here.


Point taken with the topic; and, in all fairness, I edited my post before you replied.

Perhaps you can speak with Brenda privately and smooth over the brush-off. She did not deserve that.

lepperochan
Craic-Dealer
Guardian of Shadows
Palestine 67awards
Joined 1st Apr 2011
Forum Posts: 14457

Ok.

so, when you titled one if your poems "***** you cunt" or words to that effect I should have banned you rather than ask you nicely to remove it.  you're no stranger to taking shots st people in your poetry so please dont go on like the virgin mary

Missy didnt earn herself a ban. sure, it was a bit rough. she did ask you to leave her alone twice.

you're not a victim here. my friends wouldnt ask or expect me to take sides. like I said, grow up


Missy is gone, Ethan is gone, Umm is gone, the podcast is gone  I would suggest you stop going on like a needy princess.

crimsin
Unveiling
Tyrant of Words
United States 121awards
Joined 25th Jan 2011
Forum Posts: 2636

I was really sick when I wrote that title and I apologized directly to Shadow many times for it and just for the record it wasn't that bad... I would have accepted Missy's apology as well but none came...I'm no needy princess Eamonn...for the record I tried to communicate with you about my concerns when Missy started taking shots at me I did so privately...you didn't respond and now you're doing it publically.

Viddax
Lord Viddax
Guardian of Shadows
United Kingdom 31awards
Joined 10th Oct 2009
Forum Posts: 6694

Ahavati
- It is likely I knew but was not fully aware of the situation or the impact. A way/form for Mods to know clearly what is going on seems to be in order.

Sibyl
- I will miss your departure; another piece of DU to break away and be lost to the tide never to be reclaimed and treasured again.

drone
- I intend to start a process that clears up wording and behaviour so that any loopholes are eliminated. So that it is clear and understandable to anyone and everyone; to prevent any bullshit from happening because people played fast and loose with words/rules.

Valeriya
- There seems to be a global mistrust of authority at the moment; Mod integrity and presentation could definitely be improved upon. 'Who watches the watchers?'
- Methods and tools for mods could definitely be improved: long term and short term ideas would be welcomed in a private/mod email due to the sensitive nature. (Can't have people know what spells and magic we use for them to then exploit)

Josh
- It is disheartening to hear that; the forums are by no means great at the moment. The plan is not to return peace and order in some clinical robotic way: but to make it more human - methods pending.


All

- I intend to open up threads on the discussion of behaviour and responsibilities; to then shape policy that will be universal. With the 'good' and 'bad' utterly clear. The internet has no rules of conduct; there will be something along those lines for DU.

- Given the current situation it seems it will not be resolved to everyone's satisfaction. The storm has hit and passed: now it is about picking up the pieces and ensuring things are in place to prevent the next storm.

- DU has always allowed some sense of free speech and free thought; at the end of the day DU has not forced people to write specific words at gunpoint. However, any feelings of repressed speech must be acknowledged. Hopefully having new threads about this will be a step in the right direction.

- Be human, be nice. Life, reality, the world, are full of enough bullshit and bad: do good if and where you can.

- Cliques, teams, groups, crowds etc.
Personally I am and always will be an individual outsider: this is handy when compared to problems of 'thems' and 'us' when I am busy with 'what am I?' Groups and factions appear to be a problem: the answer is not to break these factions but diplomacy through messaging the Mods. If people have to avoid each other then that is 1 answer, but one I do not like. Further discussion is needed on this.

crimsin
Unveiling
Tyrant of Words
United States 121awards
Joined 25th Jan 2011
Forum Posts: 2636

All

- I intend to open up threads on the discussion of behaviour and responsibilities; to then shape policy that will be universal. With the 'good' and 'bad' utterly clear. The internet has no rules of conduct; there will be something along those lines for DU.

- Given the current situation it seems it will not be resolved to everyone's satisfaction. The storm has hit and passed: now it is about picking up the pieces and ensuring things are in place to prevent the next storm.

- DU has always allowed some sense of free speech and free thought; at the end of the day DU has not forced people to write specific words at gunpoint. However, any feelings of repressed speech must be acknowledged. Hopefully having new threads about this will be a step in the right direction.

- Be human, be nice. Life, reality, the world, are full of enough bullshit and bad: do good if and where you can.

- Cliques, teams, groups, crowds etc.
Personally I am and always will be an individual outsider: this is handy when compared to problems of 'thems' and 'us' when I am busy with 'what am I?' Groups and factions appear to be a problem: the answer is not to break these factions but diplomacy through messaging the Mods. If people have to avoid each other then that is 1 answer, but one I do not like. Further discussion is needed on this.

thank you dearest Viddax I'm actually really sorry this all happened...when I started to feel frustrated I reached out to a mod and didn't get an answer and things quickly escalted...I don't know what the answer is exactly but people need to be treated with some decency even if there are personal dislikes...I was geniunie with my query over Daniel's win with love in my heart... how it got so out of control i'm unsure...I think egos get in the way personally...

lepperochan
Craic-Dealer
Guardian of Shadows
Palestine 67awards
Joined 1st Apr 2011
Forum Posts: 14457

I'm trying to point out that everyone gets a small bit of leeway depending on circumstances. you did, and many others too. this is not about us and you, or me and you, or you and them

this is about making decisions based on what's in front of us. you felt Missy should have been  banned because the way she spoke to you., I get that.  theres no room for me to take sides here.  didnt speak to Missy privately about it either.

it's TRUE your not a trouble maker, and probably not a needy princess. your sence of justice appears to be a bit "burn the witch" to me. I understand you felt unattended, and I do opologize for the lack of communication. this is transparency


let's move on from this. possitive vibrations





crimsin
Unveiling
Tyrant of Words
United States 121awards
Joined 25th Jan 2011
Forum Posts: 2636

lepperochan said:I'm trying to point out that everyone gets a small bit of leeway depending on circumstances. you did, and many others too. this is not about us and you, or me and you, or you and them

this is about making decisions based on what's in front of us. you felt Missy should have been  banned because the way she spoke to you., I get that.  theres no room for me to take sides here.  didnt speak to Missy privately about it either.

it's TRUE your not a trouble maker, and probably not a needy princess. your sence of justice appears to be a bit "burn the witch" to me. I understand you felt unattended, and I do opologize for the lack of communication. this is transparency


let's move on from this. possitive vibrations






I don't feel that way towards Missy Eamonn if I didn't care for her in some manner my feelings wouldn't be that hurt...things got out of control... you know I still care I feel truly sad... I don't want you guys to stop doing what you love...not because of me... I had no hidden agenda when I asked about Daniel's win I just wanted to know...

we will carry on...

I quite consider this a family a crazy perhaps but one none the less...

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