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Expel Specious Dialogue

Bluevelvete
Bluevelvete
Dangerous Mind
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Ingredients said:

I'm a lover and a fighter. That just makes me Lighter.


🥊 💜 🌬️🌠🍃

(Kid gloves with me please )

Back to dark poetry!!
🖤
🌹
🖤
🌹
🖤

Ingredients
Ingredients
Twisted Dreamer
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Bluevelvete said:

🥊 💜 🌬️🌠🍃

(Kid gloves with me please )

Back to dark poetry!!
🖤
🌹
🖤
🌹
🖤


I'll just pretend to understand what all those emoji's mean.....

Ingredients
Ingredients
Twisted Dreamer
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Confusions Tomb

Investigate, interrogate, the inner self, and plea.
Imagine that, determination, with self-control, is free.
You need to know the answers to...
You need to see the suspects who...
Will help you sort out confusions tomb, or buried you will be.

I can't actually link my new poems. (Not that I really know how to. But this is one that will go up eventually.)

Bluevelvete
Bluevelvete
Dangerous Mind
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Ingredients said:

I'll just pretend to understand what all those emoji's mean.....


My whimsy is endearing....
Lmao
apparently only to myself.
although I'm still giggling at that response
haha

fighter, lover, and a weirdo attempt at 'lighter'
I'm limited in my emoji cute whimsy

Bluevelvete
Bluevelvete
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whimsy shines
winning the dark's devine
insightful pride
became
her truest guide
to peel back the
facade
revealing all the odd
under skins
of those biggest grins

Ingredients
Ingredients
Twisted Dreamer
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Bluevelvete said:

My whimsy is endearing....
Lmao
apparently only to myself.
although I'm still giggling at that response
haha

fighter, lover, and a weirdo attempt at 'lighter'
I'm limited in my emoji cute whimsy


I combined Fighter and Lover damnit! F-ighter L-over, Lighter! Though I can get pretty hot if given the chance. Or weigh less... though that probably isn't healthy....

poet Anonymous

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Valeriyabeyond
Valeriyabeyond
Dhyana
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To be a Dom person, is
to be a "good person".
The characteristics of a Dom are, someone who
is kind, caring, attentive, strong, assertive,
trustworthy and loving

To be all those things and not be loving is impossible
The sub IS loving, the sub can love the Dom.
To serve a Dom is not being in love it is being who you are, you are expressing your true nature "which can be of a loving nature. . You love your Dom, yes,  but that should not be the basis of your service.
To serve out of love for the Dom you are denying yourself growth
To fall in love with someone then say "I love them I am going to submit sexually into a Dom/sub relationship because I love them and want to show them how much is not what Dom/sub is about.

To enter into a Dom/sub relationship then fall in love because they fulfill your desires that is not the Dom/sub relationship

To put love in the equation is not what the relationship is about the relationship is about you fulfilling your needs you meeting the desires that you demand of yourself to be happy and whole
You need to be the one in control of meeting those needs
For the sub the service or submission is who they are it's the flame inside that burns bright It is the responsibility of the sub to keep the flame lit
It is not the love
that is the emotion that comes from being
one
state of being
the meshing of two individuals the Yo,No
Not the act of hot sex

You can love your Dom and not be "in love" with them
That is the balance of Yo,No


Ingredients
Ingredients
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Bluevelvete said:whimsy shines
winning the dark's devine
insightful pride
became
her truest guide
to peel back the
facade
revealing all the odd
under skins
of those biggest grins


*Sigh* I'm not sure what I am supposed to tell you. Apparently I can't give a critique which is information which might help a fellow poet in this thread which is fuckin' dumb ass shit.

It flowed ok, but it made me feel as if your rhythm was not totally on point. I feel like a better choice of words using an understanding of flow could increase your ability? Specifically in one place I feel contains a word that rhymes with lame, rashad, and bins.

Bluevelvete
Bluevelvete
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but but but.... poems....
Lol
sigh
I tried.

Bluevelvete
Bluevelvete
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Ingredients said:

*Sigh* I'm not sure what I am supposed to tell you. Apparently I can't give a critique which is information which might help a fellow poet in this thread which is fuckin' dumb ass shit.

It flowed ok, but it made me feel as if your rhythm was not totally on point. I feel like a better choice of words using an understanding of flow could increase your ability?


There's a group you can join to be critiqued... that's why none here
just easy
plus... that was on the spot
written and immediately posted
I don't usually do that for poems that I publish
I go over and over those.
these are like rough drafts
At least that's how I look at it.

Bluevelvete
Bluevelvete
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https://deepundergroundpoetry.com/groups/cafe-critique/about/

to be critiqued on your poems, here's the group
just fyi

Ingredients
Ingredients
Twisted Dreamer
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Bluevelvete said:

There's a group you can join to be critiqued... that's why none here
just easy
plus... that was on the spot
written and immediately posted
I don't usually do that for poems that I publish
I go over and over those.
these are like rough drafts
At least that's how I look at it.


I'm sure there is. I am in a few on some other sites, though they are slow. Refresh your page though I added a bit to the end of my quote.

But for an off the cuff poem that's really good. It is very close to flowing perfectly.

poet Anonymous

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Ingredients
Ingredients
Twisted Dreamer
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Velvet Blue

I saw their face,
with velvet, traced.
I couldn't stay away.
Though now its gray,
and now I pray,
that there is something new.
I felt my heart,
it tore apart,
But I watched it as it flew.
I wondered why
As it touched deep sky
Why is it so blue?

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