CORONA VIRUS CURE #4, 5, and 6
#4 take a small shit in a napkin, and then wrap it up in your pocket.
This will help with social distancing.
#5 Wear a necklace of infected dead bats around your neck.
You see, Coronavirus originated from bats,
but the virus mutated so it could live in Asian anteaters ,
As Asians eat these Civets quite often,
an opportunity for one lucky mutated virus presented itself
for it to infect some hapless hungry-for-civets Asian.
If we harken back to how the scourge of smallpox
was eradicated, almost, from our earth,
We find an astute 13 year old British doctor's apprentice
in the country side of England,
who heard local lore from his patients,
that milkmaids never got smallpox,
although they did get sores on their cow milking hands.
When Mr. Jenner graduated from his apprenticeship,
he had concluded that the milkmaids were catching
the cow version of smallpox,
which had mutated to best live in cows,
and only partially was able to infect humans.
Mister Jenner scratched a milkmaid's hand sore,
onto a knife, then took those scratchings, and scratched it
into the child of one of his servants. A few weeks later,
he exposed the child to smallpox, and the child did not get smallpox.
He did this repeatedly, until he was satisfied the cowpox was giving
immunity to human smallpox.
fastforward back to Today,
The bat version of corona virus,
indeed might give immunity to the human corona virus.
Although corona virus is not thought of as an STD,
it is actualy far more catching, so if you
do have $*X, you definitly will get it real bad, this coronavirus,
especially if you have been drinking Corona Lite, or Dos Equis,
because being inebriated makes your body about
80 times more susceptible to any invading
So an addendum to carrying around a piece of shit in your pocket and
wearing a bat necklace,
you may also consider forgoeing new partners
and use the mormon guide to fight off the urge, http://www.ldolphin.org/mormon.html