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Thought Provoker
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Joined 6th Aug 2019
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“Lazy Texting Day”

I’ll stop in a second because I’m now at the top, and that’s of a log-flume, ahh, here we go.
A bag then over my head, and bottled, to have awoke with my head through a hole
Peter Kay in a different scenario, throwing garlic bread, and yelling “fucking cheesecake!”
That’s for what? He continued: “Should call it Rodney’s Mistakes, and Ronnie’s a fake.”
So I’m a Trotter, but still Billy the goat,
that Mr Bean gold frame has been given away, says Dodgy, Kayleigh’s elf peeking out my cupboard
and there’s no telling what he really can show.
She doubted me, like I had with her
having her hair up and not giving head to a Sagittarius.”

Yesterday, the second I woke up I knew I was dreaming. Those white walls, and the two doors in the room were locked.
A doll appeared, when the tv switched itself on, and I heard,
“Hello, Rocky. I want to play a game. For years you’ve had FBI claim you’re a rapper, but what you really want...now we will see if that comedy
show of yours will end up playing endlessly on UK Gold. Have destroyed the Only Fools and Horses packaging, have the D gold chain, on the desk with both of them photos from the sixth series dvd.
We will see at the end, if you can reach those faithful pen-pal diary entries—
So from the back of the Frog’s Legacy case, you might just get from right to left, that photo on the bar
with Rodders wearing his black glasses and coat.
Spitting a cigarette out of his mouth, and Mike looking shocked at two police officers, then some random screen-shot of my from my phone
reading the newspaper from the dates episode
beside Boycie sat in that row.
There’s an image of Raquel laying in bed beside Del Boy, and him holding his “modern men” book, yet on a closer
look at one of your pages, Derek has googly eyes, and it’s an orange Good Nights Await book.
I was thinking, maybe on the table beside them, you could have that screen-shot of Nervous Nerris, with that plonker and his foot in the yellow three-wheeled van, for that model.
Sorry, wrong person. You’re not who I thought.”
There was some loud static, one door in the room opened, and I then was sat in a cubicle, looking at Chloe through glass, pointing up at the wall.
I picked up the phone and she began saying, “Sometimes, it does become almost impossible to live with Alison Bangle.
I mention the words Sheffield wheel...”
“Gis that phone!” shouted who
while “...freedom is what you need to let me feel.”
Facing me and getting back in the flow, she let me know, that he said I had no time to take away
him shouting it would have been my clear up bitch, and herself keeping up with those appearances on the microphone
like Hyacinth Bucket and the Chinese takeaway. But can we talk about your relationship status?
Have tried with someone creating an imbalance, and how you
can’t now cross certain borders.
What puzzle in the newspaper, and its challenge?
I said, “There’s a brown face that’s been bought from the pound shop, an old piece of burnt parchment would look good in that. Was first mentioned by Ryan on the jolly boys outing, in the pub near the fruit machine. What’s everyone talking about, was asked by Jimmy from behind his back, and I had then carried on to say,
we didn’t know who had it last, so it’s that written material with images of Jurassic Park.”

Thought Provoker
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“Silly Billy Trotter”

It’s now twenty-past-six
in the evening
Uncle Albert is sitting
reading the paper in his armchair
and Derek is standing in front of the mirror
fixing his hair
“You better start now, Ronnie, or you’re
not going to get anywhere.”
I said “I’m waiting for the silence to absorb me
can’t think your ideas are right for me
And from Albert
I don’t want another war-time story.”
“Having given it a bit more thought
I’ve come up with something else
and this time, I’m sure you’ll get it...”
Derek said, taking a seat at the table before continuing:
“...so we scrap the idea of Gordon Bennett
and write about the mysterious bubble
floating past the team of astronauts on the moon.”
“Here, Ronnie, why don’t you tell him
what you told me when we were in the takeaway.” Albert said
smirking, and bopping his head from side-to-side
Having got up and walked to the cocktail bar
to get a roll-up out of my tin
I then said “A murder at the hospital
and rhino blood footprints is not on
and I don’t care if the stampede was
heard in Hong Kong by Wong Tong
Anyway, I’m liking what I have at the moment
and that is three men escaping in a Ford Capri Ghia.”
“And?” Albert asked
getting up and following me over to the table
“I’m saying no more.” I replied
“Oh, that’s lovely that...” Derek said
putting on his hat and opening the door beside me “...well, I’ve got a bet
that it won’t be finished before we get
to Hull and back.”
The front door slammed shut
and I sat for a few seconds just staring at Albert
“I’ll only ever be the best I can be.
What are you watching again?”
“It’s Eric, grandma and Bobby going to Miami.
Can’t remember the title.” Albert replied
getting up and returning to his chair
“Did I ever tell you about the time
me and your grandad were on vessel Pee-Wee Brown?”
“I do recall it, yes. We were sitting in The Nags Head, eating cod
and you telling us about you both not being strangers on the shore...”
“That’s right. Once we did get separated
and that was in France.
He always said, that it’s where people would see me off.”
“If you don’t mind, Uncle. I think I’ll go to my room.”

The Cosmic Dragon
Tyrant of Words
United Kingdom
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Oh God, if you saw what was there
I'd be exposed, laid bare
My inclinations, rare

The Cosmic Dragon
Tyrant of Words
United Kingdom
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Joined 10th Dec 2018
Forum Posts: 984

Have you found the behind?


Can you listen
To the rest
Between my breaths?

The moment before
Our lips touch...

Thought Provoker
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“The Trotters Have Jokes”

The time on the clock is telling me it’s five o’clock.
There’s some marmite toast sitting on a plate in front of me, beside a cup of tea, and grandma has just walked out of her bedroom singing. “If yesterday never comes, then tomorrow is fun!”
Having asked if she could keep it down, she said “Just for that, I should sing louder now. And don’t worry about what I’m doing, shouldn’t you be drawing Miranda with a hot chip out her mouth?”
Eric came walking out of the kitchen and said, “Don’t listen to this little twonk, grandma, you can dance alright. And I’m going to the train station later, so we’ll get the speaker for the party, and have your music amplified. What are you up to today, Billy?”
“I’ll be taking a trip to the library, because I’m meeting Anna there.”
“Well, the world has been waiting for that collaboration, and whether or not you can get it done, you know, striking her ass with a hand, and you getting one across the face, when you ask if she fancies an Indian.”
“That would most probably happen to Bobby, and he can’t say his imagination tricks him into seeing something that isn’t really there,” I relied, throwing a ball of paper in Eric’s direction.
“I’m still not eating that pie, as I’ve told you many of times before, I don’t like haddock!” shouted Bobby, from the bathroom.
“Hey, Billy...” grandma said, turning the tv on and sitting down, “...Your mate Twigger, I forgot to say he rang yesterday, said he would shout his name all over an Eminem track, huh, that spunk like DJ Sal Lud.”
“Is there a message that you’d like me to give to him? As I’m heading down the pub later.” Eric said, throwing some T-shirt’s and cologne into his suitcase.
“I’d tell him to quit walking around with that blow-up dolphin.” said Grandma, sniggering to herself.
“Come on, Bobby! Shake a leg! We’ve got to be at the church in ten minutes!” Eric shouted, closing his suitcase and putting it in the hallway, near the front door.
“Only Fools and Horses will be on in an hour-and-half... Fatal Attraction. Will you be around to watch it?” Grandma asked.
“I’m gonna be pretty much tied up all day...”Eric said, sitting down beside me at the table.
“Regardless of it being a present, that brown over-coat is too big on me, and wearing it to the church, it will only push people there to make comparisons to the other Trotter clan.”
“Oh, shut up, you tart.” Eric said, “Just hurry it up. We gotta first meet a man about a crash turban, then it’s ok to the church. And then, I see here in my little book that we’re having to pop round and see your bird, Irene.”
“There’s no greater love,” said grandma, tucking into her strawberries, “In Rick’s cafe, someone said he’d paint a picture of her, even though he was told don’t paint a slut. Bobby...try these.”
I said, “I wouldn’t have joked about that, over what happens to the prat in John Sullivan’s diary.”

Thought Provoker
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Saw a YouTube video of
Milla Jovovich explaining the last Resident Film
She said something about going back to
the beginning to find the end
But her father created the T-Virus for her ageing disease?
But Angie, the little girl in Resident Evil apocalypse isn’t the younger Alice
and Angie’s father was supposedly the one who created the virus
who bare in mind
doesn’t look like Alice’s father
so it’s yet again
another what the fuck
of trying to understand movies

Thought Provoker
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Was on a YouTube video
that I found out the picture is on his Instagram
A red pen to add two letters
so it looks like it says “boner”
on the back of a one dollar bill
Yet people are speculating it’s the release of a new album
On the 13th December
because of the B looking like the number 13
and I forgot what the other was supposed to have meant
Maybe then I’ll have the curtain closed
but I don’t always listen
neither write to Eminem’s music
Haven’t even looked properly through my window
to know I’ve heard some toes
creep up and for that snail-mail
said it’s all useless
the ice caps are melting
so putting in that much efforts just pointless

Thought Provoker
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People are always making them
and then breaking them
so it’s laughed at whether or not I’m gonna stick to my New Years resolution
Only have the cannabis in a standard small Rizla
can’t deal with bongs anymore
and I got out of mixing alcohol with weed the first time I tried it
I read Brad’s “Day 2” poem
and thought to tell him that he’s stronger than me
as he’s been on that harder substance
quit for all that time
and I’ve only quit for just over three months

Thought Provoker
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I assume you’ve cleaned the wax out your ears?
A little hard to hurt someone
that’s been dead on the inside for years
I’ve had many test me
then disappeared to laugh behind my back
though, I’ve been that waiter
asking them to wait there
and if I could really see their reality check
Mistake was her thinking
I’m someone she’s gonna come back to get
and let that faggot instead be the Peckham Pouncer
if he’s stressed about my projects that have been left
Ricky needs to stay off that bad weed
because that amnesia in the light sure is sparkling
Now that high horse is what they keep you on
and I feel like who’s child turning up
and yelling “Holy wank, shit, bollocks fuck to that, turn the tv off!”

Thought Provoker
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It ain’t easy

I think I know why they
want to come back to shoot me
because every line really says
I just want Anna to touch my winky
I’m sure it is lovely
I mean her pussy going in a butty
hide next time as someone
named Patrick Boogy
I think the competition really did say
“rap did lose me.”
And still trying to figure it out

Thought Provoker
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It ain’t easy (part 2)

It seems to be the rumour at every high school
You have the statement of me wanting to talk to Anna
and Eamon somehow intercepts my call
I do keep a lot hidden
and what I show isn’t even half decent and I am sorry
because I should come with something half decent
Though, I’m still inspired by regular people
they think it’s just some of that blah blah
like alligator, Mr Bean and David
in a boat with Jessica rowing wherever you are
some of that rarr rarr on the streets ahhh
Wait until you are me
you’d then be able to see why it wouldn’t work talking to a doctor
and I’d rather speak to a priest
so are you a good listener
because I got that job proposition from the fourth riddler

“The car is gonna swerve off the road
because of a hologram
You’ll then be in that blonde wig
and white dress
Only be soaked in gasoline and lit
for a minute
Grabbing his face for that possession
Trust me and the deal
We will make a better remake of the Gothika film.”

Thought Provoker
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“Good Nights Await: Just Another Manic Sunday”

It’s now half-two in the morning.
Was suddenly awoken by the balcony doors swinging open.
I could hear talking out in the corridor, and only heard “That’s really getting to me, you know. How can you not have all of the Lord of the Rings films put together on the dvd case?”
Looked out the peep-hole and saw Jimmy and Claire in the corridor.
Now I’m sat with a cup of tea, in the corner of the room, realising on the other side is where I’ve left the remote control.

It’s now half-three.
There’s a lot of commotion outside, like two fire engines with their blue lights flashing.
Paul Sketchers had not long been on the news, him saying “It all began with the jokes being made about Ricky’s Only Fools and Horses drafts, Brian Plasters said he was not trying. Now Ryan asked us what he’s doing now, told him he’s making movements being Tony Angelino, with his song crying. In other news, there’s a special guest having a backstage pass at one of tonight’s poetry slams, being held in the canteen of the Good Nights Await hotel...”
I didn’t hear anymore because knocking came from my door. Got up and opened that, to find Redrick standing there. “Doesn’t matter the distance, because I’m obviously here, dreaming and asleep in Aylesbury Prison.” I asked if he knew what was going on outside and he continued:
“Someone thinking they’re a pretty arsonist, decided to set fire to Trickful Woods cabin shop, as soon as the debates started, about who survived and tried to keep the Deep Underground Poetry site alive.”
Having walked out to the car park with him, Michelle approached us, blowing the steam off her plastic cup of coffee. “It’s annoying when people have to spoil things, isn’t it? I hear in the last few months, an old walkway was renewed, lights being put in the ground and what have ya—to then only have some idiot who can’t appreciate nothing, and smashing four of the lights.”
She dropped her cup, near Aktar’s feet, and he then said “You’d lose your head if it wasn’t glued on. How’s your mother finding them screws? Is she still going strong?”
“No need for that.” Redrick said
“And I suppose what you really want now, is to clean this patch?” Aktar replied, sternly, wiping his trousers, and then walking off towards the swings.
I told Redrick I was going back indoors, to run a bath and Jimmy caught me standing outside of the elevator. “I’m going up to watch Saw 2.” He said, walking in the elevator, and pushing the button to his floor. “You probably don’t want me talking about this, but I over-heard the conversation you and Claire were having yesterday morning, and I gotta say, man, just keep having that idiot ignored. Mentioning something that was well out of line, like a complete psychopath, knowing you’d write about it, and it then putting you in a deep hole—even though there is no facts behind his statement, it’s that narcissist trying to paint a certain image of you. But he can shout fuck the police and think he’s above the law all he wants, because I understand—You maybe many things but not that, so he has no choice but to be careful.”
I said, “It already feels awkward. Mouth going dry from the sheer shock of what the asshole was saying, that day on the estate. A sister complaining of him raising his fists when going round, to then come downstairs and start shouting off all that she was—Was unbelievable, and it’s still effecting me slightly. One fat naive woman has clearly based her opinions on my whole life, from that one observation, so now when having walked past the bus station, I saw her walking with other people, and from that awkward look, couldn’t hear what words were muttered to the person he was walking beside, but something was said. Ahh well, I’m so fucking prepared to keep my distance and strike out if really necessary because I’m bothering no one, and about his life, I really don’t give a fuck. I will continue being that fake writer, and not picking up a pen.”
After myself and Redrick parted, I stepped out of the elevator and could see Alex, throwing a ninja turtle at what looked like his next door neighbours dog.
“Hey, little man.” I said, walking up and patting him on the back. “I hope your mum is doing alright, and you’re not getting annoyed by your brother. They said you shouldn’t know, although I think it’s only right so Seden has had ‘Not Alone’ cut into her skin.”
As I was opening my door, Constantine shouted
from down the end of the hallway, and walked up saying
“I took your advice and bought my laminating machine from Wilkinson’s. Let me see what pieces you’ve laminated tomorrow, we talk about it over a fry-up, and what’s still to come for Christmas.”

Thought Provoker
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A day before my Birthday
could possibly meet in the town-centre
for me to get that “chill” book
which has to be put in a small black bag because it’s pink
Walked home the first time
inside my coat I was carrying it
A whip to the tip of a limp dick
for competition and having something more unique created
he’s obviously that last one deserves it
so they don’t really know how fast I’m working
Gotta draw again Willy Wonka
and the rest of the crew stood in a line
A Wonka bar and a golden ticket
Will have to do a few pages
and make references from the Goblet or Fire film
considering Larry Trotter and his goblet of cider was mentioned
on that gold Mr Bean frame
so again, I’m gonna be drawing Dobby stood on a bed
the purple Knight Bus on the shelf
and then Harry Potter and Voldemort duelling
I know someone that would argue with a mathematician
over how many times he’s had authority come calling
We differ somewhat in our fun bullshit
because that to me is poetry
laminating the odd stuff and papers that would look
fitting in that small box in the pound shop
because it’s for Tyler
Of my favourite films
I would have cut the front image off and wrote on the back
damn drawings are coming out more crap than usual
because the pencils are getting small

It’s an evaluation from Lawrence Spiral
that he hasn’t got nothing except the girls
to show for his thirteen year relationship
and isn’t much of a sentimentalist
but he has got a one track record
A camera was hidden in the cupboard
I did hear and see everything from their last meeting
He said he’s seeing visions of a
puppet walking around and talking
without batteries
laughs with an oxygen mask
and he doesn’t want to stand him
so I sat and had a ham sandwich watching the doctor tell him
“Do like how you’ve used some clones
We sure do need some more Brian’s
firing a rocket launcher backwards
Flipping shit, tell me this is God’s will bro
kind of like the movie Four Lions
Running and being bombed
as well as the video, keep the song.”
The type of man to try and run
get the attention during the bride and grooms dance
but being grabbed by the collar and choked
like the little fucker should be

I’m curious as to know who she’s talking about
when she mentioned certain people
running back to those they wished dead
My mum and my brother instantly popped into my head
I feel more happier not being involved in that serious pettiness
and there really is only so much you can do for some people
that can’t see past their own nose
and seek to get the help
so she doesn’t drink to get like it anymore like she used to
and neither laughs as much like it
to have someone say
“Someone get her up the stairs quicker
or get her knickers off
because she’s gonna piss herself.”
Was sitting in the room for well over a year
so again I probably won’t see her
but I’d sit and thank Marie for leaving an old tenner
in that Ghostbusters video case
because it did get changed in the bank
Real time, it being twenty-past-two
on Tuesday 26th November 2019 in the afternoon
what next in telling you how I feel
Well, can’t be bothered to walk to the corner-shop
but I need some more milk

Not where I’d like
so if they’d have been on YouTube
watching The Snare movie
at the beginning of it
when driving through that quiet village
not sure where it is
but I’d be there to live
Though, am trying to stay creative
compared to them who aren’t and being buried in gold chains
stupid man covered in gold glitter
still gonna rot in a brown box
so he won’t neither keep me down
when I’m here now
trying to make up for not being around
Now that’s wasting money on buying internet
knowing I’ve got unlimited texts
but I’m cautious about where I go and what I send
so others wouldn’t have then
been able to pick up this frequency
But feel like I’ve also been
and is being anti social
with not commenting
I’m still yet to go back on the Overflow thread
and put new posts over old ones
though, a few already have been done
What could I manage in a month?
Probably come back with a scene selection

Thought Provoker
United Kingdom
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“The Blade and 50 Pence - Now We Shoot”
(The Game ft 50 Cent - How We Do)

This is how we do
We make a move and act a fool
while we up in the club
This is how we do
Nobody do it like we do it
so show us some love

Would have had a snapped neck
but I should have been then
the zombie in the first Resident Evil film dead
with his head between Alice’s legs
Back to reality, just as well
because I’d reach old age with at least one foot in the grave
watching a few shows of them still
Say myself as that old man yelling
“What in the name of bloody hell?!”
I am gangster, it’s for that other thing you need to tell them
because it’s a lie now
You know it’s not me as James Carter
just Inspector Lee watching someone ask if I can understand
the words coming out my mouth
I let people who like to talk let them talk
see how full shit they are
telling me you’re this kinda star
and have lotta feeling for Anna
big bulge in pants like wow

You have just been cut by the blade
now hear 50 Pence I do say
25 Ken isn’t mine, no way is my son gay
that’s a boxing glove
taking the head off Rocky
Shot myself 9 times and left with only a thumb up
you’re getting sloppy but wait a second
Two-ninety-nine come again with the chorus

This is how we do
We make a move and act a fool
while we up in the club
This is how we do
Nobody do it like we do it
so show us some love

Thought Provoker
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