Poetry competition CLOSED 7th March 2017 4:25am
WINNER
Anonymous
Anonymous
RUNNERS-UP:
Afroqn73
and mel44
Page:
romance
Poetry Contest Description
Share romantic poems.
Romance: a feeling of excitement and mystery associated with love.
Poems will get comments explaining good features as well as subjective areas of improvement. If you want comments, then put your poem webpage's full url link (or just the 6 digits that are within that url) at the bottom of your posts.
You are allowed to submit a poem that you've written before, even if I've commented on it or it's been in my previous romance contest.
You can submit 3 poems maximum. Don't edit your posts, after the contest has closed.
please send me a private message with any questions.
Here's some inspiration from last competition:
=====
Dreaming of You (Tanka)
My skin dreams of dew
Watching the fan twirl and whirl
Flirting with the breeze
I am like the waning moon
Night after night missing you
=====
Read With Me
come,
read with me
let's drown
in these pages
together
each word pulling
us further in
so far
we lose focus
of breathing
we just want
more
and more
each page
burning with desire,
as well as lost fire
every word
vibrating my
pulse
in complete
rhythm with
your own
all of my hidden
thoughts
bled upon
the pages
pouring from
the soul
getting lost
in the passion
of you
hands intertwined
fantasy & reality
collide
every word
dropping from
the pages
as rain
awakening
the desert soul
feasting
consuming
embracing
never shall
there be
enough
of
this story
of us
=====
This Knight
My shield, I have cast aside
My sword, is sheathed and
Sits against your bedroom door
I have abandoned my armor
Tonight
This knight
Comes to you
Open, vulnerable to your whims
Tonight, I am not a knight
I am only a simple man
With simple needs
That only you can satiate
Poems will get comments explaining good features as well as subjective areas of improvement. If you want comments, then put your poem webpage's full url link (or just the 6 digits that are within that url) at the bottom of your posts.
You are allowed to submit a poem that you've written before, even if I've commented on it or it's been in my previous romance contest.
You can submit 3 poems maximum. Don't edit your posts, after the contest has closed.
please send me a private message with any questions.
Here's some inspiration from last competition:
=====
Dreaming of You (Tanka)
My skin dreams of dew
Watching the fan twirl and whirl
Flirting with the breeze
I am like the waning moon
Night after night missing you
=====
Read With Me
come,
read with me
let's drown
in these pages
together
each word pulling
us further in
so far
we lose focus
of breathing
we just want
more
and more
each page
burning with desire,
as well as lost fire
every word
vibrating my
pulse
in complete
rhythm with
your own
all of my hidden
thoughts
bled upon
the pages
pouring from
the soul
getting lost
in the passion
of you
hands intertwined
fantasy & reality
collide
every word
dropping from
the pages
as rain
awakening
the desert soul
feasting
consuming
embracing
never shall
there be
enough
of
this story
of us
=====
This Knight
My shield, I have cast aside
My sword, is sheathed and
Sits against your bedroom door
I have abandoned my armor
Tonight
This knight
Comes to you
Open, vulnerable to your whims
Tonight, I am not a knight
I am only a simple man
With simple needs
That only you can satiate
the url links are not working in the past competition, so here are my comments:
=====
Éternité
the empty moments
turn to days & weeks & months,
caged eternity—
real life encroaching lovers,
taking leave amid the rain
abandoning us—
we who try to keep time still,
fallen to our knees
surrounded in the deluge,
casting our passions amuck
forsaking us here
where we take what we have left
and forget the rest—
there is 'now' with you alone
as there always was before
-----
the theme of time and eternity is very powerful and emotional, especially within the last 2 lines. The sympathetic tone, for the the encroaching lovers, feels a little weak with the antagonistic verb choice "amuck." but I like the resolution of the struggle, within your last stanza.
=====
MY STRANGER
i. Hit
I was pleased to be just me
Unaffected, jolly and sometimes, serene
Other times angry, but otherwise happy
Then you came and everything changed
I felt a sudden missing that wasn't there before
I don't want nor need it, but loneliness persisted
In my heart, something constantly grows so painfully
A hallow within, aching to be filled by something
ii. Denial
I looked the other way, walking past by you
Convinced myself that only if I faithfully ignore
Would the malady be gone and I would be cured
Much like a bad wind gushing fleetingly ahead
I am fine, I could take it, if I could just hold it in
I closed my eyes and run blindly away
The further I am, the less affected I'd be
I'll be happy alone, just like before...
iii. Acceptance
Or so I thought, but I was wrong
The more I denied, the more it pains
The more I run away, the more tired I became
I could never be free, distance is just an illusion
What I really needed, is to be with you
No one else would fit this empty hallow
Without you, a half-life is what I would follow
Like a moon without the sun in its horizon
iv. Plead
So wont you, take me with you?
Would you love me as I do?
Forgive my foolishness and embrace me instead
With your eyes in tears and a smile on your face.
Will you accept my heart, broken as it is
Of my own doing and no one else
Please fill me in and make me whole
Give me air, heal me, make me live a full life!
v. Promise
I swear, never to be afraid anymore
I won't let go, I won't be moved,
I would make us a home, a family...
Together we'd weave the future
Together we will be stronger
Even at times of great struggle
We will survive, you and I
Because we are undivided, as one
vi. Grateful
In the crowded crossroad of life
Chances were given for the both of us
Blessed are we to find each other
Amids the chaos of countless encounters
Thank you for waiting to meet me this lifetime
For just being you, with me, for me... by me
For letting me be the shadow of your light
For making me the glimmer you follow in the dark
vii. Pledge
I loved you from yeterday
Love you still today
And would love you more
Till tomorrow ceased to be
My beloved stranger
Stranger no more
viii. Not the end
-----
The title is a very creative oxymoron where "my" suggests personal ownership or familiarity, yet "stranger" presents a feel of mystery and unknown. This piece was quite uncomfortably long. Nonetheless, the personal piece presents a nice mix of mystery and love, with an interesting emotional (man vs. self) struggle.
=====
broken wings
Too close to the sun I flew
Recklessness was all I knew
Then along came you
Soothing presence healing my wounds
-----
The half-rhyming is quite good. Your piece feels quite vague: its romantic theme is questionable. But the sudden change in atmosphere is interesting within your 3rd line, shown by its sudden shortness.
=====
#21 Tigress
Beast are you sleeping?
I gaze upon your beauty-gently entwining my body with yours
Wrapping your limbs in mine
Feeling the softness of your fur
Hearing your soft, slow, rhythmic snores
In your throat the deep rumble of your purrs
Beast are you sleeping?
I gaze into your face as your ears and whiskers twitch -I try to imagine your dreamscape with the colors both vibrant and rich
Do you run through the tall grass wild and free?
Or do you leap high into the air off of a narrow precipice
Splashing down into a crystal clear blue lagoon fathoms deep?
Yes my beast-weary from the hunt-exhausted from chasing-drained from raging-sleep
And dream of whatever slumbering beasts dream
Until the time you are called upon again
Sleep your sweet, peaceful slumber
While I stare at you in awe
Eyes misty ogling you with childlike wonder
-----
I like your interesting personification of the tigress. The last line felt a little awkward. But the tigress's beast/beauty nature is very fascinating.
=====
Éternité
the empty moments
turn to days & weeks & months,
caged eternity—
real life encroaching lovers,
taking leave amid the rain
abandoning us—
we who try to keep time still,
fallen to our knees
surrounded in the deluge,
casting our passions amuck
forsaking us here
where we take what we have left
and forget the rest—
there is 'now' with you alone
as there always was before
-----
the theme of time and eternity is very powerful and emotional, especially within the last 2 lines. The sympathetic tone, for the the encroaching lovers, feels a little weak with the antagonistic verb choice "amuck." but I like the resolution of the struggle, within your last stanza.
=====
MY STRANGER
i. Hit
I was pleased to be just me
Unaffected, jolly and sometimes, serene
Other times angry, but otherwise happy
Then you came and everything changed
I felt a sudden missing that wasn't there before
I don't want nor need it, but loneliness persisted
In my heart, something constantly grows so painfully
A hallow within, aching to be filled by something
ii. Denial
I looked the other way, walking past by you
Convinced myself that only if I faithfully ignore
Would the malady be gone and I would be cured
Much like a bad wind gushing fleetingly ahead
I am fine, I could take it, if I could just hold it in
I closed my eyes and run blindly away
The further I am, the less affected I'd be
I'll be happy alone, just like before...
iii. Acceptance
Or so I thought, but I was wrong
The more I denied, the more it pains
The more I run away, the more tired I became
I could never be free, distance is just an illusion
What I really needed, is to be with you
No one else would fit this empty hallow
Without you, a half-life is what I would follow
Like a moon without the sun in its horizon
iv. Plead
So wont you, take me with you?
Would you love me as I do?
Forgive my foolishness and embrace me instead
With your eyes in tears and a smile on your face.
Will you accept my heart, broken as it is
Of my own doing and no one else
Please fill me in and make me whole
Give me air, heal me, make me live a full life!
v. Promise
I swear, never to be afraid anymore
I won't let go, I won't be moved,
I would make us a home, a family...
Together we'd weave the future
Together we will be stronger
Even at times of great struggle
We will survive, you and I
Because we are undivided, as one
vi. Grateful
In the crowded crossroad of life
Chances were given for the both of us
Blessed are we to find each other
Amids the chaos of countless encounters
Thank you for waiting to meet me this lifetime
For just being you, with me, for me... by me
For letting me be the shadow of your light
For making me the glimmer you follow in the dark
vii. Pledge
I loved you from yeterday
Love you still today
And would love you more
Till tomorrow ceased to be
My beloved stranger
Stranger no more
viii. Not the end
-----
The title is a very creative oxymoron where "my" suggests personal ownership or familiarity, yet "stranger" presents a feel of mystery and unknown. This piece was quite uncomfortably long. Nonetheless, the personal piece presents a nice mix of mystery and love, with an interesting emotional (man vs. self) struggle.
=====
broken wings
Too close to the sun I flew
Recklessness was all I knew
Then along came you
Soothing presence healing my wounds
-----
The half-rhyming is quite good. Your piece feels quite vague: its romantic theme is questionable. But the sudden change in atmosphere is interesting within your 3rd line, shown by its sudden shortness.
=====
#21 Tigress
Beast are you sleeping?
I gaze upon your beauty-gently entwining my body with yours
Wrapping your limbs in mine
Feeling the softness of your fur
Hearing your soft, slow, rhythmic snores
In your throat the deep rumble of your purrs
Beast are you sleeping?
I gaze into your face as your ears and whiskers twitch -I try to imagine your dreamscape with the colors both vibrant and rich
Do you run through the tall grass wild and free?
Or do you leap high into the air off of a narrow precipice
Splashing down into a crystal clear blue lagoon fathoms deep?
Yes my beast-weary from the hunt-exhausted from chasing-drained from raging-sleep
And dream of whatever slumbering beasts dream
Until the time you are called upon again
Sleep your sweet, peaceful slumber
While I stare at you in awe
Eyes misty ogling you with childlike wonder
-----
I like your interesting personification of the tigress. The last line felt a little awkward. But the tigress's beast/beauty nature is very fascinating.
Comet-trysting
There are moments of passing
each other like pieces of
stars from two moons colliding.
So far apart, between trysts
as we circle around suns,
fired up, pulled apart by
gravity, then surfing rings
of braided ice, becoming
trails of swelling comet tails.
Bringing our passion's climax
to the brink before we leave
once again when fires fade.
Artwork is done on MSPaint as "mousework", the image & poem are original by Jade Pandora, Copyright ©2016. All Rights Reserved.
each other like pieces of
stars from two moons colliding.
So far apart, between trysts
as we circle around suns,
fired up, pulled apart by
gravity, then surfing rings
of braided ice, becoming
trails of swelling comet tails.
Bringing our passion's climax
to the brink before we leave
once again when fires fade.
Artwork is done on MSPaint as "mousework", the image & poem are original by Jade Pandora, Copyright ©2016. All Rights Reserved.
Written by Jade-Pandora
(jade tiger)
Go To Page
Anonymous
Related submission no longer exists.
Adore
Always my passion
most precious love I've known
could not live without you
caring not to stand alone
Beside you I am whole
never more complete
loving me always
no others compete
All the parts of you
my lover, I adore
my existence
soul mates ever more
Holding you in my heart
desire embraced
feel how much I love you
you are my saving grace
most precious love I've known
could not live without you
caring not to stand alone
Beside you I am whole
never more complete
loving me always
no others compete
All the parts of you
my lover, I adore
my existence
soul mates ever more
Holding you in my heart
desire embraced
feel how much I love you
you are my saving grace
Written by mel44
(Melgar)
Go To Page
Lauryn
Love, It’s a peculiar thing, shown by vast commodities or diamond rings. It kills as well as it heals but it's often said only for cheap thrills. But I must say the love I hold for you is not something you can knock out of a shoe. Our love holds me close and whispers sweet secrets in my ear. Secrets that you my dear need to hear. Love tells me that my forever is held in your hands, it humbles me, makes me see that I'm just a man. Every man needs a woman by his side. One that will be there for him when he may cry. And one that will mourn him when he one day dies. But such a relationship must be mutual for it to blossom into something useful. Lauryn, I swear on my life a love like ours is foreign. You hold the only key to my heart, you hold my world only you could tear it apart. I've given you all of me, everything that you see it's yours. You only have brought my life to a path that I will gladly travel before you, my world was nothing but unraveled. Baby, I am hoping that maybe, just maybe you're the one. To fill a hole In my heart as wide as the sun. Lauryn love is a peculiar thing and I hope to give you all of the commodities and maybe one day….a diamond ring.
Written by EdgarAllanPoetry
(Tristan Edgar)
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