Poetry competition CLOSED 7th December 2016 1:00pm
WINNER
gardenlover
View Profile Poems by gardenlover
rosette
RUNNERS-UP: RevolutionAL and calamitygin

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WLTM

poet Anonymous

Poetry Contest

Write a humorous WLTM  advert
Write a humorous Would like to meet add for a newspaper. First
prize will be awarded for the funnest innuendo, second for the most bazaar and third for the most concise description.

This might get a bit offensive, try to be as eloquently crass as possible.

Here is a loose format:

Describe a fictional character in one short sentence,
Then describe what said character is looking for in a partner in another short sentence. bare in mind that the more words you use the less likely you are to win.

There is no limit on entries  
new writes are preferred, if this idea has been done before.

P.S I won't be putting this to a vote, I've decided to make myself fudge and executioner    

poet Anonymous

Frosty muscular mountain dweller female. Seeks gentleman of the forest. Big feet preferable.

gardenlover
gardenlover
Fire of Insight
United Kingdom
23awards   profile   poems   message
Joined 19th Aug 2012
Forum Posts: 625

Fully funtional octogenarian  has pecker in need of sanctuary

Virgin clubber seeks visit from active member

Lonely male pilgrim; Seeks passage to heaven

Precocious maiden seeks gang for a bang

poet Anonymous

Nice one Garden lover,
I like the last one best. very to the point

Fizzle
Fizzle
Ammiture
Twisted Dreamer
United States
1awards   profile   poems   message
Joined 5th Sep 2016
Forum Posts: 95

Philanthropic Philosophy professor, female; seeking Platonic beneficiary with phallic fortitude.

poet Anonymous

~ 💉~
Phlebotomist seeks:
Allium free appendage,
bold veins with pulse...please?

poet Anonymous

Pirate wench into knots seeks man not afraid of nautical attire:
If you steer my ship, I'll float your boat.


RevolutionAL
RevolutionAL
Alistair Plint
Dangerous Mind
South Africa
29awards   profile   poems   message
Joined 24th July 2012
Forum Posts: 1257

Male vegetarian polygamist seeks
Female  monogamous carnivour, for cheat nights

SatansSperm
SatansSperm
Dangerous Mind
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Joined 19th Nov 2015
Forum Posts: 3112

noose
looking for a neck
for swingers party

SatansSperm
SatansSperm
Dangerous Mind
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Joined 19th Nov 2015
Forum Posts: 3112

psychopath
looking for LMF any race
to paint the town red

SatansSperm
SatansSperm
Dangerous Mind
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Joined 19th Nov 2015
Forum Posts: 3112

pencil
looking for eraser
to fix my mistakes

SatansSperm
SatansSperm
Dangerous Mind
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Joined 19th Nov 2015
Forum Posts: 3112

bit of a dick
who would like to meet
someone who believes
size doesn't matter

SatansSperm
SatansSperm
Dangerous Mind
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Joined 19th Nov 2015
Forum Posts: 3112

virgin piece of paper
would like to meet
envelope
to hold me

SatansSperm
SatansSperm
Dangerous Mind
13awards   profile   poems   message
Joined 19th Nov 2015
Forum Posts: 3112

pupil
would like to meet
iris
for sight seeing

poet Anonymous

Nice one to all

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