fayke avatarz

Bee respekfull az yew kann bee.
Lyke da armee.
Bee awl yew kann bee.
Yew kann bee a fayke avatarr writin' 'bout yerself.
Onlee won entree.
Unless off korse yer a fayke avatar.
Den da possibilytees r endliss.
Onlee a reel poeit will win.
We no who dey r.
Have sum phun wit itt.

Evrybodee hertz.
Axe Mikel.
Wryte onn peeple....da whirld iz yer oystirr!
Nobodee tellz yew where tew goe.
Gett off.
Uze werdz.

My avatar --a steaming cup of black coffee ---
And here is my story.


I drink my coffee black.
Stirring sugar into it,
Is the vision I have of you,
As we sat sipping in the morning,
And the taste of your lips,
That still lingers,
Decades later.

Cream mixed in becomes,
The liquid chocolate of your skin,
Still brings tingling to mine,
And is a memory,
That delights my eyes,
Decades later.

Decades later,
Still,
Heartache,
Heartbreak,
Hurt,
Regret.

In lament,
I drink my coffee black.

Ya Volt, Kapitiene!    
 
I am turd of being Nazi Grammar Polize.      
I till dah sheepers dere mitstakes    
and I get sheet throne at meine batch.    
Dey screem at meh, “I tare your rink wit yor own red hooks!”  
 
I totter Aus Elsyum and wave weinersnitzle in der faze.    
“I’ll take you to Kommandeur Peitschenwurm!” Ice screm.    
“He will smack dah dew fromme yor Edelweiss!”    
   
Dey har still laughfink. LOWD.

I gnaw nothink aboot fallz itenditties. Deh poots all loog same to meh.
I see unly chatter as skulls in shatter. Ledderz lug like bonez in boxes of bomba shelles.
I am seeg of dickin in zee dirt for troot.  
   
I am doon! KAPUT!      
   
WHY do you spit at me?!      
I slamp meine badge on youz dirty bumker!    
I ham no more yor sniffle nozz or Boo-Boo hound!    
Dam your gramma!!!!!

---Sinkcerely,
Goosteppe



This was written by Holly Dove. I may not have my acct active at the time this comp is judged.

My avatar is me.
Though it could be updated to something more recently.
Originally I wrote poetry under two identities
Kimmy Alan was my primary.
snugglebuck when I wrote something naughty.
But here's what I did not foresee.
Within months all my family, friends, coworkers and enemies, discovered my poetry almost immediately.
My 13 year old niece, "you're embarrassing me uncle Kimmy."
So much for fucking anonymity.
When I visit my hometown city
Punks drive by and yell
"Hey snugglebuck, write anything sexy?"

Ya Little Bastards!  Go ask your mothers.

Avatar

Yeah its me
Im a little of a rebel
I like to show my face
Just so that those who don’t like me
Have a little something to look at
But those that don’t its fine
I understand
You like you privacy
Or maybe you’re a little scared
Scared that your boss will find
You that its your poems that
He jerks his cock to
You know that you like it
You listen by the door
As he moans your pen name
I say walk in and finish that poem for him
Finish it good too.

Cupid Curios

a little pillow talk before it gets dark
in prison
it's hard to stand at attention when your ass is itching
but you learn the alphabet of love
you and I will often go together with hearts
seals don't play with sharks
deals are made with handshakes
pigs squeal when they run out of pancakes
a woman burns the world that a man makes
but the shadow warriors never panic
they feel the force before it becomes an abomination
hard work yearns for vacation as the desert yearns
for precipitation
a mask may make a man more majestic than he appears
but behind every mistake made lies an opportunity
for tears
 

i don't need your faces

they hide behind their
black and whites
maybe it makes them feel
like they make a statement
tough
classic
noir even
hiding a face
behind a mask of
brute force poetry

i wonder if they feel
dry smoke in their
mouth as they drip
words to the page
how many cups
of sweet black coffee
does it take to
produce the structure
that keeps
me coming back
line after line

pulling punches
leaned back against
a hazy wall
wooing women without realizing
(or maybe they do
but it doesn’t matter)

so sit back
behind your stark
little square to the right
and make my day

Avatar of Grace

the avatar of Grace
a plain Jane indeed
that's just me
without my done face
one day I will wear make-up
and shock everyone
cos they wouldn't know me

I have been a flower
and a chair too
I have been a bunch of lavender
sorry dear Mlavender
I've been a fire
and a passing ship

but they are just fantasy
of who I wish to be
the real me
is this
plain Jane...
Just me.

nope. had to delete. it threw someone under the bus.

I have a well managed multi dimensional structure
that makes me unique as a Penthouse Inferno rising above the crowd
I sing before humanity and beg aliens to return my soul
and, in return I get a wide mouth of wiseass respect

Yes indeedy. Can you see my teethy in my wicked smile?

A good head often flickers into my thought
I have courage to scale porn billboards and plagiarize them.
I leave my signature tongue shining on each
but sometimes the lamp bulbs shatter when I lick them.

Do you know my pain?  Don't give ugly look to me!
I am the Troll God here, ya see?
No one but me can look so ugh-ly.

you see, my mother tells me that I write the best.
Moma and I share pillow talk
I think about my poems that are my life

OH mama I'm in fear for my life from the loose legs of the hawr.


Am i writing well? Why don't anybody read me?
I am ACKussed of poetry murder.
Dah blunder is in my underwear.

My life is rather boring. I blows like dirty socks on a loose line dotted with crow shit...
My wife has made up my mind;
I'm going to change password to the black mirror of my future.

and the pissword is HEIL HYDRA

Super Funky Sock Monkey Dance


Sock Monkey, Sock Monkey
Does a dance that's super funky
Super funky sock monkey dance
Like there's a human hand right up his pants

Now, don't yawl be hatin
On that primate in the D to the U to the P
You don't even see
There just so happens to be
More than one monkey than meets the eye
In the nanner tree up high
Although low on the evolutionary scale
Sock Monkey tried too hard to be
All that he could be
Grand epitome of an epic fail

Sock Monkey fought every super villain
He was a dozen of the baddest superheroes
Spent his days off in the backyard chillin
Cooking gyros for neighbors
Touching their wieners he was grillin

Sock Monkey was a brain surgeon
And the most brilliant of rocket scientists
He once fought off a school of sharks
Using only his bare fists
While riding bareback on sturgeon

Then one day
Poor Sock Monkey
Forgot who he was supposed to be
It caused a schizophrenic calamity
And all he could do was a
Super funky sock monkey dance
Like there was a human hand up his pants
Com'on and dance for us monkey
Do it real funky

Nanna nanna nanna na na
Nanna nanna nanna
Com'on, dance for us monkey
And do your super funky sock monkey dance

This may or many not be a collaboration. It was an old poem dating back 8+ years, written by one of my alts.

She has recently given me permission to update it. Because we're fake avatars, we can do shit like that.

Keep in mind that because a huge chunk of this is almost a decade old, those who originally inspired it are no longer around to enjoy it.  


One Trick Pony ( Dead Horse Walking )


That isn't a photographic likeness of me
It isn't who I am
Just like this is not my real name

Here to write poetry
Not interested in your silly scam
Rewriting the rules in your favor
Score kept in a petty game

There's absolutely no contest in this
System you think you are gaming
Seriously, you call that winning?
Plain obvious for all to see
Your lagging behind
Dragging your feet

'Fraid to lay it all on the table
Phoning in another ripped verse
Uninspired lyric
Doomed forever to be
The last in long line
Funeral procession of a Deadbeat

I really don't give a fuck
No, I really don't give a fuck
Whut? Whut?!?
Ask me if I give a fuck
And I'll gladly tell you that I don't
Listen up
You dumb mother
Whut?
I really don't give a fuck
Whut? Whut?!?
One way or the other
Take down the FOR SALE sign
Cuz you've been owned

Less action
Always more talk
The same ole reaction
As you predictably balk
It would be funny
If you weren't so goddam phony
Too bad for you
Bullshit doesn't count
Time to dismount
Back away slowly from this high horse
And remove your dick from the ass of this
One trick pony

Haunted
By the shallow breath
This gasping horse you've so often
Beaten to death
Undaunted
As we suffer through your rants
Can't get a word in edgewise
You don't give anyone else the chance

Dead horse walking
While you just keep talking
Endlessly with what you deem worth repeating
It only prolongs the beating

I've had my fill
Runneth over is my cup
Will you for once in your jaded life
Just shut the fuck up?

If you were doped to the gills
With sodium pentothal
It would be a blessing to us all
To hear the truth for a change

There just aren't enough pills
To put you back in your stall
If it truly was my call
I'd take you to the shooting range

Put you out of our misery
Cock back the trigger
And pull it
Bitch slapping you would be my pleasure
Sparing us the cost of the bullet

Open your eyes
Attention Whore
Shut your thighs
And listen up
You can't force sympathy to happen
Congrats on winning the Loser's Cup
Spilling over with horses' piss
That you failed to take with rants like this

No one fucking cares
It just had to be said

No one fucking cares
Just one bullet to the head

No one fucking cares
Who we are behind an avatar

No one fucking cares
This one trick pony is as good as dead

No one