The Letter

Dear Seventeen-Year-Old  Cellar


You gotta lotta problems
And you never take time to solve them

You break shit and say it's because you're confused
Pushing everyone away and don't realize what you'll lose

Try to keep yourself in control when you feel frustrated
Then you won't have so much time spent in procrastination

Everything you're mad about not having
Is not worth breaking windows and self-stabbing

You could become something greater than what you are
And not have to struggle to make money to buy a car

There are people that love you and will be glad to help
You just need to keep control on yourself

I have to write to my 9 year old self, the year that made me sane and I hate it to this day. I went from a loved evil person, to a creepy alone person.

Dear DC,

Don't hurt yourself trying
Alone is where you're at
Let them call you Devil's Child
Your friends have your back

In a few years,
Your confidence is gone
All that you've lost can never be won
Your gang man style turns into a pitiful poet
A voic that'll be left unspoken
And you're not even good at it

That free as the birds
Your going to hate yourself
Don't listen to the words

"I know you have potential"
Leave that teacher be
Remember,
She's the one that made me,
Me.

With the regret of a thousand years,
                                                                Unknown Emo

Late Teenage Years


Wipe them tears
get up and move on
life is to short
to waste time
live your life
like is your last
forget him
he didn't deserve you,
the next one will come
and love you.

Getting high in bathrooms
used to be so cool
holding the joint
Lana del Ray style
as he blew smoke circles
and I played out my own
  Tragedy
so dramatic and glamorous
to my stoned eyes
blowing smoke at my reflection
recollection taints this cool
cool looses its definition
when you remember the numbness
the hateful face
looking back at you in the mirror
sleeping pills hovering as an option
to end the way
he looked at you
the way that "he" meant every man
because you belonged to all of them
and none of them
you could never decide which it was
Was it the smoke that made you disregard life
was it the loss of self
the way you took a swig
To just stop thinking
vodka slipping feeling into numbness
turning you back into
the girl who didn't give a shit
All I want to do is hold you
say baby
it will end
stop thinking you can't say no
stop thinking that the world owns you
that you are a slave to words
this body is yours
It is your skin, your ass, your heart
And they don't get to touch you
like your trash
You will be happy
You will be happy
I you just realize
You are yours.

I wish to apologize to you of young
Shouldn't lash at you with rage
for who all my problems I've hung
I don't claim myself a sage...

..... Who am I to judge?.....


Who am I to judge your past?
What situations caused you scandal?
Why do our thoughts contrast?
How I react to things you handle

Who am I to say you are weak?
What I say about you being wrong
Why your actions I critique
How I anger for your not being strong

Who am I to deprive you of your pain?
What right do I have to belittle?
Why do I question your sane?
How your emotions are so brittle

Who am I to call you crazy?
What discern for the paths you follow
Why I claim your growth to be hazy
How I mock that you’re emotionally hollow

Who am I to say I’m right
What you do is ignorant
Why with your thoughts I fight
How towards you my thoughts malignant

Are my own thoughts a sham?
Who am I to judge who I am?

Ri-Hani

You have no idea how I miss you, how I long to reclaim the innocence taken from you.

You're nine years old. Right now your biggest problems are that you have a horrible math teacher and your friends are all thinner than you, and for that I truly envy you. Even you in your vast naivety understand that you have a good life, you have your whole future ahead of you with what feels like no interruptions. I wish I could say that that part lasts forever.

You're coming to a transition that is as neccessary as it is evil, but I'm afraid that there's no way to avoid it. What lies ahead of you will shape you into the woman you will ultimately become, not all of it is bad in fact you're going to love discovering yourself, but the bad things are very bad just as the good things are very good.

The easiest part of your life is drawing to a close. You will from this point forward no longer be afforded the leniency granted to an innocent child. You will have to take on more responsibility than you could possibly imagine and carry more pain than you'd think possible to survive. Survive you will. You will find yourself growing stronger with each passing day. With each challenge will come a new lesson, and with each new lesson you will come to understand yourself and the world more and more.

The path ahead of you is rough and I myself have not yet reached the end of it, but the things that are in store are more breathtaking and magnificent than you have ever dreamed.

My oy request to you as you take this road is to love yourself and accept the things you can not change. I have wasted many a night crying for what will never be and I hope to what ever power is listening that you don't make the same mistake.

Good luck.
Ri-Hani

These are all amazing

To Me,

If I am correct you are now 25, married and have two beautiful children to love and support. I want you to forgive and forget your past. Forgive and forget everything that was done to you. Forgive and forget the abuse, the neglect, the emotional pain suffered through infant eyes for such a long time without your pleas being heard. Forgive and forget that it ever happened and never waste time feeling sorry for yourself. Live in the now and enjoy every spare minute that you have with your children. Take the time to steer them in the right direction and make sure that they know how much they are loved. Love your wife more than you have ever loved anyone on this earth. Tell her how much you love her everyday and show her that you are grateful that she is there for you. Ask her how you can make her life with you easier and happier so that she can see how much you care. Do everything in your power to keep this family together.
Kill those demons in your head that make you doubt everything that you do and rob you of your confidence. You are able to accomplish more than you think you can. Believe in yourself and remember you are just human like anyone else. We all make mistakes. We are not perfect. Ask for forgiveness when you make a mistake and forgive when your partner makes one too. Help her up and she will in turn will help you up when you fall.

dear seventeen
don't ever stop writing
you'll go insane