Poetry competition CLOSED 30th January 2014 5:37am
WINNER
KittyFromHell
KittyFromHell
RUNNERS-UP:
Page_Writer
and Dirtfarm
Page:
Someone Who Looks Like Me
Poetry Contest Description
Full Explanation Below.
I want to see how others deal, cope, acknowledge, etc, with the fact that they have a biological parent/sibling whom they didn't know existed most of their lives. Write any style. Poetry, prose, anything, but please be descriptive, not encryptive. I want to know how you really feel. Please, if this is not something that has happened to you, you are welcome to make something up as if it were real to you. Also, PLEASE ADD AT THE END OF YOUR WORK IF IT IS FICTON, OR NON-FICTION... THANK YOU.
Castle Down
I was concieved in a tube.
Sperm and egg met in strange, exchange.
Father & Mother agreed to disagree.
Have me, the deed and then leave, leave, leave.
My mother raised me as her own.
And my father went to be someone that I would never, ever know.
But here I am seventeen years.
Lived in two different towns.
Watched my mother remarried, not a man but a woman instead.
With a son and plenty of baggage of her own.
And still I see. . .
I see that parts of me that belong.
And the parts that are missing from my existence.
My hair was wavey, my mom's made of wild curls.
Her's was light brown, mine was a shade lighter then the night sky.
I was hyper and loud, talkative and crazy.
Sometimes I said things that I didn't mean to say.
My mother thought things through until they made sense.
I jumped in head first and sometimes forgot the bungee chord.
But still I grew up.
Few friends because I was walking, talking science experiment.
Without the super human powers or avian hybrid wings.
My eyes were hazel, my mother were brown.
My face held the same slenderness, but my eyes were more round.
The girl on the TV show said boys look like their mothers.
And girls look like their father.
So who do I look like then?
If the one I am meant to look like is my dad?
I love my mother, I love her to death.
But she doesn't understand, my life is a castle.
And it's about to be torn down, down, down.
Down to the ground, bricks falling into a crumble heap all around.
Because after seventeen years.
Here I stand.
My birthday.
For the first time about to meet my dad.
Who said my mother was brave for having me alone.
I was her bravery she said.
And so she named me a name that means Valour.
An act of bravery shown during a battle.
I've been battling with myself all my life.
Not knowing how to talk and comminicate with guys.
And to find out, to find out, to find out all along.
The man that is my father, this long lost father of mine.
Is the same man from my too small of town, whose son just died?
Killed himself in vain, this brother of mine that I will never know.
Because I was the girl without the dad.
The girl kept faraway.
I want to be apart of this family.
But I don't how now.
I love my mother and my father, and the truth is I want to love my brother.
But I don't know how, this long lost brother of mine.
So I had a half-brother and a father whom cared for me.
After seventeen years, it feels like it was meant to be.
A spare I am called in the eyes of the masses.
Replacing the dead son, like some lenses in some new glasses.
I am not a replacement, a spare or a back-up plan.
I never asked to be born and raised a certain way.
I just want to be normal.
And so I wil smille and wake up every day.
Take your cruel words that destroy who I am.
But you don't understand, none of you know what it's like.
To wake up one day and finally see, the missing pieces finally fall into place.
My hair, my eyes, my height, my laugh, my nervous quirks.
All came from this man, this man that I call "Dad".
And sure he missed me grow up, fall down and get back up.
But he's here now and that's all that I need.
Him to care for me now and tell me about the brother I will never know.
Be there for me.
And watch me learn, shine and grow.
I lived in a castle, a castle that soared so high.
Above cities, landscapes and oceans so wide.
A castle that on the top of that peak I sat.
Until I realized that I didn't know half of who I was.
Half of who I am.
And now I do.
And that's where I stand.
Not a spare, not a replacement, not a back-up plan.
No, my castle was torn down.
And there was alot of pain that had to be scraped away.
To find the battered rose of my soul.
Inside of the pile of rubble that I called my life.
And now I am reborn from these tragedies, secrets and dreams.
And I can finally see who I was meant to be.
And who is other half in making me, into me.
This poem is fiction and is based of the main character named Valeri, to my novel, Castle Down that I am writing currently. The fact that I found this competition is actually quite ironic considering I've been writing a story about a girl that was a product of artifical insemenation or in vitro fertalization. And then on her 17th birthday she finally meets her father, whom is also the father of the local boy whom commited suicide two books earlier in the series known as The Secret House Saga. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed my poem because I had fun writing it.
-Paige Rider
I was concieved in a tube.
Sperm and egg met in strange, exchange.
Father & Mother agreed to disagree.
Have me, the deed and then leave, leave, leave.
My mother raised me as her own.
And my father went to be someone that I would never, ever know.
But here I am seventeen years.
Lived in two different towns.
Watched my mother remarried, not a man but a woman instead.
With a son and plenty of baggage of her own.
And still I see. . .
I see that parts of me that belong.
And the parts that are missing from my existence.
My hair was wavey, my mom's made of wild curls.
Her's was light brown, mine was a shade lighter then the night sky.
I was hyper and loud, talkative and crazy.
Sometimes I said things that I didn't mean to say.
My mother thought things through until they made sense.
I jumped in head first and sometimes forgot the bungee chord.
But still I grew up.
Few friends because I was walking, talking science experiment.
Without the super human powers or avian hybrid wings.
My eyes were hazel, my mother were brown.
My face held the same slenderness, but my eyes were more round.
The girl on the TV show said boys look like their mothers.
And girls look like their father.
So who do I look like then?
If the one I am meant to look like is my dad?
I love my mother, I love her to death.
But she doesn't understand, my life is a castle.
And it's about to be torn down, down, down.
Down to the ground, bricks falling into a crumble heap all around.
Because after seventeen years.
Here I stand.
My birthday.
For the first time about to meet my dad.
Who said my mother was brave for having me alone.
I was her bravery she said.
And so she named me a name that means Valour.
An act of bravery shown during a battle.
I've been battling with myself all my life.
Not knowing how to talk and comminicate with guys.
And to find out, to find out, to find out all along.
The man that is my father, this long lost father of mine.
Is the same man from my too small of town, whose son just died?
Killed himself in vain, this brother of mine that I will never know.
Because I was the girl without the dad.
The girl kept faraway.
I want to be apart of this family.
But I don't how now.
I love my mother and my father, and the truth is I want to love my brother.
But I don't know how, this long lost brother of mine.
So I had a half-brother and a father whom cared for me.
After seventeen years, it feels like it was meant to be.
A spare I am called in the eyes of the masses.
Replacing the dead son, like some lenses in some new glasses.
I am not a replacement, a spare or a back-up plan.
I never asked to be born and raised a certain way.
I just want to be normal.
And so I wil smille and wake up every day.
Take your cruel words that destroy who I am.
But you don't understand, none of you know what it's like.
To wake up one day and finally see, the missing pieces finally fall into place.
My hair, my eyes, my height, my laugh, my nervous quirks.
All came from this man, this man that I call "Dad".
And sure he missed me grow up, fall down and get back up.
But he's here now and that's all that I need.
Him to care for me now and tell me about the brother I will never know.
Be there for me.
And watch me learn, shine and grow.
I lived in a castle, a castle that soared so high.
Above cities, landscapes and oceans so wide.
A castle that on the top of that peak I sat.
Until I realized that I didn't know half of who I was.
Half of who I am.
And now I do.
And that's where I stand.
Not a spare, not a replacement, not a back-up plan.
No, my castle was torn down.
And there was alot of pain that had to be scraped away.
To find the battered rose of my soul.
Inside of the pile of rubble that I called my life.
And now I am reborn from these tragedies, secrets and dreams.
And I can finally see who I was meant to be.
And who is other half in making me, into me.
This poem is fiction and is based of the main character named Valeri, to my novel, Castle Down that I am writing currently. The fact that I found this competition is actually quite ironic considering I've been writing a story about a girl that was a product of artifical insemenation or in vitro fertalization. And then on her 17th birthday she finally meets her father, whom is also the father of the local boy whom commited suicide two books earlier in the series known as The Secret House Saga. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed my poem because I had fun writing it.
-Paige Rider
Laying in bed wondering
Who am I ?
Was given up at birth
No one seem to care for me
Lived in twelve orphanages
Beaten
Molested
Abused
By people who were
suppose to love me
Cried
And cried
Myself to sleep
Numerous times
Wishing that someone
Would rescue me from my
Hard life
And depression
Mom
Dad
Where are you?
Why did you leave me
Alone in this cold world?
Was I a burden to you
That you thought life
Would be much better
If I had just disappeared
From your life?
Sometimes I stare into
strangers
faces wondering
Could that be my mom?
Could that be the woman
Who gave me life?
But dragged my world from me
In seconds of my birth
My mind seem to get
The better of me
When my remembrance
Takes me back in the womb
Hearing your laughter
And your lullabies
Now I'm just a useless
Piece of shit
That everyone
Just wipe their feet
And drag mud upon
Is there a better life for me
Would I ever stop feeling
the pain and emptiness
I feel inside?
Would I ever find a family
Who would really love Me?
Too many questions
Flood my mind
Every second
Every minute
Every hour
Of the fucking day
I just want to be
Free from this
Mental slavery
And craziness
In my head
Night after night
After night
Are you happy without my smiles?
Without my presence?
Without my touch?
And without my love ?
Promise I would be of
no burden to your lives
Just tell me why did you
Not care for me enough
To love me
Why did you treat me like
the enemy?
Mummy !
Daddy!
Why didn't you love Me?
Non fiction . Was just inspired by so many
Stories of abandonment in this world.
Thank You!!
Who am I ?
Was given up at birth
No one seem to care for me
Lived in twelve orphanages
Beaten
Molested
Abused
By people who were
suppose to love me
Cried
And cried
Myself to sleep
Numerous times
Wishing that someone
Would rescue me from my
Hard life
And depression
Mom
Dad
Where are you?
Why did you leave me
Alone in this cold world?
Was I a burden to you
That you thought life
Would be much better
If I had just disappeared
From your life?
Sometimes I stare into
strangers
faces wondering
Could that be my mom?
Could that be the woman
Who gave me life?
But dragged my world from me
In seconds of my birth
My mind seem to get
The better of me
When my remembrance
Takes me back in the womb
Hearing your laughter
And your lullabies
Now I'm just a useless
Piece of shit
That everyone
Just wipe their feet
And drag mud upon
Is there a better life for me
Would I ever stop feeling
the pain and emptiness
I feel inside?
Would I ever find a family
Who would really love Me?
Too many questions
Flood my mind
Every second
Every minute
Every hour
Of the fucking day
I just want to be
Free from this
Mental slavery
And craziness
In my head
Night after night
After night
Are you happy without my smiles?
Without my presence?
Without my touch?
And without my love ?
Promise I would be of
no burden to your lives
Just tell me why did you
Not care for me enough
To love me
Why did you treat me like
the enemy?
Mummy !
Daddy!
Why didn't you love Me?
Non fiction . Was just inspired by so many
Stories of abandonment in this world.
Thank You!!
Anonymous
Thoughts on a lost sister, now found
It's not your fault
he simply threw you away
just rejected DNA
laying dormant
and without purpose
and Daddy didn't love enough
or care to not discard your charm
on grounds of womanhood,
and how dare you
not be able to carry the family name
even though that name
is tainted with the shame
of what he did.
You cannot be blamed, dear flower,
that you contemplated each decade
with puzzled fixation;
the dull and distant loss
of which I cannot imagine
burned deeply in your eyes
when he had passed on,
and we all silently knew.
What a crime, that favour lay
so provocatively in your quest,
your doorstep painted
with bruised shades of regret.
You were half of him, and half of her
confined to letters on a shelf.
Wholly yourself.
(An old poem based on when my grandfather died and my father found out he had a sister in a box of paperwork found in his wardrobe. We have since located her and now have a good relationship.)
It's not your fault
he simply threw you away
just rejected DNA
laying dormant
and without purpose
and Daddy didn't love enough
or care to not discard your charm
on grounds of womanhood,
and how dare you
not be able to carry the family name
even though that name
is tainted with the shame
of what he did.
You cannot be blamed, dear flower,
that you contemplated each decade
with puzzled fixation;
the dull and distant loss
of which I cannot imagine
burned deeply in your eyes
when he had passed on,
and we all silently knew.
What a crime, that favour lay
so provocatively in your quest,
your doorstep painted
with bruised shades of regret.
You were half of him, and half of her
confined to letters on a shelf.
Wholly yourself.
(An old poem based on when my grandfather died and my father found out he had a sister in a box of paperwork found in his wardrobe. We have since located her and now have a good relationship.)
They say there’s gold in them thar hills
found out early that I was missing that hollow muscular organ
old man’s motto to everything was” it’s along way from your heart son rub some dirt on it”
I wondered if it was the beer and whiskey talking or did he really know best
could have just been filling the void after mom disappeared into the local crack house
whispers would emerge from time to time when she was spotted on 140 Pine Street
heard the bitch passed a year before my old man’s liver shut down
it’s all hard to grasp when your 14
my aunt handled me and the situation the best she knew how
doctors always helped, they knew just what pills to prescribe
I think of my dad some mornings when I’m on the way to work
would be nice to share a cold one and discuss the daily grind with him
remembering his motto I move on
should know not all are placed on the path to redemption
some have to carve it through the fucking mountains
life is easier when you can watch it from your perch
but when the tree is cut down
the only thing you’re left with is your thoughts and memories
I often wonder if my name crossed her lips as she drew that last breath
or was it just the warmth of that glass dick as it set her free
found out early that I was missing that hollow muscular organ
old man’s motto to everything was” it’s along way from your heart son rub some dirt on it”
I wondered if it was the beer and whiskey talking or did he really know best
could have just been filling the void after mom disappeared into the local crack house
whispers would emerge from time to time when she was spotted on 140 Pine Street
heard the bitch passed a year before my old man’s liver shut down
it’s all hard to grasp when your 14
my aunt handled me and the situation the best she knew how
doctors always helped, they knew just what pills to prescribe
I think of my dad some mornings when I’m on the way to work
would be nice to share a cold one and discuss the daily grind with him
remembering his motto I move on
should know not all are placed on the path to redemption
some have to carve it through the fucking mountains
life is easier when you can watch it from your perch
but when the tree is cut down
the only thing you’re left with is your thoughts and memories
I often wonder if my name crossed her lips as she drew that last breath
or was it just the warmth of that glass dick as it set her free
To Be Honest...
To my mother I am her baby girl
The last she ever brought into this world
But she was a dark presence
Took away slivers of my innocence
Her mouth speaks utterances of love
Yet she knows
That tongue has been to places
She should’ve never dared to go
To my father I am his eldest daughter
First born preceding younger half brothers
Product of his youthful stupidity in life
When he knocked up and wifed
A troubled woman who is nothing but strife
Yet he tries
To take back the events
When he had nothing for me but goodbye
To the ones who raised me
Scolded, loved, and nurtured me
They were far from flawless
Sometimes strict, sometimes careless
But they were life’s best offer
I am their spoiled rotten grandchild
Youngest, and raised like an only
Now in teen years going crazy and buck wild
To lost and found siblings
The elder shared similar and worse abusings
At the hand and mouth of my mother
Yet didn't treat me as a bother
Rather spoke to me as an equal
The younger ones and I fought
Hated each other for awhile
Yet animosity, we always forgot
To myself, if I spoke truthfully
I am a melting pot of insanity
Hot Filipino blood runs true
Mississippian roots too
Two sides of anger issues within me
Bipolar feelings overwhelm my mind
So I pour them into music and paper
Dare I call myself one of a kind?
