It turns to rust

Write about something you've lost, and it's decaying and out of your reach,
someone or something it doesn't matter.
A feeling, an emotion, your pride or somewhere you've lived.
It can be anything.

1 poem
As many damn words as you want.
I'll give you a month
Grammar / punctuation isn't that important, so long you write honestly.
Obviously give me something poetic, personification, imagery, onomatopoeia, metaphors. I'm not listing them all.
Go forth and attempt to write.

i pretended that she was god
for a second
so i could hold her worlds of blue hair
and i said to her
while kissing her neck
"i missed this"
and she said
with alcohol in her breath "i missed you
saying that"
and i knew she didn't care for me
and that she didn't care
for anything, especially the fact
that one of my callused hands
grabbed the skin of her
hip as the other rested
on the small of her back
and i pretended
she was god for a second,
so i could hold her blue hair back
as she expelled her night into
the gutter and i said "i missed this"
as i kissed her neck
and she said
as i smelt the alcohol
and vomit in her breath
that she missed me saying that
but i knew she didn't
miss a thing
and what
i've realised
is that
was a very
godly thing
she was
doing
for
me.

Time
I knew of you as a child you were so loving and nurturing and strong to have had 10 children I knew then that you would love me and treat me as one of your own and as time went on you did you were my inspiration for so many things even when I didn't say it
as time went on we became friends and as time because of situations we became distant
But I told myself that I would have time to get back what I lost how you were going to be at my wedding or see me graduate from college but I realize that that will never be because August 5th 2011 happened I love you and I miss you and at times it seems unreal but when I can't call you andandhear your voice than I know its real and I guess I didn't have tim

Beauty is the Beast

She is just another of society’s creations
A beautiful vixen unleashed on the world
Her body burns with perfection
Until her heart is charred a deadly black
Each alteration to hide her flaws
Leaves another crack in her authentic smile
And the glue she uses to fill the gaps
Only puts a bitter taste in her mouth

Once she was a simple girl
Full of promise and hopeful dreams
But like a plague from an unknown hell
The strive for ‘beauty’ broke out
And she was far too weak
It infected and consumed her until
All she was became obliterated

Now as I look into her painted on eyes
I no longer see a hopeful little girl
What I find instead are two open windows
Leading into the back of her mind
Where a collection of endless criticism
Has been tattooed as a painful reminder
Of all of her ungodly imperfections

Watching her stare blankly back at me
Suddenly makes it painfully obvious
That this empty shell of a girl
Will never again hold the soul it once did
And as I press my hand against the cool glass
Examining my reflection for any sign
That it might still be there
I finally come to terms with the fact
That I have lost the most important thing in my life:
Me

sitting
spinning
swimming
sinking
all the while the clock keeps ticking
seconds swiftly sifting sorrows
from each minute time has borrowed
a longing loner, I lie and linger
on this burning bed of soot and cinder
begging to the sky above
searching for my long lost love

Monster in my house

This night i decide
to be honest
this night i decide
to be brave
this night
i am in the brink
of a building
the one inside my head
it yells at me to
jump
funny how minds work their tricks

So i trigger the memories back
even at my disconnected state
..i sank


You held my little body
You forced me to obey
You spit at my being
and came
at my pain
So many times
every fucking day
Childhood burned
by blood and tears
what did i do
to deserve this?
Such words
ran at my head
repeated
every time
you stared
and
I
knew
you weren't like them
this wasn't what i wanted
the child inside me screamed.


Rape,Molestation,Violation
all of them
they shrink to what you did
you monster,
you devil,
you made me cry
then,
and i cry now
but i don't feel sad
this is what i need
for the building to come back

so i run
and run
and run
losing life
with every step
blisters forming
blood opens at
my flesh
from murder of my own body
The scars a permanent reminder
i now look upon
for i've lost my future,
and i've lost my past
I hope you're happy

Daddy,
you gave me life
and took it back

http://deepundergroundpoetry.com/images/uploads/poemimages/89604.jpg

LOOSING FAITH

I had a dream I walked the earth    
barefoot I stepped on broken glass    
above my head the sky was black    
the dark clouds rained down sheets of blood red paper,    
a propagandic message announcing a warning to the good citizens of this country    
 
""CITIZENS, AS YOUR GOVERNMENT WE MUST INFORM YOU OF AN EVIL. AN EVIL THAT WEARS A MASK OF GOODNESS AND CARING.  THEY WILL TELL YOU THAT YOU ARE OPPRESSED. THAT YOU HAVE NO CONTROL OVER YOUR OWN LIVES. THAT YOU ARE BEING LIED TO AND DECEIVED. WE MUST PROTECT YOU FROM THIS, FOR YOUR OWN GOOD. WE MUST STOP THIS DEADLY SCOURGE THAT IS SPREADING DISCORD AMONG YOU. WE MUST TAKE DRASTIC MEASURES AGAINST THE THREAT THAT IS INFILTRATING OUR GOOD PEOPLE. AS YOUR GOVERNMENT, WE ASK YOU TO TRUST US TO DO WHAT WE FEEL IS IN YOUR BEST INTEREST. AS A NATION, TRUST THAT WE WILL STAMP OUT THIS EVIL THAT THREATENS THE VERY SAFETY AND INTEGRITY OF EVERY MAN, WOMAN AND CHILD OF THIS GREAT NATION WHILE USING EXCESSIVE ACTS OF VIGILANTISM AND TERRORISM UNDER A GUISE OF HUMAN RIGHTS ACTIVISM. WE WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS. WE WILL TAKE NO PRISONERS"    
 
I stood gazing at the black sun    
contemplating this message of an oppressed people.    
I bowed my head walking the streets of this once great country, shuffling my feet through dreams in the guise of litter    
the stench of lies assailing my nostrils made me wretch.    
I saw crowds of faces blackened with hidden truths which would never be said out loud,    
eyes devoid of the dignity that is the god given right of every human.    
The dignity that comes from having the free will to decide for ourselves what is in our best interest.    
I walk past a college where the only light that can be seen comes from computers, the screens flashing red, the same thing over and over.    
 
THE MESSAGE.    
 
I walk past homes and see this same red screen flashing from televisions thru darkened windows.      
Who knew how the deprivation of free choice could destroy so completely and relentlessly?      
I drop to my knees, feeling devoid of my humanity, tears of the forlorn dripping off my face, hitting the dead lawn and puddling  florescent white  in the shape of faces.    
A glimmer of hope instantly hits me behind my eyes, sparkling in the form of these same faces.    
It feels as if I've known these faces my entire life.    
I lift my head to the sky and wake from my dream.    
I'm so happy it was only a dream,    
I situp quickly and to my surprise these same florescent sparks shoot in front of my eyes.    
As my eyes clear,I realize these white flashes are coming from my computer screen in the form of    
A  person masked in white is sending out a different message of hope and promises to the people of this great nation.  
 
The message?    
 
KNOWLEDGE IS FREE    
 
WE ARE ANONYMOUS      
WE ARE LEGION    
WE DO NOT FORGIVE    
WE DO NOT FORGET    
EXPECT US    
WE WILL PROTECT YOUR FUTURE    
 
And I smiled.

Regret

Every promise broke
hidden in the lies you spoke
the truth you  forgot to tell
when I found out, you heard me yell
though anger grows in peaceful bliss
and your lips and still the ones to kiss
I noticed that more we seem to fight
even further from the light
leaving behind my breath
that speaks of dreams I left
holding on to love we share
the less your eyes seem to care
is it true, our futures dead?
empty  lies fill up my head
how could I forget
the pain that lingers with regret
Please put me in forgetful sleep
with secrets I will forever keep
memories of hands made just for you
the times I felt your love was true
once I saw our love had slipped
I knew my heart would now be ripped
and I wished for something new
yet I still missed me with you
Till I remembered in my head
“I love you” was never said.
How could I have missed
the feeling lacked within your kiss?
Your secrets always make me cry
and leave me helpless, why should I try?
yet my voice still whispers in your ear
in your dreams, you’ll find me here
but only I am in love still
your hardened heart has left me chill
I lose myself in winters sleep
as frosty tears freeze on my cheek
I hope this time I can forget
and live my life without regret.

Unsettled Dream

We don't speak..
for time has placed
a fortress between us...


But

Still I think of you.




like a fading mirage..

a fragmented memory
of a dream that ocurred
so long ago...

a dusty pile
where fire once blazed,
but
has long since been put out.



Faint and fading

like scars you once traced

brushed with lips petal
perfect...


Teased with eyes the color
of skies

holding the promise of an incoming storm.

Memories of a gentle hand
within my own..

The beat of a heart
silently cracking
beneath my tear streaked face...


Over and over again.




Rooms echoing
the shattering of glass..

The screams of the betrayed..

The pain of restless souls
that once upon a time
sought ot comfort within the confines
of one anothers arms.


Sometimes before drifting off
into the depths of another restless sleep..

I gaze at the soft blinking of
stars and see your name spelled
out within the sky..

always with that promise

of incoming storms.






Sadness settles within my bones..

but i'd never reach out to you

too much like running after mirages..



I know in my heart I would come so
far..

blink

than you would be gone again..

fading steady across the horizon..




Washed out in

pink

purple

and

fiery orange.





Those fuckin eyes of yours

How theyd pull me in
just long enough to drown me
in the current.

Drifting out
to be pulled
back..

again
and
again.



I loved.....


the idea of you.

Fantasies of running away

towards fairy tale endings..


Endless kisses...


Something gentle
Something torn.


My constant need to fix

stitch and sew

something perfect within your vision..


Im broken
Im sorry
I miss you...

But i'll always be out of grsp

just as you are.





Time has turned you into a stranger

always fading


like a mirage


the darkness after the storm


a unsettled dream.

I found my gold.
Buried so low.
South untold;
I hid my treasure.
We wont last
without a sacred path.
A holy map.
A lift to heaven.

    I myself am not me

In dream,I make out with my former self.
A noble man indeed.
Emotional heavy petting.
The love leaking from stretching seams.
He was a faithful man,
an inspiration.
It got to the point,
no other could save him.
Addiction has pushed
every heart away.
Desperation a slow,chemical decay.
So while I move to second base,
my former self swats my hand away.
I open my eyes,not surprised to see.
A skeleton,the unfortunate me.

A lost father.
   
My beautiful angel. Only three feet and on the top of my list for staying sober. All i need from you is to keep smiling, so i can in return, and stop these childish actions that keep me lost to you.
I'm mad at myself for letting a handful of bite-sized feel goods come in the way of me holding you. I'm angry that my past will hinder me from a future with you. As your green eyes stare at me in a captured kodak moment i wish i was looking through the lens. I didn't want to walk away from the most important responsibility i was supposed to carry on with, but once again my selfishness has intervened with my happiness. I want to push you for the first time without training wheels, and as you laugh with excitement, my tears flow with enjoyment and I'm stuck wishing with fear that it wasn't just a day dream. As i look with shame, at my hands, i think of how yours would fit perfectly into my palm. I just hope you realize i love every moment we are together. My thoughts race, and like most circuits, its around you, circling and circling with no checker line. I'm mad at myself for losing my chance at being a father for a feeling that i didn't win at anything chasing. I want a relationship with you just as much as i want sobriety. I don't want to lose either ever again. I'm lost in a memory.I'm lost in addiction. And my daughter has lost a father.

Slowly, endlessly, the pain creeps through me
Sudden realization hits hard, as I see it slowly fade away
The bittersweet memory burst through my mind like a wrecking ball
Down on my knees, falling slowly, in and out of sanity
It whispers in my ear, the words burn like acid through my mind

I walk a road forbidden by laws of physics, a path fading from view
A trap to all I walk in fear of losing it once more
People walk past and stare as I fall to the ground yelling
I've lost it so many times, and once more shall it leave me
Helplessly I wonder the streets, lost in an ocean of uncertainty

The trees crumble from my view, the path I walk shattered
A sky once beautiful shade of blue now a grey that suffocates me
My hands fall to my side from being stuck to my chest as if to hide me

Once again it's back, taunting me, controlling me
A smile once glued on my face, now ripped from my soul
Ruined am I by what I loose, yet still here

I hide in a corner of a small room, freeing myself from the judges outside
They shall never know what it's like
Like to loose it, what keeps us here, safe and sound

My mind fills with pain, knowledge that it will be the end of all
Suffering from the thoughts my mind gives
Suffering from the view my mind gives me
It's about time, I know
It's gone, as so the time shall tell
I know this is it, it has been to long, to long since I've see realities ghost

I know now for sure that I have lost it
I have lost my sanity

The Last Rites

I thrust my tongue      
deep into your mouth      
to feel the cold taste of dust      
choking on eternity    
   
I gazed hard into your eyes,      
searching for a spark    
some recognition      
lingering from the soul    
but all I saw      
was my own scared reflection      
settling on the glassy stare      
of a stranger    
   
Gently,      
I brushed the hair from your cheek    
begging your lips for a smile    
but your head only jerked      
then lolled to one side    
staring vacantly      
towards the clock on the bedside table    
   
I wanted to tear off your jeans    
and bury myself in your thighs    
to hear you moan    
while I felt you shudder and cry    
to tell you I was sorry    
that I hadn't been there for you    
to say how much I loved you    
a final time    
and how I would love you      
always and forever    
   
But there was no forever    
and always was a lie    
from now on    
there would be only this moment    
swallowing the rest of my life    
the cruelest reminder    
ripping out my own dead    
heart.

Its   the  right   time   for  me  to  let  it   go
My  hope   is  dead   and  my  courage   is  gone
You  have    proved   to  me  that  you   hate   me   and  that’s  all
Enough   reason    for  me  to  stop.

All  I  did   for  you   was   useless
I’m   still   to  find  out  why    you  were   so  ruthless
This  love  thing   wasn’t  insane, it  was   my  true   sense
But  above   all  I    had  to   quit  and say   deuces.

I   want  to  tell   you   that  I’m  doing  good
Although  my  happiness  isn’t  the   way  it  should
I  made   a  mistake   falling  for   you
I   got   nothing  as   if    I   was   clown   and  a   fool.

Today   my  flow   is  going  to  be   deeper
You  broke  my  heart   and  left  me  in   blisters
I   have   been  tortured   by  your  wickedness  schemes  ma
Believe   me   that’s   right  they  made  me   a  winner.

I’m  the   best   because   of  your  hate
I  used   to   cry   thanks  to  my  pen
x-lover    go  away   to  hell
I  don’t  need  you  again,fuck  any  gain  I  could   have  obtained