Poetry competition CLOSED 24th December 2012 5:27pm
View Profile Poems by Whitewand6
RUNNER-UP: DystopianMelody


That Elevator

Fire of Insight
United States 4awards
Joined 21st Feb 2012
Forum Posts: 983

Poetry Contest

Write a poem about taking an elevator somewhere, whether to a floor in a building or to Heaven above and then Hell below.

- If you comment in this thread, I disqualify you for my competition. So, here's my advice, post your poem then compliment someone through a message.
- 2 poems per poet, however long or old.
- Collabs allowed, but counts as poem per poet.
- Use your imagination.
- You have two weeks.


Dangerous Mind
India 16awards
Joined 1st Nov 2011
Forum Posts: 2251


neath the slow whirring fan
i sit unambiguous with
a disquiet hung above
like rings of saturn

i stare at my coffee mug
a black hole stares back
fluid animate unapologetic
none of us collapse in ages
to my utter disappointment

i lie down on the soiled mattress
munch on yesterday's pizza crust
spitshine as the blonde gags audibly
my grip tightens as lifeforce gurgles
eyes close in a blur of saline white

neath the slow whirring fan
i stand unperturbed
as two kids fight
one of them shoves
the other pretty hard
reprisal of the role they
have been playing at school
the victim loses his balance
crashing against me before mumbling
an apology as the elevator stops there
and then akin divine intervention

suspended mid air we all take turns
in staring at each other  
hoping hopeless
screaming silent
sweating cold

the bully pinches the whiny hard
resulting in a flurry of blows and
it gets uglier with more shoves
i finally step in and try to pry
left with no choice i shove
the bully to one corner as
he thrashes in rage like
an apache boy caught
in the quagmire

he must weigh over a hundred
and fifty giving me that fight

i try to stop the other one with
my forearm pressed to his collarbone
as he stares hard at his nemesis fighting
to free himself and get his revenge today
tears streaming cheeks flushed breath ragged

they grunt thrash kick flail for an eternity
out of the lack of will i dont open my mouth
knowing the vanity of words inside the steel box

suddenly the small one manages to break free
and i shove him again to the corner when he steps
on the bottom of his large trousers while spreading his legs

the elevator door suddenly opens and voices flash lights seep in

looking up i hear a collective gasp and urgent murmurs

the weak victim feels cold and frozen against my forearm
he stands naked gaze down ass glued to the cold steel

i smell shit in the air

Lost Thinker
United States 1awards
Joined 4th Dec 2012
Forum Posts: 39

Elevator Woe

When I first awoke
I did not know that
Yesterday the elevator broke.

So without hesitation
I stepped inside and
Did not hear anyone's exclamation.

The doors slid shut
And locked me within;
I pressed the Up button, but....

A terrible sound as the cable snapped,
A sinking feeling as gravity let go,
Inside this falling room I am trapped.

A terrible stain on the basement's mat,
The mess that was made was awfully grand;
Here is where my life is "fin";
Here is the end of my elevator woe.

Thought Provoker
United States
Joined 14th Dec 2012
Forum Posts: 93

a simple crash and an explosion
led me to a hall
so white
so bright
i look to my right
to my left
and the hall had
no end
no start
no beginning
nor end but
in front of me was an elevator
i pushed the button and the
doors opened wide
i stepped in and the doors
i looked around me
and stumbled to the floor
the elevator was glass and i
could see through the
and the bottom
above me all white and gold
oh below
was firey lava
i chuckled and pushed the up button
but the button
would not light
and the elevator gave a
and descended down
and on my way down
i saw every sin
i have ever committed
me cheating on my husband
me leaving my family
me drinking my pains
a single tear fell from my face
and the doors opened
i knew i deserved this fate
to i spread my arms wide
and jumped

Dangerous Mind
United Kingdom 9awards
Joined 9th Dec 2012
Forum Posts: 1391

Smoke rises, uncaged birds will fly away and doors will open, that's just the way things always seem to go

The wind of her arrival ripples tediums dark waters. Music plays, in minds or ears, neither seems to know

As they rise, possibilities rise with them. Eyes meet and lips quirk, cheeks begin to glow

Gentle sighs and murmured 'Hi's' may this time  lead to something more, in silent soil nothing likes to grow

Music stops, their hearts drop, landing with a ping. Gazes slip
away as smoke does, lingering and slow

The smoke rose, the uncaged birds soared free, doors opened and as they always seem to do, slowly swing closed. Footprints made in  minds, are ones you cannot show

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