Poetry competition CLOSED 22nd October 2012 2:43pm
WINNER
DiamondDustMirror (The White Rabbit)
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RUNNERS-UP: jctmme112092 and cjmshadow

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Regrets in life

pedroe281
Strange Creature
Joined 5th Oct 2012
Forum Posts: 3

Poetry Contest

I want to see how people express their regrets
Hi I'm Interested in the way people express their past mistakes and if it helped them for the better or worse

What i will look in a poem will be:

- Make the reader feel the poem
- 2 piece limit per entrant.

What i will judge too

- Vocabulary & grammar.
- Voice, style & tone.
- Strength of storyline.
- Strength of closing.

shaunda
Fire of Insight
United States 13awards
Joined 19th Sep 2012
Forum Posts: 261

this sounds interesting. I will do one tonight when I get home from work. Thanx

Kaatho
Thought Provoker
New Zealand
Joined 11th July 2012
Forum Posts: 2

(removed)

DrearyAvenue
Niko
Twisted Dreamer
United States 5awards
Joined 15th Sep 2012
Forum Posts: 71

It is my regret that I let this person go, that I didn't persue them. That I failed them, so I wrote this song for them...

All Because Of

I have loved you more than ever.
Fields of green forever.
Daisies put in my hair,
All because of...
You are the one I've been missing.
Your love and sweet kissing.
Most tender of touches,
All because of...

My life, it's passing by.
Too scared, I close my eyes,
And you're still there.
You save me from my nightmares.

Where have we gotten to baby.
Please don't leave me stranded.
Broken and defeated,
All because of...
My mind's running 'round chaotic.
Lost behind my heartache.
I feel like slipping away,
All because of...

My life, it's passing by.
Too scared, I close my eyes,
But you're not there.
You saved me from my nightmares.

DiamondDustMirror
The White Rabbit
Twisted Dreamer
Malaysia 8awards
Joined 12th June 2012
Forum Posts: 64

Pffft...Parents...
__________________

No matter how many times i forgive,
You'll be sure to break my heart again,
So i won't bother from now on,
All my sympathy has gone.

You were the source of my misery,
That much i figured out,
Why i had to bottle my emotions,
And why my mind is full of doubt.

Why i had to suffer so,
When the bottle overflows,
Why i trusted no one,
No one but darkness thats full of woe.

Lots of times i have thought,
About that one bang and lights going out,
And blades that relieve pain and release ruby liquids,
About eternal sleep where the pain is none.

If it wasn't for my fear of pain,
I wouldn't be here right now,
I could have jumped from the balcony,
In front of a car or a rain of blades...

You refuse to look at what's around you,
Of how many times i had kissed Death's cheek,
Of how he nearly took me under his wing,
After i had fallen asleep.

You don't care, that i already know,
You care about what people say,
Of what you don't have, you regret day by day,
But why oh why must things turn out this way...


Well, i'm sorry i wasn't what you wanted,
I'm sorry for being human,
I'm sorry i wasn't born perfect,
I'm sorry for being born at all...

OctoberArts
October
Fire of Insight
United States 6awards
Joined 14th Nov 2011
Forum Posts: 596

"My World of Contrition"

I regret....

Sorrow
Allowing it to flow onto tomorrow
Happiness
Believing in it's falsified existence
Hatred
Letting it bleed and pulse through me
Love
Toying with my emotions, fooling me

I regret...

Being the brother that didn't die
Waking up everyday I have been alive
Smiling when it wasn't how I felt
Running from any source of help
Thinking anything would ever change
Loving and loving again and again
Helping friends who could careless for me
Bleeding for those who wouldn't bleed for me

I regret...

Time
The good short lived and the bad without end
Questioning
Nothing answered, nothing understood
Dreams
My constant inability to reach them
Wishing
Filling myself with false hope, faded visions

I regret...

My birth, failed existence on earth
My abnormality, everything I failed to be
Loving anyone and anything, except for me
Living when it all feels so wrong
Everything and anything I have ever done
Even now, I regret writing this poem
How I will think and cry over all my decisions
I regret regretting in my world of contrition

pedroe281
Strange Creature
Joined 5th Oct 2012
Forum Posts: 3

DiamondDustMirror said:Pffft...Parents...
__________________

No matter how many times i forgive,
You'll be sure to break my heart again,
So i won't bother from now on,
All my sympathy has gone.

You were the source of my misery,
That much i figured out,
Why i had to bottle my emotions,
And why my mind is full of doubt.

Why i had to suffer so,
When the bottle overflows,
Why i trusted no one,
No one but darkness thats full of woe.

Lots of times i have thought,
About that one bang and lights going out,
And blades that relieve pain and release ruby liquids,
About eternal sleep where the pain is none.

If it wasn't for my fear of pain,
I wouldn't be here right now,
I could have jumped from the balcony,
In front of a car or a rain of blades...

You refuse to look at what's around you,
Of how many times i had kissed Death's cheek,
Of how he nearly took me under his wing,
After i had fallen asleep.

You don't care, that i already know,
You care about what people say,
Of what you don't have, you regret day by day,
But why oh why must things turn out this way...


Well, i'm sorry i wasn't what you wanted,
I'm sorry for being human,
I'm sorry i wasn't born perfect,
I'm sorry for being born at all...

wow this just left me very nice

pedroe281
Strange Creature
Joined 5th Oct 2012
Forum Posts: 3

loving all your guys poems :)

Kou_Indigo
Karam L. Parveen-Ashton
Tyrant of Words
United States 69awards
Joined 15th Sep 2011
Forum Posts: 2802

For Neely…

I loved you so, perhaps more than I should have!
You dried my tears, when my heart was broken.
But we drifted apart, and there was no soft salve,
To ease my soul: to grant it some peaceful token.
I remember your smile, on one golden afternoon,
When I had given you a portrait I painted of you.
Do you still look at it and remember the laughter?
I’ll hope that you do, both now and forever after.

I painted hearts around the borders of the image,
And roses to say what words alone cannot utter.
So subtle, the meaning that can never diminish…
Amidst colors to make a maiden’s eyes to flutter!

I never got the chance to tell you how deep I felt,
The longing for you that was as madness to me…
But it was sweet lunacy, before which I had knelt.
Your eyes: were the images of my secret idolatry!
I wanted to run my fingers through your dark hair,
To whisper into your ears, the things lovers share.
But I will always have one thing above all the rest,
The memory of that day you called me “the best”.

I liken you to Juliet, for I was like your Romeo…
How deep is my sorrow, that tradition parted us!
There was so much, I longed for you to know…
But, this simple poem will suffice, and so it must.

I am not the best of souls, for all souls are flawed…
And towards the light, I have all my life stumbled.
For happiness it seems that I desperately clawed,
Towards the storm, not heeding when it rumbled!
I still walk by the place where we spent the hours,
But it has changed, at the hands of time’s powers.
If you still have the bracelet I gave you wear it oft,
And know that you are not forgotten, maiden soft.

jctmme112092
BluntTrama
Twisted Dreamer
United States 1awards
Joined 24th Jan 2011
Forum Posts: 50

Track marks up and down
I haven't slept in days
Can't stand on my own feet
Vision is nothing but haze

I stick the needle in my vein
And feel a cold chill
I decent into my bed
Nothing is what i feel

It's my baby brothers birthday
I'm no where to be seen
He calls me up in sadness
Begging me to get clean

I'm not exactly sure
How i ended up in the mix
Sold my father Rolex
to get my next fix

It was a present he gave me
On his death bed
" Make me proud son"
Were the last words he said

This dark places I've found
Felt like it had no end
I was alone with out a light
till along came a friend

I suck that needle in my arm
As i do every night
Life i could care less about
i gave up the fight

Tomorrow is my birthday
But I'm not getting older
I'm celebrating the fact
That I'm 4 years sober



kourtnissixxx
Dangerous Mind
12awards
Joined 12th July 2011
Forum Posts: 928

For Lilly... R. I. P.


We were just mindless kids back then  
We lived for adrenalin and welcomed sin  
The rambunctious teens who hated any authority  
Honestly getting fucked up was our only priority  
 
I've grown now but I still struggle with my temptations  
Trying to find my release and ultimate salvation  
Yet I hate myself now more than ever  
Because we were going to do everything together  
 
We just got way to caught up in things and fell into a hole  
You never got to clime out though and it still fills me with sole  
Because I should have been the one six feet under by now  
Instead you unknowingly took my place and I now know how..  
 
Cody kept his word it was really good shit  
But at what coast? your only spirit..?  
I never shouldve left to get high..  
It's so fucked up because I know im the reason you died..  
 
Goddess, I swear I didn't know  
That hes that one who stole  
All the pills from that fucking junkie  
I just thought I'd score from some dumb flunky  
 
Can you ever forgive me where ever you are?  
Are you the eyes watching me in every star?  
I can feel you when your presence is near me..  
Are you trying to tell me it's ok, you've been set free?  
 
Why do you still appear to me in my dreams?  
To replay the moment I realized it was your screams..  
And I can smell the sulfur emanating from the gun..  
I'll never forget the hysteria I felt when I knew you were gone  
 
That was the first time I ever had a bad trip  
All I could understand was the blood that dripped  
And that it was your death that haunted my mind  
Along with the hatred I developed for all of mankind  
 
So why do I still crave for a fix?  
Why did I once degrade myself into turning tricks..  
I had to numb myself from the burden I'll always carry  
That I'm the reason you rode the styx ferry..
 
I never should have left you there  
Alone in a house with people who didn't care..  
But im slowly learning to forgive myself  
With your kind guidance and natures blessed help  
 
I'll never forget you and all the joy you brought me  
So I'm writing this cause I just don't know how else to say I'm sorry  
I practice the old religion just like you once did  
So I can see the way you smiled at me when we were kids  
 
 
.
.
.



But I'll never stop regretting your death my dear friend..

poet Anonymous

The Obligation

Oh ring, you constrict my blood
Where once you perfectly fit my appendage
Now you strangle me to a dismal state
Whereby I suffocate
And drown in the muck of regret

To shed you would be freedom
To do away with the obligation
That I stated aloud, those many years ago
Would find me on a blissfully blank canvas of knowing
That I have nothing left to live for but everything

poet Anonymous

We Only Live Once


My reality faded
with the dying of the light,
My spirit took my soul
and then they both took flight,
But left me far behind
Yet then I share
What was on my mind
When my mind was there.
Then I get weak
My presence has gone
Alone with a mean streak
I'll be diminished before long
Like a seeker I'm determined
To find what I lost
Fear steals away my courage
Like a cold winter frost

There was a trip in a dream
I'd had not so long ago,
and I wonder if this waking life
is merely just a show,
For we're actors on the stage of life
pieces in this puzzle, or game
Walking along the blade of a knife,
Am I different, or just the same?
A wretch I must be
Flotsam adrift in the ocean
Naive about my own pain
No expression of emotion
But the dim light at my true center
Is embedded deep within
And struggles to break free
From it's cage now and again

I've been lost before, in countless ways
But now, I refuse to be numb to all life's pain
Oceans of regret swallowed me whole,
This little game, again, and again
Refuse to feel sorry for this "poor kid"
A man must grow up someday
Finally remember, NOT to forget,
The hidden truth is found, someway
Bring it home to the place I know
What was lost has now been found
It's time to grow up and become
More than a one man show
My gift can't be denied
Because It's all in the vibe, mother!@$%#
Listen carefully, because repeating it is useless
If you can't hear in the first place
The you might as well YouTube this

Kurdt94
Mike K.
Thought Provoker
United States 1awards
Joined 31st Mar 2012
Forum Posts: 27

Regret

Never hating myself enough
The skin that binds is nearly too rough
And if I could’ve ripped it off
I would’ve found a way to stop

Never hiding further in the dark
Where every moment was numbingly stark
And if I could’ve blended within the disguise
Life would’ve been a quick demise

Never pushing you farther away
More and more every painful day
And if I could’ve learned how a heart breaks
I would’ve known how much we both could take

Never allowing myself to forget
Force myself to hold onto regrets
And if I could’ve found a way to pretend
I would’ve regretted my own end

cjmshadow
Poetic Joker
Fire of Insight
United States 10awards
Joined 2nd Apr 2011
Forum Posts: 557

Because of Me

The guilt and regret won't leave my mind as I enter this church for you
All our memories keep swirling through my brain as I sit here on this wooden pew.
I can't bring myself to talk about you; when asked I say I have just one sister
For the pain I feel when I think of you burns within me like a thousand boiling blisters.
I wish I could still say I had two sisters, that I wasn't always the family's "baby"
If only I had been braver and stronger back then, maybe, just maybe,
You, baby sister, would still be here, and I never would've had to say goodbye
But instead I'm at your funeral, and I know it's my fault you're here...I'm the one who let you die.
As your small casket passes by, I can't stop the quivering sobs, or the stream of tears
And my mind forces me again and again to relive that day, like a never ending nightmare.
You were five at the time, and I had just turned eight
We'd been through many foster homes, some halfway decent, others not so great.
But this house was worse than the others; the people were crueler, the beatings more severe
I should've done something in the beginning, maybe begged our workers to take us far away from here.
Yet I did nothing, but instead tried to prepare you for the agonizing days to come
I told you to expect more empty stomachs, and beatings that would leave us numb.
For though I knew this house was worse, I thought we'd survive the same way
We'd listen to the yelling, endure the pain, and hope that tomorrow would be a better day.
Until the day came where our foster father decided to prove me oh so wrong
The day he beat you just a little too much, for just a little too long.
You had tried to take some food from the pantry, for the stomach pains were finally too much to bear
But you were caught by him, and he didn't listen to your pleading or begging, for he simply didn't care.
I thought it was just another beating, and so I stood waiting in the shadows in the hall
I didn't want to make it worse, or get beat myself, so I watched even as he threw you against the wall.
Over and over he beat you with with his fists, and with his belt
And still I waited, praying he'd stop soon, so I could attend to your bruises and your welts.
But he was not himself, but high off of one of the many drugs he had in his secret room
And as the minutes dragged by, I began to feel overwhelmed by a sense of doom.
When his hand reached for the wooden bat his son used for baseball, my heart stopped
I screamed at him, but still watched helplessly as the bat quickly dropped.
I can still hear it in my ears, the crack of the bat as it smashed against your head
I can still see it with my eyes, the sight of your blood splattering against the wall, painting it dark red.
As others saw what had happened and dragged him away, I ran to you, but no matter how hard I tried
I couldn't wake you up, and finally had to admit, that my little sister had just died.
And so here I am, weeks later, staring at your lifeless body, wishing that I could once again see those beautiful blue eyes
Unable to block out all the sorrow and pain, while wondering over and over why.
Why did I do nothing to save you, why did I give in to my fear
This regret is something I know I'll have to live with for the many upcoming years.
With tear filled eyes and a broken heart, I tell you I'm sorry, give you one last kiss, and slowly walk away
Praying that perhaps I'll be forgiven, so that I may see you again in Heaven one day.

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