Poetry competition CLOSED 23rd January 2012 8:35pm
WINNER
siphondarkness (Levi)
siphondarkness (Levi)
RUNNERS-UP:
mjs211
and SilverMoon
suicide poems
u can have rewrites 
p r i s o n b r e a k
Shivering alone
sitting under
the leafless tree
by the deserted brick lane
haunted by primitive ghosts
the wind howling with
their requiems
in my desperate hour
of need
the last drops
of blood
gurgling in farewell bid
I count-breathe-blink
my dried tears smell of
pathos and derangement
so manic and profound that
the washed out moon hides behind
the veil of thick clouds-in atonement
I breathe-blink-count
The scurry of nocturnal lives
seems like a distant rumble
a fresh drop of sweat
t
r
i
c
k
l
e
s
d
o
w
n
my forehead
which seemingly feels
d i s t a n t
and another
f
o
l
l
o
w
s
scorched by
inner fear a n d
outer fever
of volatile trepidation
as the perplexed neurons
collide amongst
(one) (another)
I blink-breathe-count
A rebellious outrage seems
to be underway
with meticulous imperfection
stampede.
rampage.
Picanic('i' don't 'see')
The frozen blood
on the stainless blade
has left a smudge-
an aberration
in the silvery refection
The owl hoots on
the perched branch
an anguished acrimony
in the glint of its eyes
as it watches the spectacle
u n f o l d in cold comfort
The life-force dances inside
the prison-a dance of death
or maybe the dance of joy-
the sheer metaphysical melodrama
I count-blink
The soul on the brink of acquittal
from the soiled asylum
The throbbing inside the skull
now a regular blasting
of sanity and the comatose reality-
i-n-t-e-r-m-i-t-t-e-n-t
Rigor mortis seems
still another eon away (but why?)
I blink
F i n a l l y
the battle ends
so does a life of
dignified misery
meaningless drudgery
senseless camaraderie
soulless scenery
binary. nunnery. slavery.
(Some have named it
salvation
the puritans, suicide
shorthand. shortcut. cut-short.)
The suppressed grin provides
the contrasting antithesis
(or maybe the setting
for an unceremonious departure?)
The commotion ends abruptly
as the motionless body
sits in an enviable trance
The Buddha of suburbia
beneath the wizened tree
the chakras ceased
the prana free
The chaos of life giving way
to divine and logical calm
Mystical beauty germinating
from the monolithic servility
in its last momentous glory
I see myself-
bound
bloodied
solid
pallid
Serene death departs
drenched in pristine white
as the cheerless city
breathes thru
the slow night.
Shivering alone
sitting under
the leafless tree
by the deserted brick lane
haunted by primitive ghosts
the wind howling with
their requiems
in my desperate hour
of need
the last drops
of blood
gurgling in farewell bid
I count-breathe-blink
my dried tears smell of
pathos and derangement
so manic and profound that
the washed out moon hides behind
the veil of thick clouds-in atonement
I breathe-blink-count
The scurry of nocturnal lives
seems like a distant rumble
a fresh drop of sweat
t
r
i
c
k
l
e
s
d
o
w
n
my forehead
which seemingly feels
d i s t a n t
and another
f
o
l
l
o
w
s
scorched by
inner fear a n d
outer fever
of volatile trepidation
as the perplexed neurons
collide amongst
(one) (another)
I blink-breathe-count
A rebellious outrage seems
to be underway
with meticulous imperfection
stampede.
rampage.
Picanic('i' don't 'see')
The frozen blood
on the stainless blade
has left a smudge-
an aberration
in the silvery refection
The owl hoots on
the perched branch
an anguished acrimony
in the glint of its eyes
as it watches the spectacle
u n f o l d in cold comfort
The life-force dances inside
the prison-a dance of death
or maybe the dance of joy-
the sheer metaphysical melodrama
I count-blink
The soul on the brink of acquittal
from the soiled asylum
The throbbing inside the skull
now a regular blasting
of sanity and the comatose reality-
i-n-t-e-r-m-i-t-t-e-n-t
Rigor mortis seems
still another eon away (but why?)
I blink
F i n a l l y
the battle ends
so does a life of
dignified misery
meaningless drudgery
senseless camaraderie
soulless scenery
binary. nunnery. slavery.
(Some have named it
salvation
the puritans, suicide
shorthand. shortcut. cut-short.)
The suppressed grin provides
the contrasting antithesis
(or maybe the setting
for an unceremonious departure?)
The commotion ends abruptly
as the motionless body
sits in an enviable trance
The Buddha of suburbia
beneath the wizened tree
the chakras ceased
the prana free
The chaos of life giving way
to divine and logical calm
Mystical beauty germinating
from the monolithic servility
in its last momentous glory
I see myself-
bound
bloodied
solid
pallid
Serene death departs
drenched in pristine white
as the cheerless city
breathes thru
the slow night.
When Hands Unlock
Will you please recall
our tall , cheer
my happiness enclosed
within a single
crystal cut tear.
Remember my
platinum eye
that strived to enlive
through jewels
that pooled
through curls of pearls
that swirled to a twirl
into an ocean
lotion sky
so fairytale and far
so orbital so high.
Will you all
recall
will you remember me
when I go
when I fall
will you plant a tree.
When I meet a sky of emerald
will I salute
an astute
ancient army general.
When I can no longer laugh into your eyes
when I can no longer put my arm around you
and capture summers golden sunshine skies.
When I am gone
when I ascend away
always remember me , in my heyday
the stones at your window
aftershave upon a pillow
remember me when you sit and breath
all that glows.
Extend your vision
across rape seed hills of colourful collision
watch the sun disappear
into a valley of fantasy as night comes clear
dont fear
my sun down
just light a waxed torch and sit beneath my tree
and watch as I flicker around .
When I have gone out far
when I leave
recall the string in the buttons
you sewn on my sleeves
hold on to my dream to be
you must not forget all of me .
My words strewn over pages
my scruffy autograph
my smile within a photograph
all my images .
When hands unlock
and upon the door i knock
dont forget me
please plant a tree
then our forests and fields
will forever rock
eternally.
Will you please recall
our tall , cheer
my happiness enclosed
within a single
crystal cut tear.
Remember my
platinum eye
that strived to enlive
through jewels
that pooled
through curls of pearls
that swirled to a twirl
into an ocean
lotion sky
so fairytale and far
so orbital so high.
Will you all
recall
will you remember me
when I go
when I fall
will you plant a tree.
When I meet a sky of emerald
will I salute
an astute
ancient army general.
When I can no longer laugh into your eyes
when I can no longer put my arm around you
and capture summers golden sunshine skies.
When I am gone
when I ascend away
always remember me , in my heyday
the stones at your window
aftershave upon a pillow
remember me when you sit and breath
all that glows.
Extend your vision
across rape seed hills of colourful collision
watch the sun disappear
into a valley of fantasy as night comes clear
dont fear
my sun down
just light a waxed torch and sit beneath my tree
and watch as I flicker around .
When I have gone out far
when I leave
recall the string in the buttons
you sewn on my sleeves
hold on to my dream to be
you must not forget all of me .
My words strewn over pages
my scruffy autograph
my smile within a photograph
all my images .
When hands unlock
and upon the door i knock
dont forget me
please plant a tree
then our forests and fields
will forever rock
eternally.
"What Does God Have Planned for Me?"
Time goes by too slow for me
As the clock ticks
I flow aimlessly
In my own mind...
In my own world...
I wonder what does God have planned for me?
Am I to live
With this sickness inside me?
Forever will it be
That this sadness will plague me?
No peace fills my mind
Don't think I'll ever find
True happiness...
What does God have planned for me?
To just sit and wait?
All I do is contemplate
In my deep depression
I feel I need to go to confession
To tell my father
That I can't wait any longer...
Am I to continue to hate
Myself because I am afraid?
All the options I had
I made too late
And every night I pray
I wake up in the morning still sad
Because nothing still hasn't changed...
What does God have planned for me?
I just sit and wait
All I do is contemplate
In my regression
I feel there's no other option
But to tell my father
That I won't wait any longer...
As the clock ticks
I flow aimlessly
In my own mind...
In my own world...
Time goes by too slow for me
As I continue to wonder
What does God have planned for me?
By Tara M. AKA LyricalLady
Time goes by too slow for me
As the clock ticks
I flow aimlessly
In my own mind...
In my own world...
I wonder what does God have planned for me?
Am I to live
With this sickness inside me?
Forever will it be
That this sadness will plague me?
No peace fills my mind
Don't think I'll ever find
True happiness...
What does God have planned for me?
To just sit and wait?
All I do is contemplate
In my deep depression
I feel I need to go to confession
To tell my father
That I can't wait any longer...
Am I to continue to hate
Myself because I am afraid?
All the options I had
I made too late
And every night I pray
I wake up in the morning still sad
Because nothing still hasn't changed...
What does God have planned for me?
I just sit and wait
All I do is contemplate
In my regression
I feel there's no other option
But to tell my father
That I won't wait any longer...
As the clock ticks
I flow aimlessly
In my own mind...
In my own world...
Time goes by too slow for me
As I continue to wonder
What does God have planned for me?
By Tara M. AKA LyricalLady
Suicide Note
I really should not
But I will
Fly from this building tonight
It will be such a thrill
Down below I see the lights
Little things, miniatures
Rushing cars and streetlights
People rushing by with their dreams
Ambitions and achievements
Triumphs and accomplishments
I have none of those
I am a non-entity
I do not exist
I am nothing
I am no one
And this little shred of humanity
Should be destroyed
I stand poised on this ledge
Looking down before I fly
I think about what led
me to this little flight
A journey of discovery
A lifetime of knowing
That I want to end tonight
Innocence lost
A dream shattered
Unwanted knowledge gained
My mother wished I was scrapped from her womb
She told me that one day
And in an instance wished she did not
My father wished I was a boy
And ignored me when I was not
My siblings hated me
For being just me
My lovers used me
And discarded me when it was over
I am used merchandise
Tonight I reached the zenith
Of my hurt
When you I love said goodbye
In this letter in my hand
The wind they sing a lullaby
The cold air like gentle arms
Engulf me lovingly, freezing me
I need to go
I am flying now
See you in my dreams
I really should not
But I will
Fly from this building tonight
It will be such a thrill
Down below I see the lights
Little things, miniatures
Rushing cars and streetlights
People rushing by with their dreams
Ambitions and achievements
Triumphs and accomplishments
I have none of those
I am a non-entity
I do not exist
I am nothing
I am no one
And this little shred of humanity
Should be destroyed
I stand poised on this ledge
Looking down before I fly
I think about what led
me to this little flight
A journey of discovery
A lifetime of knowing
That I want to end tonight
Innocence lost
A dream shattered
Unwanted knowledge gained
My mother wished I was scrapped from her womb
She told me that one day
And in an instance wished she did not
My father wished I was a boy
And ignored me when I was not
My siblings hated me
For being just me
My lovers used me
And discarded me when it was over
I am used merchandise
Tonight I reached the zenith
Of my hurt
When you I love said goodbye
In this letter in my hand
The wind they sing a lullaby
The cold air like gentle arms
Engulf me lovingly, freezing me
I need to go
I am flying now
See you in my dreams
Shocked
A spark
tingles through
my body
as I touch
the outlet
I slow down
The trembling starts
the shaking comes next
My hair stands up
and then the burn
mists it’s way in
I try to let go
but the physical
addiction
stops me
My mind says HELL NO
but my body doesn’t reply
And then my memory
says goodbye
Then HELP!!!!
becomes HAFGB:ISHFJWRJESOHSR:?!>!\
My words are scrambled
My thoughts are next
And then my eyes pop out of my head
I fall to the floor
my legs give way
and I passed away
A spark
tingles through
my body
as I touch
the outlet
I slow down
The trembling starts
the shaking comes next
My hair stands up
and then the burn
mists it’s way in
I try to let go
but the physical
addiction
stops me
My mind says HELL NO
but my body doesn’t reply
And then my memory
says goodbye
Then HELP!!!!
becomes HAFGB:ISHFJWRJESOHSR:?!>!\
My words are scrambled
My thoughts are next
And then my eyes pop out of my head
I fall to the floor
my legs give way
and I passed away
Let Me Go
I think about how much I hate my life as I,
sit in the tub pulling out my razor,
grab my parents gun, checking to see if it’s loaded,
open up my window and peer at the street, 50 feet below,
step on the chair, slipping the noose around my neck.
I think about you
and I can’t breathe
I’m so pissed.
I loved you and you lied.
Let me do this.
Let me go I cry
as the razor bites my wrist,
red pooling into the tub.
Let me go I whisper
as I put the gun to my head,
pulling the trigger.
Let me go I scream
as I spread my arms out
and jump.
Let me go I mumble
as I kick the chair out from under me,
the rope cutting my breath off,
snapping my neck.
Don’t cry over me.
Let me go.
Let,
me,
go.
I think about how much I hate my life as I,
sit in the tub pulling out my razor,
grab my parents gun, checking to see if it’s loaded,
open up my window and peer at the street, 50 feet below,
step on the chair, slipping the noose around my neck.
I think about you
and I can’t breathe
I’m so pissed.
I loved you and you lied.
Let me do this.
Let me go I cry
as the razor bites my wrist,
red pooling into the tub.
Let me go I whisper
as I put the gun to my head,
pulling the trigger.
Let me go I scream
as I spread my arms out
and jump.
Let me go I mumble
as I kick the chair out from under me,
the rope cutting my breath off,
snapping my neck.
Don’t cry over me.
Let me go.
Let,
me,
go.
"Red Moon"
Here I stand lake side in the dark of night
Floating reflection of me back dropped by moonlight
The color has slowly faded from these eyes
Blood dripping over my eyelids falling down the sides
Blurred vision and the world is still so innocent
Caught up in its own beauty, terrible witness
To the dyeing boy alone with bleeding wrists
Sad eyes blink one last time, leaving one image
Tears falling to her soft pink lips
Whispering I love you, I love you so don’t do this
What a beautiful vision, time for me to stop wishing
All strength has bleed from this tireless body
Falling over becoming one with my reflection
Sinking deep, I have lost all connection
Not to be saved is truly a blessing
As the lake calms, returns the moons reflection
Colored in red, the grave of a suicidal affection
Here I stand lake side in the dark of night
Floating reflection of me back dropped by moonlight
The color has slowly faded from these eyes
Blood dripping over my eyelids falling down the sides
Blurred vision and the world is still so innocent
Caught up in its own beauty, terrible witness
To the dyeing boy alone with bleeding wrists
Sad eyes blink one last time, leaving one image
Tears falling to her soft pink lips
Whispering I love you, I love you so don’t do this
What a beautiful vision, time for me to stop wishing
All strength has bleed from this tireless body
Falling over becoming one with my reflection
Sinking deep, I have lost all connection
Not to be saved is truly a blessing
As the lake calms, returns the moons reflection
Colored in red, the grave of a suicidal affection
Anonymous
Sucks .
I used to believe
there was no such thing
as a bad day.
And today,
I sit at the park
on the bonnet
of my car
under the
perfect tree.
The
wife
ran
away
with
my
Rope .
-x-
Written by AliP
I used to believe
there was no such thing
as a bad day.
And today,
I sit at the park
on the bonnet
of my car
under the
perfect tree.
The
wife
ran
away
with
my
Rope .
-x-
Written by AliP
Anonymous
GOODBYE
I leave behind my eyes
eyes that only saw fairy tales
I leave behind my hair
hair that hungered
for a lovers hands to run through it
I leave behind my skin
skin that yearned to be caressed
I leave behind my smile
of which was so bright
when I thought of better days
I leave behind my hands
hands that reached out
and were never taken
But I cant leave behind my heart
because the damage is far
more than can be repaired
And I cant leave my strength
because I have lost it all
I cant do this anymore
Goodbye
I leave behind my eyes
eyes that only saw fairy tales
I leave behind my hair
hair that hungered
for a lovers hands to run through it
I leave behind my skin
skin that yearned to be caressed
I leave behind my smile
of which was so bright
when I thought of better days
I leave behind my hands
hands that reached out
and were never taken
But I cant leave behind my heart
because the damage is far
more than can be repaired
And I cant leave my strength
because I have lost it all
I cant do this anymore
Goodbye
Death Note
by ~UnleashedHeathen
I don't want to kill myself with a gun
Because to me that would seem petty
Nor do I want to slit my wrists like an 'emo' - emotional fake, I say-
I don't want to give you the satisfaction that you so secretly want
I can see it in your face. I can smell your fear
Of " Will it be me first, or her; doing what should have been done long ago"
Let's face it. Everyone gets lost in there own version of reality.
I'm not going to pretend that I was depressed
Because I know that the outcome I presumed would be irrational
It would be insane to think that you would be happy because you got what you desired.
I didn't kill myself. I didn't die unexpectedly.
I just disappeared where I can see you and everything you do.
Because you set me free, I can see the happiness you so greedily hid.
by ~UnleashedHeathen
I don't want to kill myself with a gun
Because to me that would seem petty
Nor do I want to slit my wrists like an 'emo' - emotional fake, I say-
I don't want to give you the satisfaction that you so secretly want
I can see it in your face. I can smell your fear
Of " Will it be me first, or her; doing what should have been done long ago"
Let's face it. Everyone gets lost in there own version of reality.
I'm not going to pretend that I was depressed
Because I know that the outcome I presumed would be irrational
It would be insane to think that you would be happy because you got what you desired.
I didn't kill myself. I didn't die unexpectedly.
I just disappeared where I can see you and everything you do.
Because you set me free, I can see the happiness you so greedily hid.
I find myself tensed
hopeless and frightened
I dont want to do it
but I cannot stop
Behind me my empty life of stress
How can I go on
Living as a shadow of myself
I dont want to do it
But I cannot stop
I think of all those I love
I know this will hurt
But its time to fuck the world
Shivering till this long night's gone
Enter a blissful peace
in the opening dawn
I dont want to do it
I love being around my peeps
and many other things I'd miss
But I cant stick around for any of this
why me?
Completely ill
I rush for the pills
Jittery,teary but determined
I cant stop....
No
Not now
I've come this far
no turning back
Pop the pills
Fuck how it feels
Childhood memories
flash through my eyes
Gate of paradise
Good night cruel life
As for my dear wife
Think not less of me
hopeless and frightened
I dont want to do it
but I cannot stop
Behind me my empty life of stress
How can I go on
Living as a shadow of myself
I dont want to do it
But I cannot stop
I think of all those I love
I know this will hurt
But its time to fuck the world
Shivering till this long night's gone
Enter a blissful peace
in the opening dawn
I dont want to do it
I love being around my peeps
and many other things I'd miss
But I cant stick around for any of this
why me?
Completely ill
I rush for the pills
Jittery,teary but determined
I cant stop....
No
Not now
I've come this far
no turning back
Pop the pills
Fuck how it feels
Childhood memories
flash through my eyes
Gate of paradise
Good night cruel life
As for my dear wife
Think not less of me
Slow Suicide
The suffocating grasp of your claws has
made my spirit too numb to feel the
persecuting heartache the
torturing turmoil and
conflicting sorrow of
all my failures
The ferocious slashing of your teeth has
made my skin too thick to feel the
blistering anguish the
flaming grief and
blazing torment of
all my disappointments
The poisonous howl of your rage has
made my ears too deaf to hear the
degrading screeching the
sickening shrieking and
agonizing squalling of
all your disapproval's
Existing with you is a slow suicide
I have nothing to continue for, for
I have no one to continue with
I have not anything, for
I have nothing
I have not anyone, for
I have no one
I am not anything, for
I am nothing
The suffocating grasp of your claws has
made my spirit too numb to feel the
persecuting heartache the
torturing turmoil and
conflicting sorrow of
all my failures
The ferocious slashing of your teeth has
made my skin too thick to feel the
blistering anguish the
flaming grief and
blazing torment of
all my disappointments
The poisonous howl of your rage has
made my ears too deaf to hear the
degrading screeching the
sickening shrieking and
agonizing squalling of
all your disapproval's
Existing with you is a slow suicide
I have nothing to continue for, for
I have no one to continue with
I have not anything, for
I have nothing
I have not anyone, for
I have no one
I am not anything, for
I am nothing
Anonymous
<< post removed >>
A Madman's Broken Heart
I am what I am.. Should I apologize for it?
'Cause I'm still the same guy that YOU fell in love with.
You said you wouldn't hurt me, right from the start.
But that was the first thing you did. Now look at my heart!
Bleeding and beating to the rhythm of your name!
This pain I'm enduring is driving me insane!
More than usual! I almost want to cry!
Maybe laugh!..No wait!.. I think I want to die!
Hold on! Listen! I hear something in my head!
Never mind it's gone.. Maybe I'm already dead.
'Cause nothing seems to function Right.
And I'm still here, but you're out of sight.
Honestly! I don't know what to do!
Someone please tell me! I beg of you!
All I do is stare at my heart lying on the floor.
Broken into pieces, in a puddle of gore.
Can't you see that I'm on my knees?!
Someone!! Anyone!!! HELP ME PLEASE!!!!!
Oh wait. You can't see. These are just written words.
Is what I do a gift? A Blessing or a Curse?
Maritza!!! Can you hear me? Did i scare you my dear?
Is it me that you hate? Or my poems that you fear?
Well I guess it doesn't matter. It's already too late.
Thank you my love, for sealing my fate.
I'm going to be honest. I'm not going to lie.
I'm not good with break ups, or at saying goodbyes.
So here is my poem that I'm writing for you.
Now before I pull this trigger, I just want to say... I LOVE YOU...
AND GOODBYE..........
BANG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am what I am.. Should I apologize for it?
'Cause I'm still the same guy that YOU fell in love with.
You said you wouldn't hurt me, right from the start.
But that was the first thing you did. Now look at my heart!
Bleeding and beating to the rhythm of your name!
This pain I'm enduring is driving me insane!
More than usual! I almost want to cry!
Maybe laugh!..No wait!.. I think I want to die!
Hold on! Listen! I hear something in my head!
Never mind it's gone.. Maybe I'm already dead.
'Cause nothing seems to function Right.
And I'm still here, but you're out of sight.
Honestly! I don't know what to do!
Someone please tell me! I beg of you!
All I do is stare at my heart lying on the floor.
Broken into pieces, in a puddle of gore.
Can't you see that I'm on my knees?!
Someone!! Anyone!!! HELP ME PLEASE!!!!!
Oh wait. You can't see. These are just written words.
Is what I do a gift? A Blessing or a Curse?
Maritza!!! Can you hear me? Did i scare you my dear?
Is it me that you hate? Or my poems that you fear?
Well I guess it doesn't matter. It's already too late.
Thank you my love, for sealing my fate.
I'm going to be honest. I'm not going to lie.
I'm not good with break ups, or at saying goodbyes.
So here is my poem that I'm writing for you.
Now before I pull this trigger, I just want to say... I LOVE YOU...
AND GOODBYE..........
BANG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
