Poetry competition CLOSED 3rd March 2021 6:03pm
WINNER
anna_grin (ANNAN)
anna_grin (ANNAN)
RUNNER-UP:
javalini
Sacred Beliefs
I believe in the sacrad world of science,
Until I drifted away
the sacred world of science
became harder to change minds
It all started in the hospitals
I moved on to
The Miracles
It was miraculous
I got everything
I asked for
Seven cars
Six houses
Five mistresses
until I did not want it anymore
And God chuckled
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMeNC6QYR/
Until I drifted away
the sacred world of science
became harder to change minds
It all started in the hospitals
I moved on to
The Miracles
It was miraculous
I got everything
I asked for
Seven cars
Six houses
Five mistresses
until I did not want it anymore
And God chuckled
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMeNC6QYR/
Rabbit, thank you for your entry. anna, if the one you submitted for Tallen's comp is new it more than qualifies for this thread too. As long as the poem was written after this comp was started, I really don't care where else it's posted. Lots of members enter multiple comps with the same entry. It's no biggie to me.
Shore up a crumbing wall
My faith, the gap, is simple, not decadent
I cast a line with hook and weight
false idols bright, I view so hesitant
my line was slack and never taught
I heard the want, of natures chant
it hummed discord
grumbled disgust, with needs and wants
never, bow on knee with a murmuring hoard
Not the edifice, imposing grand facade
a lightening flash, the thunder answer back
200 pipe organ, playing Bach
the angry storm with winds that lash
For Gaia's need, to kiss the earth
mankind so deaf to her beseech
ever grey, the dawn be overcast
and prayer will never fill the breach
Plastic idols with us for Millennia
convenience, the offerings, betray each church
my testament, to see the forest's green agenda
plasters, on all natures hurt
Not frogmarched by consumerisms stigma
our living planet, heed its mater
preach to me no frigid dogma
but love, that has the power to alter
Not those dry and dusty scripts
nature, be my buttresses of influence
not steal the lead from each domesticity
nor fairy tales, but belief in common sense
Wear a Joseph's coat
A belief to preserve just what we have
my own colour, faith, a need invoked
repair all, that's been raped and stabbed
The cross to fill a gaping hole
I sing hymns that only earth can hear
boulders form from my resolve
build a base without compare
I cast a line with hook and weight
false idols bright, I view so hesitant
my line was slack and never taught
I heard the want, of natures chant
it hummed discord
grumbled disgust, with needs and wants
never, bow on knee with a murmuring hoard
Not the edifice, imposing grand facade
a lightening flash, the thunder answer back
200 pipe organ, playing Bach
the angry storm with winds that lash
For Gaia's need, to kiss the earth
mankind so deaf to her beseech
ever grey, the dawn be overcast
and prayer will never fill the breach
Plastic idols with us for Millennia
convenience, the offerings, betray each church
my testament, to see the forest's green agenda
plasters, on all natures hurt
Not frogmarched by consumerisms stigma
our living planet, heed its mater
preach to me no frigid dogma
but love, that has the power to alter
Not those dry and dusty scripts
nature, be my buttresses of influence
not steal the lead from each domesticity
nor fairy tales, but belief in common sense
Wear a Joseph's coat
A belief to preserve just what we have
my own colour, faith, a need invoked
repair all, that's been raped and stabbed
The cross to fill a gaping hole
I sing hymns that only earth can hear
boulders form from my resolve
build a base without compare
Written by slipalong
Go To Page
me myself and i
in truth
all my worship
is in service of
self improvement
self worth
self awareness
self respect
self control
and if that self same
is found in the gods
in the sky
land
or sea
if it is found at 3am
heartbroken
heart racing
in the lyrics
of an algorithmic auto play
or the other side of the day
in the yellow sun
on fire
or in sleep
where i skinwalk
in sex
where i
love
then
that’ll do
Written by anna_grin
(ANNAN)
Go To Page
This was a toughie! Thank you all for your entries and congratulations on your placements.
anna_grin: me myself and i
You nailed this comp; hands down. Change begins with us; if we fail to change our self for the greater good, then the greater good is lost through our self because every action, every word, every deed is not one of balance between love and truth.
Life is real; it's raw; and, as Rufus Wainwright would sing, Love is not a victory march [ . . . ]It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah( yes; that is my favorite version ). So, too was this verse that life is sacred and our wellbeing ( mental, emotional, and spiritual ) is paramount to its continuation. Abraham explained once that their teachings were considered selfish—indeed they are because if nothing else, everything begins with self.
Thank you for entering, and congratulations on your win.
javalini: CLUELESS
Jav, this was a flawless flow of read. I wonder, have you read this aloud to yourself? I read it at least three times aloud, and honestly had chills by the time I reached the end. I do not know why, but it reminds me of a Maori prayer ( in poetic form ) I read once; while the words are different, the essence is mirrored.
This verse is based in the trust of a higher power to provide despite the ignorance of humankind. Regardless of calamity or illness, innocents or ignorants, there exists more than us—there exists something called Love and ever-encompasses us.
Well done, and congratulations on your placement.
RiAN: Othin
Once again you bring us an essence of ancient wisdom adorned in beautiful imagery.
Unlike your first, which indicated to me our humble beginnings, this one is a watcher; animal totems being observed; earthen elements being experienced; a universal alignment of planets—to me it's a call of the wild to awaken the spirit to a history it has long forgotten. Perhaps even a healing mantra to the beat of a drum mimicking Mother Earth's own natural rhythm.
I particularly enjoyed the alliteration as well as consonance of some of your lines:
soothing slither
death of depths
depths of death
And your language is amazing:
Corpse of poetry
Knuckle of bones
restoring
each molecule
called history
It was an amazingly spiritual poem encapsulating a strong recognition of natural forces as well as those which extend beyond human knowing.
Thank you for submitting and congratulations on your placement.
Additional notes
Numer90: Afterlife
I enjoyed how you view the sacred as a journey into yourself with questions followed by contemplation. Your title would indicate that you have crossed over and are writing from that perspective. I garnered some type of rebirth at the ending, particularly with the baby yelling, as though you were being reborn; or, observing those who are from the other side.
It was a very interesting take on beliefs. Thank you for entering.
RiAN: The universe is my lover
Your works are always mystical and filled with a spiritual sense of knowing that I've always enjoyed. This poem takes me back to the beginning, before the light of dawn and spread of sun. When life just was and everything was One in trust and existence.
Your imagery was remarkable in this one, particularly this tercet:
in a milky white sea
floating in a byzantine
layer of time
I immediately garnered the sense of amoebas making their way to land and definitive form. It was a lovely profession of sacred belief from a spiritual perspective.
Thank you for entering.
JohnnyBlaze: Meeting Bare Minimum Requirements
I love how yours started off with how experience molds us all until we're wise enough to navigate around the obstacles. Your metaphor in regards to the ornate decoration of verse from a bare beauty was very clever.
Your equation of pure poetry to a sacred belief of fulfillment was spot on. I smiled when reading this and expected no less from the poet you are.
Thank you for entering and sharing your perspective.
Runawaymindtrain: The temple of the mind
Disqualified - not a new poem per competition guidelines
exvso8m1: Dark Souls
Sacred beliefs can sometimes be a pendulum from light to fear; from joy to horror; from life to death—it's whatever we hold within the deepest recesses of our hearts that emerge when we're faced with this type of challenge.
It appears you either harbor extreme love for horror or you have a horror of how one could face death. Here it is a brutal ( as determined by the final verse ) end that goes so far as one's heart being ripped from their chest.
I appreciate your attention to classic form of rhyme and punctuation, and appreciate you entering.
Just_Me_: Untitled ( Unless the image is the title? )
I very much like that your Sacred Belief is Love. And not just specifically loving, but being loved. We cannot allow ourselves to be loved until we wholly love ourselves first. That is a fact; if we do not find ourselves worthy of self-love, then we certainly won't believe in the ability of others to love us for who we are.
Your expression reiterates that such love ( both self and that of another ) is possible despite any physical attribution we may have. It was filled with hope.
I enjoyed perspective and thank you for entering.
[ Continued below ]
anna_grin: me myself and i
You nailed this comp; hands down. Change begins with us; if we fail to change our self for the greater good, then the greater good is lost through our self because every action, every word, every deed is not one of balance between love and truth.
Life is real; it's raw; and, as Rufus Wainwright would sing, Love is not a victory march [ . . . ]It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah( yes; that is my favorite version ). So, too was this verse that life is sacred and our wellbeing ( mental, emotional, and spiritual ) is paramount to its continuation. Abraham explained once that their teachings were considered selfish—indeed they are because if nothing else, everything begins with self.
Thank you for entering, and congratulations on your win.
javalini: CLUELESS
Jav, this was a flawless flow of read. I wonder, have you read this aloud to yourself? I read it at least three times aloud, and honestly had chills by the time I reached the end. I do not know why, but it reminds me of a Maori prayer ( in poetic form ) I read once; while the words are different, the essence is mirrored.
This verse is based in the trust of a higher power to provide despite the ignorance of humankind. Regardless of calamity or illness, innocents or ignorants, there exists more than us—there exists something called Love and ever-encompasses us.
Well done, and congratulations on your placement.
RiAN: Othin
Once again you bring us an essence of ancient wisdom adorned in beautiful imagery.
Unlike your first, which indicated to me our humble beginnings, this one is a watcher; animal totems being observed; earthen elements being experienced; a universal alignment of planets—to me it's a call of the wild to awaken the spirit to a history it has long forgotten. Perhaps even a healing mantra to the beat of a drum mimicking Mother Earth's own natural rhythm.
I particularly enjoyed the alliteration as well as consonance of some of your lines:
soothing slither
death of depths
depths of death
And your language is amazing:
Corpse of poetry
Knuckle of bones
restoring
each molecule
called history
It was an amazingly spiritual poem encapsulating a strong recognition of natural forces as well as those which extend beyond human knowing.
Thank you for submitting and congratulations on your placement.
Additional notes
Numer90: Afterlife
I enjoyed how you view the sacred as a journey into yourself with questions followed by contemplation. Your title would indicate that you have crossed over and are writing from that perspective. I garnered some type of rebirth at the ending, particularly with the baby yelling, as though you were being reborn; or, observing those who are from the other side.
It was a very interesting take on beliefs. Thank you for entering.
RiAN: The universe is my lover
Your works are always mystical and filled with a spiritual sense of knowing that I've always enjoyed. This poem takes me back to the beginning, before the light of dawn and spread of sun. When life just was and everything was One in trust and existence.
Your imagery was remarkable in this one, particularly this tercet:
in a milky white sea
floating in a byzantine
layer of time
I immediately garnered the sense of amoebas making their way to land and definitive form. It was a lovely profession of sacred belief from a spiritual perspective.
Thank you for entering.
JohnnyBlaze: Meeting Bare Minimum Requirements
I love how yours started off with how experience molds us all until we're wise enough to navigate around the obstacles. Your metaphor in regards to the ornate decoration of verse from a bare beauty was very clever.
Your equation of pure poetry to a sacred belief of fulfillment was spot on. I smiled when reading this and expected no less from the poet you are.
Thank you for entering and sharing your perspective.
Runawaymindtrain: The temple of the mind
Disqualified - not a new poem per competition guidelines
exvso8m1: Dark Souls
Sacred beliefs can sometimes be a pendulum from light to fear; from joy to horror; from life to death—it's whatever we hold within the deepest recesses of our hearts that emerge when we're faced with this type of challenge.
It appears you either harbor extreme love for horror or you have a horror of how one could face death. Here it is a brutal ( as determined by the final verse ) end that goes so far as one's heart being ripped from their chest.
I appreciate your attention to classic form of rhyme and punctuation, and appreciate you entering.
Just_Me_: Untitled ( Unless the image is the title? )
I very much like that your Sacred Belief is Love. And not just specifically loving, but being loved. We cannot allow ourselves to be loved until we wholly love ourselves first. That is a fact; if we do not find ourselves worthy of self-love, then we certainly won't believe in the ability of others to love us for who we are.
Your expression reiterates that such love ( both self and that of another ) is possible despite any physical attribution we may have. It was filled with hope.
I enjoyed perspective and thank you for entering.
[ Continued below ]
PoetsRevenge: Pierced Heart
I loved the classic offering of form and rhyme here; it really does mimic Byron or Yeats. You do it very well, particularly the language. The metaphor of the flowering epiphyte equating to the human heart is wonderful, as we, too, are organic structures. It also demonstrates that we are pure of heart as is nature's offerings. One does not look at a flower and say, Oh! How impure that bloom is!
If only we could view ourselves and others through such a filter as different flowers, all blooming at particular seasons of our lives. I think I just received a poetic inspiration!
Thank you for that, and for this wonderful entry.
nomoth: gul wiven
Nomoth, your work is always on a different level than most writers. You write in undercurrents of language that is more felt than studied; in spiritual visions and half-visions of two worlds that few rarely experience. I particularly loved this line:
and burn the map-making rooms.
Mapping out something is determining the path before you walk it. It could be a metaphor for school or the expectations of others' rules and regulations for our lives. I sensed a 'fuc'all' to that line—a freedom to be what one wants; to go where one wants; and to do what one wants so long as it doesn't harm another.
It was a beautiful offering of spirit, no moth. I appreciate you entry.
Slipalong: Shore up a crumbing wall
I am so impressed with just how far your writing has come, Slip. This is a classic entry; a testament to both form and rhyme. The content is beautifully expressed and holds a deep, sacred love for nature, and a desire to repair her damaged mantle. It demonstrates both compassion and an astute knowledge of metaphor. I particularly enjoyed the foundational reference of boulders ( rock ) building a base without compare vs sand.
That you chose to end the verse on that solid foundation says a lot about just how far you've come.
I have the same desire, my friend. Your entry was very touching. Thank you so much for submitting.
Razzerleaf: The warmth of cold stone
I very much enjoyed reading the cyclic nature of your entry. It is true that everything is here to serve us, especially what we consider waste. It turns out that a seed can grow from shit, just as shit fertilizes the soil for growth. I also interpreted this as a metaphor for human development as well. This aspect of interpretation is supported by the boy's own personal evolution of thought, as demonstrated by his absorbing both fruit ( also a reference to the bible in regards to the fruit of life/you shall know them by their fruits/etc. ) and word ( specifically the word of God ).
This was cleverly done and very well executed. Thank you for your entry. It teaches a valuable lesson if one is willing to listen. . .
Rabbitquest: Untitled
I too, love the sacred world of science and furthermore believe that it interacts very closely with the spiritual world. The spiritual being the seed and scientific the manifestation of that seed through our desires and subsequent action.
I particularly enjoyed the irony of this entry, in that it expresses the old adage: 'Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it.'
Thank you for your entry.
A very special thank you to all entrants for such wonderfully thought-provoking pieces.
I loved the classic offering of form and rhyme here; it really does mimic Byron or Yeats. You do it very well, particularly the language. The metaphor of the flowering epiphyte equating to the human heart is wonderful, as we, too, are organic structures. It also demonstrates that we are pure of heart as is nature's offerings. One does not look at a flower and say, Oh! How impure that bloom is!
If only we could view ourselves and others through such a filter as different flowers, all blooming at particular seasons of our lives. I think I just received a poetic inspiration!
Thank you for that, and for this wonderful entry.
nomoth: gul wiven
Nomoth, your work is always on a different level than most writers. You write in undercurrents of language that is more felt than studied; in spiritual visions and half-visions of two worlds that few rarely experience. I particularly loved this line:
and burn the map-making rooms.
Mapping out something is determining the path before you walk it. It could be a metaphor for school or the expectations of others' rules and regulations for our lives. I sensed a 'fuc'all' to that line—a freedom to be what one wants; to go where one wants; and to do what one wants so long as it doesn't harm another.
It was a beautiful offering of spirit, no moth. I appreciate you entry.
Slipalong: Shore up a crumbing wall
I am so impressed with just how far your writing has come, Slip. This is a classic entry; a testament to both form and rhyme. The content is beautifully expressed and holds a deep, sacred love for nature, and a desire to repair her damaged mantle. It demonstrates both compassion and an astute knowledge of metaphor. I particularly enjoyed the foundational reference of boulders ( rock ) building a base without compare vs sand.
That you chose to end the verse on that solid foundation says a lot about just how far you've come.
I have the same desire, my friend. Your entry was very touching. Thank you so much for submitting.
Razzerleaf: The warmth of cold stone
I very much enjoyed reading the cyclic nature of your entry. It is true that everything is here to serve us, especially what we consider waste. It turns out that a seed can grow from shit, just as shit fertilizes the soil for growth. I also interpreted this as a metaphor for human development as well. This aspect of interpretation is supported by the boy's own personal evolution of thought, as demonstrated by his absorbing both fruit ( also a reference to the bible in regards to the fruit of life/you shall know them by their fruits/etc. ) and word ( specifically the word of God ).
This was cleverly done and very well executed. Thank you for your entry. It teaches a valuable lesson if one is willing to listen. . .
Rabbitquest: Untitled
I too, love the sacred world of science and furthermore believe that it interacts very closely with the spiritual world. The spiritual being the seed and scientific the manifestation of that seed through our desires and subsequent action.
I particularly enjoyed the irony of this entry, in that it expresses the old adage: 'Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it.'
Thank you for your entry.
A very special thank you to all entrants for such wonderfully thought-provoking pieces.
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