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Teach me to rap!

JohnnyBlaze
JohnnyBlaze
Tyrant of Words
United States
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Joined 20th Mar 2015
Forum Posts: 1719

As The Nazgul Raps

 
Witch KING?    
This KING    
One of the Nine    
servING the Dark Lord of BLING    
R-I-N-G;    
that's spells RING    
Listen up, GolLUM -    
let me TELL you SOMETHING!    
What is your WRATH    
COMpared to the MIGHT of a WRAITH    
who lives to CREEP in the DEAD of NIGHT?    
Impaling hobbits in their SLEEP    
scar'UM to death with FRIGHT    
BREAK their FAITH    
MAKE'UM WEEP    
while I TAKE deLIGHT    
A wreath of iron THORNs    
ADORNs me with a crown of DREAD    
Just you try to PUMPING me FULL of LEAD    
Getcha SUMTING AIGHT;    
A MORNing STAR upside the HEAD    
Yeah, that's RIGHT    
That's what I SAID,    
beeYOTCH    
yo-YO-yo-YO-yo    
I'ma a NazGUL    
Nasty ass FELow minus a SOUL    
Bat outta HELL    
riding a FELL BIRD with a stinky CROTCH    
SO foul and SMELLY    
Flying fast and furiousLY FAR    
straight out of AngMAR      
Mister G    
WORD    
 
Written by JohnnyBlaze
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educational non entry

JohnnyBlaze
JohnnyBlaze
Tyrant of Words
United States
18awards   profile   poems   message
Joined 20th Mar 2015
Forum Posts: 1719

Puttin' My Dingle Berries In Your Pie Tin

   
Yo, here we go - so easy to rap a villanelle    
Copy, paste, replace; drop your own words in    
See? Being none the wiser, who could tell?    
   
‘Tis easy, somewhat sleazy, but I do it oh so well    
While I buy a slice of that pie you's offerin'    
Yo, here we go - so easy to rap a villanelle    
   
Ice Ice Baby - watch my latest single sell    
Puttin' My Dingle Berries In Your Pie Tin    
See? Being none the wiser, who could tell?    
   
Madame, go Madame, go try it for a spell    
Your posse cool whips this hip hop villain    
Yo, here we go - so easy to rap a villanelle    
   
I am the I in your pie, only def like Pharell    
Projecting just like Alan Parson('s?)    
See? Being none the wiser, who could tell?    
   
Rub my Vanilla lotion on your painful swell    
If your head is so ahurtin'    
Yo, here we go - so easy to rap a villanelle    
See? Being none the wiser, who could tell?    
   
* drops the mic *    
   
Folks, show's over, drop the curtain.    
 
Written by JohnnyBlaze
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educational non entry

JohnnyBlaze
JohnnyBlaze
Tyrant of Words
United States
18awards   profile   poems   message
Joined 20th Mar 2015
Forum Posts: 1719

Death Chant Three Point Three

Got to be
light on your feet    
Death Chant Three Point Three  
Adapt -or- Die
admit defeat  
    
Now looky here, Son    
You too, Edible One    
Year after year    
rap challenges I won    
because I was    
light on my feet      
   
while all of yous?    
hardly Harlem hopscotchin'    
like Maya Angelo or Langston    
Hughes with flow-in beat    
on message - targeted    
yanno?    
   
I don't think so.    
   
What you got instead?    
   
Virtual nine mils    
in-da-back of the head    
thrill kills, Playstation style    
when not in-yo-face to faces    
on Main Street - 8 mile    
duels with phantom menaces -    
supposed riders you ghosted    
on Instagram n Facebook -    
your pistol whippings posted    
making no sense, lacking hook;    
empty threat-ened spills    
against public enemies faux    
You bustin' caps in these    
   
L - M - F - A - OH, PLEASE!    
   
Just another on a long list    
of the gangsta wannabees    
in a kingdom come    
of self annointed kings    
wanting rings kissed    
among other things    
riddled with disease    
subscribing to their own    
hollow pointed prophecies    
rhetorical, glorifying    
prostitution rings    
drugs and death    
in the name of profits    
   
All wasted breath    
   
far from compelling    
these days - storytelling    
cliches so unoriginal    
might as well be    
marshalled blathers    
inane, inconsequential -    
daily matters we    
could care less about:    
expired dairy products    
in the fridge you    
shoulda threw out    
weeks ago;    
who gives two fucks    
as you cry over spills    
of milk so old, they    
curdled whey    
beyond cream    
   
Be bold    
   
be MLK;    
   
declare to the nation:    
   
"I have a dream!"    
   
Don't be some    
gimmicky    
mimicky    
mime with a combover meme    
covering up every contextual    
bald spot in your raps' middle    
with references sexual    
and indifferences to rhyme    
   
^Diss^  
being the answer    
to the riddle you've    
yet to solve    
   
because it's time    
to prove you can be    
light on your feet    
Adapt -or- Die
admit defeat    
   
EVOLVE!  
   
 
Written by JohnnyBlaze
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the5thRiddler
the5thRiddler
Thought Provoker
United Kingdom
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Joined 6th Aug 2019
Forum Posts: 515

🏆
“How to Rap: Walter Sparrow’s quick draft”

[Hook:]
You’re not the only one who
wants to shoot the twat
Walking around telling people
who can’t and who can rap
On rope, tell Tyler it’s not getting me
lucky seven I’d have left want sleep
like you’re being born
and I’m only 23

Damn it, still can’t find a fucking
chorus that’s hot enough
so I said I was backwards
call me the Riddler E
and them I sing many with Jim Carrey
In my sights is that Reemiss guy
as it’s like, you think you’re gangster
but not until a body’s in the grave
then take her bracelet
so I’m trying to wake Ricky, it’s mazing
keyboard is missing an eh?

[HOOK]
Keep talking about Eminem
and I don’t even want to be anything like him
that’s more like Eric
Inside his mind quick like I know what his writing
Denace I am, and I stand as
annoying fan
like his whole band, you’d want to lose it
not working out to it in the gym
my shouting wanting you to turn off the music
claim Ricky’s a bad father
just spilt an open bottle of water on the table
How do I drown?
Jumped out the window
and flew up over the house
because it wouldn’t have been suicide

the5thRiddler
the5thRiddler
Thought Provoker
United Kingdom
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Joined 6th Aug 2019
Forum Posts: 515

the5thRiddler
the5thRiddler
Thought Provoker
United Kingdom
  profile   poems   message
Joined 6th Aug 2019
Forum Posts: 515

📞
Suicide Hotline: HipHop

“Hello, it’s Frank Drebin. How may I help you?”
Hello, yes, can you think...
“Detective, might have heard of me in The Naked Gun.”
Listen, my pen has run out of ink
and nearly have run out of credit
There isn’t gonna be a Disaster meets Destruction collaboration
said it countless of times
and doesn’t matter whether they come begging
“Sounds like you’ve got a lot on your chest kid, ever tried to shave it off?”
You might think this is crazy
but if you ever see her around the insane asylum
it’s not her painting
and you should get it off her
It’s the one of Jason stood on the ghost train
and Hellraiser overhead in a helicopter
Near the dodgems
Kruger was with a hoover
“I wouldn’t come there, but where you at, what fun fair?”
One with Edward Scissorhands
beside that stall
No dealer, but I’d have met you at the drop
for candy floss you have to dash
and I’m up on the ladder
with one in my hands and you see the camera flash
“It’s 11:15 at night, and you can be walking to the shop to get a pen.”
You know, you ain’t making me feel any better yet
Already going through distress
because I’ve wanted to enter a Deep Underground competition
Looked on the thread and wanted to tell the last competitor
doubt would get through the hard shell
and for a title tell him he can’t spell
Sorry, genuine mistake, it’s love thy neighbour
Yet still brandishing a crucifix
like which is scarier
Exorcism of Emily Rose or The Autopsy of Jane Doe?
I’m feeling like I can destroy his 6 poems
keep shit going

EdibleWords
EdibleWords
Dangerous Mind
6awards   profile   poems   message
Joined 7th Jan 2018
Forum Posts: 688

Waffling Thug Poets

Today im Deeper than a coffin and i aint even die' yet  
Told a hundred puns and i aint even rhymed yet  
Wrote my verse in parody watch you page worms digest  
Got the sickest burns yet but you will deny it  
Lines full of, uh.... cried eyes bloody read wit ya  
Gold ink on pocket full of dead poets  
Smoked some bitch? What the fuck you hatin on?  
I know it's a virtue but makin sense is gone..  
Get conversation on... it will be a vacant home...  
What you want a quickie poem? okay I won't takey long  
 It's half something like Moses part the sea  
Count sylables we love writing we love ink  
Met this one poet told her my name is Jessi  
She kept calling me EW
My poems bloody bad so she prolly think I'm evil  
Truly it's the kids tho 10 kids don't let me think, tho  
Light my fire and I write slow  

See ink flo must be from that pink, tho  
Not shining ya  just like my poem forms tho  
Blunt siamese one by me based on you bro  
The thought police got me feeling like it's legal...  
 
 
Written by EdibleWords
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the5thRiddler
the5thRiddler
Thought Provoker
United Kingdom
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Joined 6th Aug 2019
Forum Posts: 515

🏨
“Good Nights Await: Eggs on Waffles, brown sauce”


Ninja, woulda seen and heard it all
but they don’t want me coming around

Poetry-slam in the canteen hall
and security are shoving me out

Though, Edna had stopped and remained
pointing others towards the
square glass window pane

Jessi said “Mouth open, and eyes
rolled in the back of his head
I think he’s masturbating near the door
Man said he was going through distress
like that mother fucker is weird for sure.”

So I made it back to my room
with a plate of egg, waffles and brown sauce
Dawn of the Dead movie too
like a song
and hearing aids in ears
not being took out yours

(Non-entry.)

EdibleWords
EdibleWords
Dangerous Mind
6awards   profile   poems   message
Joined 7th Jan 2018
Forum Posts: 688

the5thRiddler said:🏨
“Good Nights Await: Eggs on Waffles, brown sauce”


Ninja, woulda seen and heard it all
but they don’t want me coming around

Poetry-slam in the canteen hall
and security are shoving me out

Though, Edna had stopped and remained
pointing others towards the
square glass window pane

Jessi said “Mouth open, and eyes
rolled in the back of his head
I think he’s masturbating near the door
Man said he was going through distress
like that mother fucker is weird for sure.”

So I made it back to my room
with a plate of egg, waffles and brown sauce
Dawn of the Dead movie too
like a song
and hearing aids in ears
not being took out yours

(Non-entry.)


Keep writing, but i wanted to set you up,a rap shop! Have you been there? Bring rap!!!

https://deepundergroundpoetry.com/forum/workshop/read/11229/

Imma spit bars atcha! Get yer freak on, Rikki! Over there! 😎

the5thRiddler
the5thRiddler
Thought Provoker
United Kingdom
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Joined 6th Aug 2019
Forum Posts: 515

I’ll see you there, I guess.
Please don’t take anything personal. Just THANK YOU for going back and forth (if you do) 👍🏻

EdibleWords
EdibleWords
Dangerous Mind
6awards   profile   poems   message
Joined 7th Jan 2018
Forum Posts: 688

the5thRiddler said:I’ll see you there, I guess.
Please don’t take anything personal. Just THANK YOU for going back and forth (if you do) 👍🏻


It's an honor, amigo!🤘

slipalong
slipalong
Fire of Insight
United Kingdom
11awards   profile   poems   message
Joined 1st Jan 2018
Forum Posts: 338

swivel; On: dis - RAP

dat me cooler dan an ice cream van
rocket fuel sellin by the gram
number me cus i da man

I am dat bone
I am dat ham
cutting it the tins of spam

got da lable an me slidin right
machetti hide would U like a slice
i the biggest dirt on dis piece o turf
any cornur of mi universe

dont cross me up dats fee advice
pig's they even want to dice
its running on each main line

do the deals and get top wheels
Fararri dancing on the stallions heels
sit my bitch in the passenger seat

my county aint no crack me mastr of dat
I got the power I got the smack
come over now or I drill yo ass

top vote for brxit
the eurozone will spead it
keep coming back like a swingball
swivel on dis, im the king gimbal

the rap I sell the beat folded
essence send your world clouded
my microphones :Bleeped:
joint on a street deadbeat

mix dat RAP the toxins trap
don't break d chain for turkey cold
handcuffs just like a drug it holds

pimp yo ride with truth and pride
Prestige Marque; and turn the tide
stressin what U know is right

words that sting not dressin down
dat hornets nest dat's kicked around
dat finger clean would U make it brown
Written by slipalong
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socksscareme
socksscareme
Socks
Twisted Dreamer
Ireland
1awards   profile   poems   message
Joined 26th Jan 2019
Forum Posts: 15

Rap 101

I'm gonna teach you how to rap
Teach you how to flow
Soon you'll have a map
And a catchy intro

Fling about some metaphors
The same four chords
Get some syncopation
So you don't get bored
A counterbeat and melody
You can't ignore

Gotta hook like a spine
When your words half rhyme
A sweet hyperbole
It's all in the delivery

Sharp like a stegosaur
Back to the fours
Ride your beat hard and fast
Bass to the floor
This is rap 101
Gonna give you more

Gotta hook like a spine
When your words half rhyme
A sweet hyperbole
It's all in the delivery

You're ready for the mic
DUP slam night
Don't forget your mood
And you'll be alright
Handy dandy notebook
Spit to daylight

(Bridge)

Gotta hook like a spine
When your words half rhyme
A sweet hyperbole
It's all in the delivery

It's all in the delivery
It's all in the delivery
Written by socksscareme (Socks)
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Vamps
Vamps
Thought Provoker
United Kingdom
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Joined 8th Dec 2016
Forum Posts: 61

The Marked Men

 
I can't decide    
What's worse      
Putting money    
Before Mother Earth?
          
Or stabbing a man    
In the throat?        
Both are making    
Us choke          
Gasping for air          
The last word
Spoke
         
I'm yet to find    
The pulse          
On the arm of    
A man    
More focused on    
Cash        
Than the family    
Plan        
         
Time to make    
Some decisions          
Who's against them?    
Who's with them?    
   
Either you're    
Joining in    
on the killing          
or you're    
Not willing    
   
To be a part of    
This charade          
Count the
Death toll    
On blood    
Stained card    
         
A tally chart    
Of corpses          
Unsaid, unreported          
Speak up!          
There seems to    
Be a shortage    
   
Of good, honest    
Speakers          
You'll have to    
Do more    
Than tweet us!        
         
Time for    
Action!          
Get rid of these    
Sanctions    
   
On humanities hope    
Get rid of the dope    
Funnelling smoke    
Into your throat    
         
Don't    Plead
Ignorant          
I     Won't    
Apologise    
For
     This
Rant
        
It's gonna' need    
More than this          
Line them up    
Shackles around    
The wrists    
         
Draw up plans    
Of Freedom          
Poor out the truth    
And bleed them    
        
Dry off    
What they've taken    
from us          
All work    
Together    
We'll get it    
Sussed    
         
They're Marked  
Men        
   
We're coming    
for the    
Marked Men.        
         
         
                                              
Written by Vamps
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Vamps
Vamps
Thought Provoker
United Kingdom
3awards   profile   poems   message
Joined 8th Dec 2016
Forum Posts: 61

Happy Days

 
Happy days few and far between,    
Forget the party scene  
      
I like gettin' dressed up though,        
dog in tow, get to the party,        
can't wait to go  
 
after eatin' my fill, like an army drill.        
       
Buffet and booze, sometimes hard  
to choose, onto a winner, can't lose  
        
Grab the doggy bag and scarper,        
no listening to the harper  
 
or naff CD collection,        
no regrets, on reflection.        
       
Take a cruise through the streets,        
passing dudes selling meats  
      
Hustle and bustle,        
blokes prance around  
showing off their muscle  
      
birds a plenty, 16 to 20  
      
arses hangin' out,        
faces givin' it the  
trout pout, shoutin' about  

Welcome to  
the city folks,        
a fella stumbles  
in front then bokes  
      
.......nice,      
nine pints  
Madras and rice  
      
What a pretty  
picture we're painting,        
i'm through with dating  
        
Some girl  
slaps some geezer,        
i wonder what  
deed he did to her!?        
       
Oh well, better get home  
        
through flickering lights  
the moon, a moan,        
a girl laying down  
never made it home  
      
U alright?....i say,        
Piss off!!....okay  
        
but make sure you  
drink plenty of water,        
wonder if her parents  
know about the  
exploits of their daughter,        
Turn a corner.....      
       
A quid to the  
homeless guy        
an extra bit towards  
the smack he'll buy  
        
Key through the door,        
no run-ins  
with the law  
        
my sweet bed,        
down goes my head,        
see what tomorrows  
got in store  
        
Happy days!!
Written by Vamps
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