Poetry competition CLOSED 30th January 2020 8:50pm
WINNER
Jade-Pandora (jade tiger)
Jade-Pandora (jade tiger)
RUNNERS-UP:
snugglebuck
and BigG
ROAST, the RUTHLESS
Poetry Contest Description
Critique Overboard
UPDATE THIS COMP WAS DBL POSTED,
so two winners.
Have you grown weary of receiving Overly sweet comments praising your art?
By posting your poem here, you realize you have entered CRITIQUE THUNDERDOME, a no holds barred rip fest of your work.
But there is one catch. Before you cut up somebodies poem posted here in this competition, YOU MUST FIRST POST a poem of your own, welcoming harsh critique.
This thread is only for a very few,
If not to your taste well, you knowl.
Also please squeeze in a touch of humor, and self depracation while roasting.
Ultimately I hope this all amongst friends, where we learn and laugh and love each other all the Moore.
With that said,
HAVE AT IT
so two winners.
Have you grown weary of receiving Overly sweet comments praising your art?
By posting your poem here, you realize you have entered CRITIQUE THUNDERDOME, a no holds barred rip fest of your work.
But there is one catch. Before you cut up somebodies poem posted here in this competition, YOU MUST FIRST POST a poem of your own, welcoming harsh critique.
This thread is only for a very few,
If not to your taste well, you knowl.
Also please squeeze in a touch of humor, and self depracation while roasting.
Ultimately I hope this all amongst friends, where we learn and laugh and love each other all the Moore.
With that said,
HAVE AT IT
Need Mo Whiz, Dumb
I tol u
Yur back-wurd
Get smarts
No bumazz
Smartur
I C yew
Dats wear u gunna
B
If U can spale
Dis is stoop-id
Tryin ta talk 2U
Yur back-wurd
Get smarts
No bumazz
Smartur
I C yew
Dats wear u gunna
B
If U can spale
Dis is stoop-id
Tryin ta talk 2U
Written by EdibleWords
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Jog on
Booze filled body Sweety and clammy
I lay next to you Pristine and calm
Once was lovers Such magical times
Our bodies once tangled But my head's so mangled
I think I should leave before I do you harm,
The Voices have ceased calling my name
But all I remember are the words you said
On my way to rehab I wish you was dead
Is this the life we must carry and share
Just because we have a child now their.
I lay next to you Pristine and calm
Once was lovers Such magical times
Our bodies once tangled But my head's so mangled
I think I should leave before I do you harm,
The Voices have ceased calling my name
But all I remember are the words you said
On my way to rehab I wish you was dead
Is this the life we must carry and share
Just because we have a child now their.
Written by BigG
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I Have A Plan
I simply said ‘I have a plan’,
‘Twas off the record, did I say?
It’s early and I just began,
Don’t want the muse to go astray.
It doesn’t mean we’re on a clock,
I simply said ‘I have a plan’.
It’s promising no writer’s block,
In fact you may become a fan.
No guarantee it’s better than
The competition’s good intent.
I simply said ‘I have a plan’,
I’m not revealing where it went.
So hold your horses, wait a spell,
Watch’d pots don’t boi’l says a pan.
A magic potion? who can tell,
I simply said ‘I have a plan’.
( a non-entry )
Written by Jade-Pandora
(jade tiger)
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I Never
I never get depressed but I’ll suffer,
A year-long’s worth of months go sailing by.
Christmas as my woes are stocking stuffers
To hang around my waist like pecan pie.
I wish that’s all it was, I hardly eat,
I never get depressed but I’ll suffer.
A day of letting go would be a treat,
God help if the remedy proves tougher.
The devil how I work for my supper,
It’s never gonna matter anyhow.
I never get depressed but I’ll suffer,
Someday I’ll take on less than I do now.
And yet I wonder if I’ll find the time—
Like cigarettes, will quitting be rougher?
Cold turkey writing verse I’ll miss the rhyme,
I never get depressed but I’ll suffer.
Written by Jade-Pandora
(jade tiger)
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Depressed
(In response to Jade’s "I Never")
Now that the Christmas solstice,
Suffering has come to past
Prepare for the Spring Equinox
Tiss the time of depressing Lent
When the Yuletide season
Of painful kayas is replaced
With boring days of morose
When the soul is oppressed
Then, like Christ during Passover
Enjoy your last tasteless supper
Of bitter herbs and boiled meat
Before we walk the trail of somber
Strolling the Garden of Gethsemane
Among the fruiting Pecan trees
Realize the little pain we suffer
Then going through life gloomily
So, take up your cross to climb,
Calvary in determination
After your suffer crucifixion
And your subsequent resurrection
You’ll discover it is better
To experience pain and abide
Then to live in an endlessly
Unhappy and depressed
Now that the Christmas solstice,
Suffering has come to past
Prepare for the Spring Equinox
Tiss the time of depressing Lent
When the Yuletide season
Of painful kayas is replaced
With boring days of morose
When the soul is oppressed
Then, like Christ during Passover
Enjoy your last tasteless supper
Of bitter herbs and boiled meat
Before we walk the trail of somber
Strolling the Garden of Gethsemane
Among the fruiting Pecan trees
Realize the little pain we suffer
Then going through life gloomily
So, take up your cross to climb,
Calvary in determination
After your suffer crucifixion
And your subsequent resurrection
You’ll discover it is better
To experience pain and abide
Then to live in an endlessly
Unhappy and depressed
Written by snugglebuck
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Bent Questions
i’ve been trying
to bend mind
to see how far it flexes
without breaking
the question is
if it bends
to the point of fracture
how will I know?
is reality existent
only in my mind?
and if so
then
from inside
will it appear intact?
if i break my mind
will lost loves be found?
will dead friends come alive?
will the world be at peace?
or will it be worse?
(C)2019 Raibeart Bruis
to bend mind
to see how far it flexes
without breaking
the question is
if it bends
to the point of fracture
how will I know?
is reality existent
only in my mind?
and if so
then
from inside
will it appear intact?
if i break my mind
will lost loves be found?
will dead friends come alive?
will the world be at peace?
or will it be worse?
(C)2019 Raibeart Bruis
Written by Kinkpoet
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