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Betrayal

CJKay
CJKay
Lost Thinker
United States
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Joined 14th July 2019
Forum Posts: 3

Poetry Contest

This thread is for those of you who have lost friend due to being one sided. Just was more toxic than good. Could also be relationships with past lovers. Anything like that.
Bare with me, I'm new to this. Just thought it would be a fun way to read more writings from y'all. Get more recognition for your posts. If I'm doing anything wrong, let me know. Lol. Most importantly, have fun with it.

CJKay
CJKay
Lost Thinker
United States
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Joined 14th July 2019
Forum Posts: 3

Didn't want to enter, since I made the thread. But here's mine. If y'all need something to go off of. Hope y'all like it. 🙃

..............................................


Suffer in silence
Sleep through the violence
Trying to find a way outÖ

No, I'm not perfect
But I swear that I'm worth it.
I'm missing peace right now..

Can't say I never loved you
After all that we have been through
We got to this point, how?

Now I'm sitting all alone
No one tried to hit my phone..

I guess that's just how it goes.

That's why I can't fall in love
Because everybody switches up

I can't mess with all you foes.

I can't even keep my friends around,
Another bridge burned to the ground.

This shit just keeps on adding up,
I've finally had more than enough.

That's why I stay to my damn self,
Because y'all are to selfish for my help.

Tender hearts turn corrupt,
Tears turn to ashes..
No one wants to see me cry,
As the time keeps slowly passing..

No one cares about my downfalls,
My fears or my dreams..
They only care about my weakness,
Spitting on my self esteem.

I've always been a shoulder,
A confidant to those in need.
Yet my soul is so misunderstood,
I have no place to lean.
Everyone disappears,
While I'm drowning in the deep.

I have major trust issues..
My pureness is tarnished.
I can't be myself,
Without being honest.

Used and thrown away,
Like the garbage of yesterday.
When all I've ever wanted,
Was for someone to look my way.

Tell me it's gonna be okay,
Without it being a lie.
Without the anxiety,
Of being left wondering why.

Living on hope though,
It's so hard to stay positive.
Laying down in my bed,
My emotions are unbottling.

Comfortably numb..
Another shadow on the sun..

It's like I'm a magnet,
To all the chaos and commotion.
To the minimally devoted.
I forgive but can't forget,
No words go unnoted.

I have to keep the tv on,
So the voices don't take control.
Replaying every encounter,
Solace, I hardly know.

So use to the let downs,
Drama and arguments.
Preying on my kindness,
Like I'm some kind of target.

It doesn't matter how bad I'm hurt,
Because the only time they truly care..
Is when my face is on a shirt.
Watching me get lowered,
Six feet down in the dirt..

But I keep fighting everyday,
To focus on myself.
Keep the good vibes rolling,
Working on my mental health.

I've been through to much,
To let my ship sink.
It's my time rise above
Try not to overthink.

It's easy to get lost,
In what I already know.
Keep smiling through the pain,
& Let the past go.

Don't hold on to heartache,
Keep your mind right.
Don't let anyone,
Diminish your fight.

Because even a thunderstorm,
Comes to an end.
& Life will keep going,
So a new chapter can begin.

Ahavati
Ahavati
Tyrant of Words
United States
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Joined 11th Apr 2015
Forum Posts: 3843

New or old writes?

drone
drone
Dangerous Mind
Greece
10awards   profile   poems   message
Joined 3rd Sep 2011
Forum Posts: 569

Twisted

why do you need
to see
whats behind the door
are the words
i love you
not enough
any more
why do you insist
on looking
behind the scenes
when you know
what you will find
will not be me
yet you hope and pray
that i will change
while wishfull thinking
becomes your cage
as you lay
on your barron bed
of dispair
believing
one day
I Will Care

FromTheAsh
FromTheAsh
Tyrant of Words
United States
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Joined 20th Feb 2017
Forum Posts: 442

no good deed goes unpunished...

 
without warning it came
no breeze to betray movement
no subtle mumbling below breath
just the sound of lash striking flesh
and a residual ringing still echoing
the soft rhythmic pattern of retreating steps
no trace evident
like wisps of mistÖ
ÖadriftÖ
Öwafting through dense fog
nothing to be seen
reeling in confusion
nothing making sense
words fell on stoppered ears
willfully muffled to sound
as eyes averted to painted skies ignored reality
loving smiles once graciously gifted
arms felt wrapped in warm embrace
now found forcefully snatched away
these changes in demeanor
all bear shades most bitter
liberally laced
with the acrid taste of jealousy
as hands held out in customary manner lifted another
wiping tears & soothing deeply embedded pains
how did those compassionate actions
leave the bestower exposed to such harsh elements?
disregarding intent & innocence
strangely mistaken for something else
yet accepting no blame for your own part
in the breaking of three aching hearts
your carefully shrouded dishonesty
a slap in the face of loyalty
are you aware
how frosty your shoulder has gotten?
was it the suddenly averted attention
or the recipient of helpful intention
that turned those baby blues so green
now here stand the forgotten
the wrongfully accused
both giver & given
shunned, stunned & left out in the cold
shivering
in resounding silence
doors bolted & bonds broken
while you held hostage emotion
denying their expression
refusing to listen
as emerald hues stole true sight from you
turning & showing them your back
the discarded shoved quietly into your past
saddened but wiser
burned by the sting of the whip you so deftly used
wielded in underhand fashion
sometimes the†word
doesnít carry as much impact
as the†bite
of silent goodbyes




Copyright © 2019 FromTheAsh. All Rights Reserved
Written by FromTheAsh
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Tallen
Tallen
earth_empath
Tyrant of Words
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Joined 15th Oct 2018
Forum Posts: 1195

Glimmer of Hope CRUSHED by Eternal sad

I've always maintained that I
will only take what another
offers. I am not one to push
or pull or guilt You into any
one thing or any spiritual or
anything...Love.

I received an email yesterday
(NO, I am not going to share
it with You, as I've learned
a valuable lesson from this
yesterday) and this is some
of the most heart stabbing
bleed I've ever been privileged
to experience in my reinvented
life. I feel sick to my gut
as if I throw up right this
fuckin' minute; perhaps I will
do this later...every hour
of every - later.

That email has a hint of
forgiveness but under the weight
of eternal sad and obvious
betrayal, hope may just be
the tease.
What does it mean when some
someone says that You betrayed
them but they still deeply
love You?

Means that there's a slim
glimmer of hope for me, but
crushed under hers and mine~
eternal sad.

My love signs off to me an
unconditional good-bye:
agape. †Another ort of
hope?

I read too much. . .
Written by Tallen (earth_empath)
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Tallen
Tallen
earth_empath
Tyrant of Words
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Joined 15th Oct 2018
Forum Posts: 1195

Ahavati said:New or old writes?

Too late
as me and Willow have already submitted old writes


Ahavati
Ahavati
Tyrant of Words
United States
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Joined 11th Apr 2015
Forum Posts: 3843

Tallen said:

Too late
as me and Willow have already submitted old writes



Well it's not like I didn't ask first!

Bonzi
Bonzi
Fire of Insight
United States
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Joined 7th Sep 2017
Forum Posts: 84

Masochist

I miss you, all of you
the ups and downs
being spun around
dizzy with desire

Then gone so quickly
not seen for months
leaving rivers of tears
in your wake

Left to slowly rebuild
pieces of my heart
poorly shielded from
strong hollow winds
of promised love

Yet I stand here
barefoot
tattered cotton dress
head tilted up, eyes closed
facing west

Soft breeze of breath
caressing the surface of skin
touching the deepest corners
of an eternally broken heart

Longing for the next time
Written by Bonzi
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wallyroo92
wallyroo92
Dangerous Mind
United States
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Joined 11th July 2012
Forum Posts: 913

The Dream

We were young and full of imagination,
The world was ours for the taking,
We shared the same vision,
It was history in the making.
But as life happens we went our ways,
Only to meet two decades later,
We still shared that vision,
But yours was even greater.
Our friendship would help us achieve,
The dream we wanted to realize,
We were the first generation,
The vision in those kids eyes.
You took on as a teacher and mentor,
Yet somehow things went wrong
I didnít mind that you made mistakes,
After all we always make our own.
But I do mind that you didnít own up to it,
Or at least apologize for your blunder,
Especially when my offspringís involved,
And it tore the whole group asunder.
Where you so blind so as to not see?
How many childrenís hopes you broke?
All because of your foolish pride,
And made yourself the butt of a joke?
I kept away from rumors and gossip,
But little by little I felt even more withdrawn
Learn to swallow your pride, you let it die,
The dream when we dreamt is gone.
Twenty seven years of friendship,
Down the drain because you hurt my son,
You hurt a whole different generation,
Who chased the dream that now is gone.
All you had to do was apologize,
A true leader knows his role,
And everyone wouldíve supported you,
In realizing and achieving the goal.

Whenever I go and visit the organization,
I see that a new class has reconvened,
In the meantime Iíve gone and unfriended,
The friend who I once mentored
But killed the dream.

CJKay
CJKay
Lost Thinker
United States
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Joined 14th July 2019
Forum Posts: 3

You can add new or old, whatever you prefer . Lol. 🙃

Love all your peices. You all are so incredibly, individually talented. Keep em coming 💜

Addi82
Addi82
Lost Thinker
United States
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Joined 2nd Aug 2019
Forum Posts: 3

contradictions

Forever was a lie
Yet I believed it when u spoke
when I looked into your eyes
I missed that something u were trying to hide
I neglected to see that you're full of arrogance self riotousness and pride
yet still I welcomed your invasion
my soul and my body
accepted u on every occasion
why must I seek acceptance
why can't I just be alone
I'm stuck in this state of ambivalence
no one should have this power
my soul was up for the taking  
I left it out for u to devour
try as I may, try as I might
this is a battle my heart can not fight
no longer believe in you or your intentions
I think there's something u forgot to mention
played me like a pro
your words touched me, set my heart aglow
I've grown older n u would think wiser
but im no match for u  
as I look in your eyes that flicker soft Amber
your beauty's unmatched
n u knowingly use it for gain
and I got attached.
break it off like a dead limb
a future my mind  painted so bright
slowly fading, becoming so grim
easy to lose and hard to regain
trust isn't to be played with
once lost, things r never the same  
don't expect a warm welcome
you won't find it here  
apparently ur not the one  
no time to waste
I won't be mislead
I won't settle in haste
u will not get n my head
should have never let u n my bed
the sheets whisper and taunt
knowing exactly what I want
I can not give in a single bit
though I fien for u like a junkie
just needing one more hit
look in my eyes while I'm down on my knees
it's u I want,
that I desire to please  
ur a work of art, an absolute fantasy
your angelic, yet somehow demonic
my expectations were straight sardonic
your too good to believe
lips so soft, why do they decieve
I sit in solitude
thinking how things could be different
mind exploring every avenue
we are each others contradiction  
opposite and no good for each other
maybe our own addiction
i hate it will end like this
but u rather live a life of crime
love comes last in your world
so there can be no trying again, no next time.
 
 
Written by Addi82
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Jade-Pandora
Jade-Pandora
jade tiger
Tyrant of Words
United States
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Joined 9th Nov 2015
Forum Posts: 4786


Betrayed by our Mother🔥

Never a day that didnít pass
I always felt safe & sound.
My childhood lulled me into a
sense of false security.

But that wasnít apparent yet
as every year came and went,
Like cookie-cutter treats on a
bakery conveyor belt.

The seasons were reliable,
like when Mom would tuck me in.
The showers fell & flowers grew
in mild Spring temprement

The other seasons fell in line
as holidays were thrilling.
Each Eastertide & Christmastide
were filled with family giving.

I knew of other times that came,
all part of Mother Nature.
In southern Cali where I live,
there was a time of fire.

It happened after each Summer,
when Fall was bone-dry, dying.
For the Santana winds to stir
dead & dying leaves aglow.

So thru the years the climate turns
and has become all-year round.
Itís evíry day the wild and brush
Burns anywhere in Cali.


buddydog
buddydog
buddydog H Faulk III
Thought Provoker
United States
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Joined 5th May 2015
Forum Posts: 44

Broken Soul

Standing here, as the rain washes my tears away
Holding on to your promise of a sunny day
Itís more than the wind that chills my soul
Your memory is easier than you were to hold
 
We had some good times down here by these tracks
I guess you and I both know they ainít coming back †
I still sit here and listen to that lonesome whistle blow
Itís times like these your memory is so hard to let go
 †
If I could go back in time and have you forever to hold
Iíd make a deal with the Devil and sell my broken soul
Iíd Hope and pray God would see things my way
Cause without you I canít live another day
 
Written by buddydog (buddydog H Faulk III)
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blocat
blocat
Dangerous Mind
United Kingdom
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Joined 1st Nov 2012
Forum Posts: 236

Dear Bob....

He reads her letter yet again
Feels the same pang of pain
Canít take the pressure she says
Still I love you in so many ways
But canít live with you being over there
Me being over here
Iím only human my dear
I hope youíll see itís for the best
And for our little boy the joy
Of knowing the man he calls daddy
Comes home at night
Doesn't fight

Staying away
Whilst we can only watch and pray
Itís just too much watching the news
Wondering when itís your turn to lose
Canít do it any more
The flag draped caskets
Returning
See the widowsí tears
Burning
Coursing down their pain lined faces
Just another guy ran out of aces

Bob You know Iím not a whore
But I met a man,
It wasnít planned
It just happened
One of those things
He talks of a future
With wedding rings
Heís got a great job Bob
And little Jimmy loves him too
Hell what could I do?

I know youíll be angry
But screw you! It was your choice
To go away fighting for paltry pay
Sorry, sorry, didnít mean to get mad
Must be the guilt
Iím not the type to jilt
At the drop of a hat, stuff like that
Anyway I gotta go
Just thought Iíd let you know
Youíll always be in my heart

Be lucky,
Lucy
He drops the letter to the wind
Watches it blow
Then pulls the trigger with his toe
Written by blocat
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