deepundergroundpoetry.com
"21"
I don’t want to drink just cause I’m 21.
I didn’t want to drink when it was placed in my hand.
I don’t want to drink alcohol, I don’t believe in it.
The plans we make--
The words I say--
That’s all they are, my Love, words.
I can’t actually afford for that poison to touch my lips.
And fester. like salt on a sore, as it goes down my throat.
So what if I’m 21, it matters little difference to me.
I have no need to drink demon rum anymore than I did a day ago.
When I was twenty years old.
21, legal to drink.
When I was fifteen I was legal to get a job, I'm too afraid to work in public.
When I was sixteen I was allowed to have a Sweet Sixteen party, I didn’t have enough friends worth inviting.
When I was seventeen I was legal to drive, but I’m too afraid to operate a car.
When I was eighteen I was legal to vote but the line was too long, too many people around.
And the panic attack told me to silently vote this time and next election I’ll try again.
I’m turning 21 but I don’t see the point in drinking.
I never have--
I never did--
It’s like drugs and cigarettes, the meaning and reasoning has to be spelled out to me.
And the reasons have to make sense.
I don’t care if there are no actual health problems that come from smoking weed.
And if drinking responsibly means drinking’s okay.
Or cigarettes don’t hurt anyone but the person smoking them themselves.
Oh surprised I know all the reasons people would say?
Because I’ve heard them all and I have yet to follow the herd.
I gave up on medication that are suppose to fix my mental disorders.
Because I don’t like depending on something to get through living.
Either I live or die, there’s no crutch to stand on.
I don’t need something to hold my hand.
And so no, I will not be drinking after I turn 21.
I will not be ordering a drink.
Because I wouldn’t enjoy it.
That large glass, the bottle in hand.
That just isn’t who I am.
My father drank himself to an early grave.
After pushing me and my mother so very far away.
And before that let’s not forget the times he trashed the house.
Wanting money to go back to the bar.
The divorce that tore my tiny family apart.
The bars I spent my childhood days in.
When I was suppose to tell my mom we went to the park.
My ex-girlfriend would call me up all the time.
Drunk out of her ever-loving mind.
Spouting how she could hear voices in her head.
That she was going to kill herself.
That she didn’t really love me.
And denied knowing me to her friends.
The entire time expecting me to think it was funny and laugh.
My mother started drinking with her boyfriend and his friends.
And there was the day that I fell, hit the ground hard.
And she stood off, only a few feet away.
Not noticing me, her daughter.
Just laughing and drinking the drunken happiness away.
And my friend helped me to my feet and asked if I was okay?
And I replied, mumbled that I was fine
But that memory has yet to leave me since.
And people wonder why I don’t like drinking.
Because they’ve never lived my life.
It was too casual throughout my entire life.
And so I made a silent promise to myself.
That I would never drink, not for me or anyone else.
And I also don’t drive, or socialize.
So there won’t be revised editions of “Someone Should’ve Taught Him”.
The poem about the girl who dies because of drunk driver.
After she was coming home from a party which she choose not to drink at.
Because he parents taught her right.
My parents taught me nothing, I taught myself.
I don’t go to parties.
I don’t drive or own a car.
And I don’t drink because I don’t see the point.
So I will not be drinking when I’m 21.
You can hand it to me, place the drink in my hand.
But it will not touch my lips.
Or burn it’s way down my throat.
I don’t believe in demon rum.
And peer pressure doesn’t work.
I promised a life of temperence.
In memory of my father.
And out of respect for myself.
I didn’t want to drink when it was placed in my hand.
I don’t want to drink alcohol, I don’t believe in it.
The plans we make--
The words I say--
That’s all they are, my Love, words.
I can’t actually afford for that poison to touch my lips.
And fester. like salt on a sore, as it goes down my throat.
So what if I’m 21, it matters little difference to me.
I have no need to drink demon rum anymore than I did a day ago.
When I was twenty years old.
21, legal to drink.
When I was fifteen I was legal to get a job, I'm too afraid to work in public.
When I was sixteen I was allowed to have a Sweet Sixteen party, I didn’t have enough friends worth inviting.
When I was seventeen I was legal to drive, but I’m too afraid to operate a car.
When I was eighteen I was legal to vote but the line was too long, too many people around.
And the panic attack told me to silently vote this time and next election I’ll try again.
I’m turning 21 but I don’t see the point in drinking.
I never have--
I never did--
It’s like drugs and cigarettes, the meaning and reasoning has to be spelled out to me.
And the reasons have to make sense.
I don’t care if there are no actual health problems that come from smoking weed.
And if drinking responsibly means drinking’s okay.
Or cigarettes don’t hurt anyone but the person smoking them themselves.
Oh surprised I know all the reasons people would say?
Because I’ve heard them all and I have yet to follow the herd.
I gave up on medication that are suppose to fix my mental disorders.
Because I don’t like depending on something to get through living.
Either I live or die, there’s no crutch to stand on.
I don’t need something to hold my hand.
And so no, I will not be drinking after I turn 21.
I will not be ordering a drink.
Because I wouldn’t enjoy it.
That large glass, the bottle in hand.
That just isn’t who I am.
My father drank himself to an early grave.
After pushing me and my mother so very far away.
And before that let’s not forget the times he trashed the house.
Wanting money to go back to the bar.
The divorce that tore my tiny family apart.
The bars I spent my childhood days in.
When I was suppose to tell my mom we went to the park.
My ex-girlfriend would call me up all the time.
Drunk out of her ever-loving mind.
Spouting how she could hear voices in her head.
That she was going to kill herself.
That she didn’t really love me.
And denied knowing me to her friends.
The entire time expecting me to think it was funny and laugh.
My mother started drinking with her boyfriend and his friends.
And there was the day that I fell, hit the ground hard.
And she stood off, only a few feet away.
Not noticing me, her daughter.
Just laughing and drinking the drunken happiness away.
And my friend helped me to my feet and asked if I was okay?
And I replied, mumbled that I was fine
But that memory has yet to leave me since.
And people wonder why I don’t like drinking.
Because they’ve never lived my life.
It was too casual throughout my entire life.
And so I made a silent promise to myself.
That I would never drink, not for me or anyone else.
And I also don’t drive, or socialize.
So there won’t be revised editions of “Someone Should’ve Taught Him”.
The poem about the girl who dies because of drunk driver.
After she was coming home from a party which she choose not to drink at.
Because he parents taught her right.
My parents taught me nothing, I taught myself.
I don’t go to parties.
I don’t drive or own a car.
And I don’t drink because I don’t see the point.
So I will not be drinking when I’m 21.
You can hand it to me, place the drink in my hand.
But it will not touch my lips.
Or burn it’s way down my throat.
I don’t believe in demon rum.
And peer pressure doesn’t work.
I promised a life of temperence.
In memory of my father.
And out of respect for myself.
Published 26th Nov 2014
| Edited 28th Nov 2014
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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26th Nov 2014 11:06am
26th Nov 2014 11:10am
26th Nov 2014 12:18pm
Hold that spirit girl!
But all the same,don't be lock people out,you just have to choose your friends and not let them choose you,that way,you control who influence you and the kind of influence they bring into your life...
But all the same,don't be lock people out,you just have to choose your friends and not let them choose you,that way,you control who influence you and the kind of influence they bring into your life...
28th Nov 2014 9:47am
I know, I have no one in my life that would force drinking on me and even if I did, I just wouldn't hang out with them when they're drinking. I had friends that would go out drinking before and I just never saw the point of it.
And I still don't.
- Paige Rider
And I still don't.
- Paige Rider
26th Nov 2014 10:34pm
28th Nov 2014 9:47am
