yet more poems to past loves

1.  
I  take comfort
that during the universe’s
Creation
We were one.
We were so close.
and  I’m sure  
but not certain
that those parts
of yours which
were once part of me
look to the stars
with the sigh
of remembrance.


( To  R.C.)
I saw you
And a residue
of recollection
Triggered.
You smiled each time I passed
Until we finally said “ Hi ” .
Embarrassed for you
I crossed the room
Like a comet entering your orbit
Sheltered by it
By the closing of space .
Close to your body
Humbled  as if you were sacred
How easily word broke from your lips
Trickled like a brooke
Bubbling and sparkling .
I was caught
Pleasantly
By surprise
When our lips
met .
your eyes promised  nirvana.
the gates to the city of life
closed.
in shutting
no misery could enter
in.
But like comets
or orbiting bodies
we gravitated apart.
your voice only coming to me
in waves
of distant sound .
You told me you felt
Like the titanic
 Pulled off course
Bound for the iceberg.
I felt like Sisyphus.
Oh Unjust life !
Like a thief
my most precious gift
was stolen ..
Like a mirage
I looked away
Looked back
and  it was gone!!
***


(to  S >
Like  a valuable  painting
A da Vinci of the  mind
Like a vase
Smashed
  shattered ----
What we had is
Now spoilt
Disturbed and so
ruined.
Like the wilderness
Now  a  tourist destination.
I sense what has been lost
and know
It  cannot return . . .



(to   S.S. >
Humbled in your presence
You like a Greek  goddess
We walked the streets
You ,  I
And my first love
together.
The last night of April
stood on the hill with fire
hope in our hearts
if eyes are windows
ours were wide open.
but too wide
lets the cold breeze in
warmth  leaves
and rain enters.


(To  The April love ? >
In this city
Of thousands
I doubt there could be
One
such as you
again .
we met
in the freshness of spring
Innocent and free
Spontaneous
Untroubled
Like a new born.
In a queue I queried
“what is this”
You asked the situation or life
I wasn’t sure then
and  still am not now.
you said I spoke to myself
in the solitude of the bathroom .
you were self-conscious of your  privilege .
In the room where I wish I held you
We shared memories and philosophies
reading  and  quoting Khalil Gibran to me
I picked from your shelf
And Quoted Lao Tzu to you.
By the crags
in view of parliament  
we talked the big stuff
ideals goals
our history
our politics    
you listened
with gentle  interest.
you questioned
with the curiosity
that fuels my fire
likewise.  
Profound understanding
mutual respect
the smile to eclipse an ugly world.
In the raindrops of
Despair
I walked
Knowing
Happiness
Floats off
Like clouds.
Late we met
On the hill
(Weirdly
By the Parthenon
Imitation
Dedicated to Athena
“  Wisdom is a women “
 Wisdom is THE women )
For the rite of spring
Before international
workers day.
Now no longer
Like newborns
We trembled
and preened
Our speech
Like terrified
birds.
and like waking
from a  dream
with unease
the dawning senses of disharmony ---  
we woke,
startled
and disappointed .

***

I hope you never learn
But I’m sure
you’d guess
I sat at the bus stop
and  cried
my heart
Out
and  am
since
Scratched
Both
Day
And night
by demons
of tyrannical
nostalgia

(00.)
My unwillingness
To full stop
Us
Is just how far
I’M willing
To lie to myself
That the possibility
Still
Exists!..