capsule

 I heard 300 songs      
which were 3 minuets long      
then six days later      
   My memories were gone      
Just some spotless thoughts      
of how the future might be      
If I walked away        
from the former me      
So, I hit rewind & ran away      
to try & find        
              my yesterdays      
     
  That was then & this is now      
Still I live        
        in a thoughtless cloud      
I can't remember the past      
& every time that I try      
   My brain takes a break      
until a part of me dies      
 
            No imagination for me      
                      or      
                Games of fantasy      
            When even my dreams      
                   are scene in 3-D      
       
 
"Living the dream"  
until I moved back home      
Now,        
    It seems like I'm sleeping      
not to feel so alone      
All the souls I used to play with      
are just ghost's in the machine      
 A virus I must deal with      
while I wipe the slate clean      
       
             In a rush to get away        
                    &      
            find my former self      
               So desperate to improve      
          my state of mental health      
       
Now,      
   I'm one hit away      
Wondering:  When will it come?      
As I swim through this grey      
         In search of the Sun      
Holding my breath      
in this cold~unending      
So desperate to break-thru      
& give up pretending      
cause;      
    I'm tiered of kicking      
& waving my arms      
with nothing left in me      
to sound the alarm      
S.O.S. couldn't reach me      
          &      
   Charity won't help      
cause;      
No one can hear you      
when you're all by  
                   yourself      
       
           Screaming under water      
                 Crying in the rain      
           I've been out for so long      
                 I'm in need of restraint...