life beat me

I thought self harm was over I finally won the fight,
For once all can be proud for me doing some thing right,
But no I'm here again watching the blade rip through my skin,
Overpowered by the need to see the blood within,
The cuts don't give me pain I don't feel like its wrong,
Tonight I take the blade that iv needed for so long,
Soaked in my own blood tears run down my cheek,
I walk to clean it of on legs that feel so weak,
Alone I sit and cry can't take this fight each day,
Depression knows im easy and will take my life away,
I don't have one to turn to no longer have my best mate,
No one to pick me up from this crucial lonely state,
I wish I could explain and make some one understand,
Least then I may have some one willing to offer a helping hand,
I'm drained and have no strength there's one way that makes me cry,
I'm a 23 year old victim that tonight will sadly die...