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Understanding men

Umm
Dangerous Mind
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feel free to ask me anything concerning your relationship with a man. like, but not only pertaining to questions such as: what does it mean when a guy stares at you but doesn't talk to you? what does it mean when a guy stares at you with a serious face? what does it mean when a guy stares at you from a distance? what does it mean when a guy stares at you and smiles? what does it mean when a guy stares at you but doesn't smile? ..what does it mean when a guy stares at you without smiling? & what does it mean when a guy stares at you from across the room?

+ many more.

you're welcome

Viddax
Lord Viddax
Guardian of Shadows
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Joined 10th Oct 2009
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Err.... what? Are you seriously peddling a magical understanding of all men? Something which seems either too vague in its application or something that devalues the relationship between other people. - If they have to ask what such and such means, every time, then surely they do not have a connection.

Plus the examples, are pre-relationship surely? Receiving a stare does not start a relationship. Or have such things changed with the new youth of today!?

Put simply I do not understand why this thread is here and what it exactly hopes to achieve. I have a few theories and ideas but I have rambled enough already.

poet Anonymous

Pinky2 Leave her alone what do you know what she is getting. :)

case28
Alexander Case
Dangerous Mind
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Joined 16th June 2013
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Umm said:what does it mean when a guy stares at you but doesn't talk to you? what does it mean when a guy stares at you with a serious face? what does it mean when a guy stares at you from a distance? what does it mean when a guy stares at you and smiles? what does it mean when a guy stares at you but doesn't smile? ..what does it mean when a guy stares at you without smiling? & what does it mean when a guy stares at you from across the room?

There's two words that can answer all these perplexing questions, and perhaps, reveal the greatest all time secret men have kept from women, until now... x-ray vision!

Yep, that's right, those powerfully deep and breathtaking stares men give women, that are so often mistaken for braindead blank looks of boredom, that's really just men focusing extremely hard until they've literally undressed you with their eyes.

So there you have it, ladies. Men really are way more complicated than they appear.

hemihead
hemi
Dangerous Mind
New Zealand 13awards
Joined 1st Nov 2010
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Seems pretty much like they all start with "what does it mean if a man stares at you....."

I'll ask a few then.

What does it mean if a man stares at you;

- through a rifle scope
- from space
- with no clothes on
- with shit on his upper thighs
- with cloudy piss and a missing arm

Fuck yeah...this ought to really clear things up for a lot of people...

Magdalena
Spartalena
Tyrant of Words
Wales 62awards
Joined 21st Apr 2012
Forum Posts: 2993

Sounds like trick questions to me.  A kick in the shin should sort him out, it's rude to stare, especially if I'm not in the mood for a staring contest.

MadameLavender
Guardian of Shadows
United States 86awards
Joined 17th Feb 2013
Forum Posts: 5594

case28 said:

There's two words that can answer all these perplexing questions, and perhaps, reveal the greatest all time secret men have kept from women, until now... x-ray vision!

Yep, that's right, those powerfully deep and breathtaking stares men give women, that are so often mistaken for braindead blank looks of boredom, that's really just men focusing extremely hard until they've literally undressed you with their eyes.

So there you have it, ladies. Men really are way more complicated than they appear
.


Tell me about it--I just spent the last 25 years of my life, married to a closeted gay man....I guess he wasn't staring at me after all. ....(sort of a bit gun-shy, now.....)

Jade-Pandora
jade tiger
Tyrant of Words
United States 154awards
Joined 9th Nov 2015
Forum Posts: 5134

Well...

I've thought about it and here's my conclusion, short and sweet, and no disrespect to host or anyone of any gender intended:

Left brain - Right brain

I don't want to understand men,
I haven't a thing against them.
I don't have the energy 'cause
it's case-by-case then when I pause
to know one beyond a handshake.  

I don't expect any of them
to "understand" me, all as men.
No worries, no pressure, not one,
just go with the flow and have fun.
We're all works in progress you know.

There.  That didn't hurt.  Told you.😇

Solomon_Song
Tyrant of Words
United Kingdom 103awards
Joined 28th Sep 2012
Forum Posts: 331

Thought up this rhyming question, having already seen the replies, flirting with evolutionary theory:

What does it mean when a guy stares at you,
But the clothes you are wearing aren't see-through?
Is it just simple curiousity,
Or just asking himself, "Is she for me?"
Is it hangover from the Stone Age late,
Of sizing up a potential mate -
Or case of the wolf gearing to attack,
With the goal of getting you on your back?

Umm
Dangerous Mind
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Joined 6th Dec 2015
Forum Posts: 2373

Viddax said:Err.... what? Are you seriously peddling a magical understanding of all men? Something which seems either too vague in its application or something that devalues the relationship between other people. - If they have to ask what such and such means, every time, then surely they do not have a connection.

Plus the examples, are pre-relationship surely? Receiving a stare does not start a relationship. Or have such things changed with the new youth of today!?

Put simply I do not understand why this thread is here and what it exactly hopes to achieve. I have a few theories and ideas but I have rambled enough already.


magical is a strong word.. and your point about my first set of examples concerning only pre-relationships is not pointy enough, staring can happen pre, post and during a relationship. not to mention those were only /some/ of the examples.

more example questions: what does it mean if a guy says i miss you? what does it mean if a guy says i like you? what does it mean if a guy says i need you? what does it mean if a guy says i hate you? what does it mean if a guy says i love you? and what does it mean if a guy says i don't know?)

hemihead said:Seems pretty much like they all start with "what does it mean if a man stares at you....."

I'll ask a few then.

What does it mean if a man stares at you;

- through a rifle scope
- from space
- with no clothes on
- with shit on his upper thighs
- with cloudy piss and a missing arm

Fuck yeah...this ought to really clear things up for a lot of people...


Glad you asked!

Soloman's above poem sort-of/kind-of already addressed this a bit..but anyway, a lot of the male on male human interactions are typically dominance displays, especially so in the contexts you described, the best course of action would be to pee on his things, + don't forget the importance of eye contact.

hope this helps with your situation, you're welcome.

Umm
Dangerous Mind
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Joined 6th Dec 2015
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If anyone has any other questions feel free to ask.( Solomon, it seems you answered your own question)

bit more about dominance displays: "Dominance displays occur when a male (or female) is attempting to intimidate a subordinate or to gain rank. A typical dominance display begins with the chimpanzee standing up straight with hair bristling (pilo-erection), shoulders hunched, and a compressed lips face so that his body looks larger and his face meaner. The displaying chimpanzee will start to sway back and forth, shoving brush and other vegetation out of the way with exaggerated movements. The excited chimpanzee may also hurl large rocks, tear off tree branches and drag them while running rapidly down a hill or toward a screaming potential victim. The cowering, subordinate chimpanzee may choose to use one of many forms of submissive behavior to pacify the angry aggressor. While dominance displays don't usually erupt into full scale fighting, those chimpanzees that don't get out of the way fast enough are likely to be slapped."

anonymouslyhere
Pariah Shadow
Dangerous Mind
United States 5awards
Joined 31st Oct 2013
Forum Posts: 1633

I cannot answer for any other man beings as I am not a typical guy (I'm not a typical human period) but if I stare at a girl, it is because I find her pretty and I want to say something to her, but I'm a cowardly bastard so I just stare, smile, and walk away and regret not saying anything.

Astyanax
Ceejay
Fire of Insight
United Kingdom 9awards
Joined 23rd Feb 2010
Forum Posts: 748

Questions about 'Men', as though all men are a single entity, are as pointless as similar questions about 'Women'. They are all human beings, and as such they encompass such an infinite variety of types, cultures, individuals, customs, behaviours, etc, that there is simply no answer to questions which assume that 'Men' or 'Women' are homogeneous groups. The only answer I can suggest to your list of questions about what it means when men look at you in a particular way which you find unpleasant or unsettling is that perhaps you're frequenting the wrong bars.

case28
Alexander Case
Dangerous Mind
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Joined 16th June 2013
Forum Posts: 2077

Umm said:If anyone has any other questions feel free to ask.( Solomon, it seems you answered your own question)

bit more about dominance displays: "Dominance displays occur when a male (or female) is attempting to intimidate a subordinate or to gain rank. A typical dominance display begins with the chimpanzee standing up straight with hair bristling (pilo-erection), shoulders hunched, and a compressed lips face so that his body looks larger and his face meaner. The displaying chimpanzee will start to sway back and forth, shoving brush and other vegetation out of the way with exaggerated movements. The excited chimpanzee may also hurl large rocks, tear off tree branches and drag them while running rapidly down a hill or toward a screaming potential victim. The cowering, subordinate chimpanzee may choose to use one of many forms of submissive behavior to pacify the angry aggressor. While dominance displays don't usually erupt into full scale fighting, those chimpanzees that don't get out of the way fast enough are likely to be slapped."


Umm, interesting stuff. At the moment I'm reading a book called Meditations on Violence. This predominantly male display of dominance you describe is technically referred to by the author as the "Monkey Dance". The ritual commences with a war cry from both alpha males, that sounds something like... "WHATDAFUCKYOULOOKINAT!?!"

Umm
Dangerous Mind
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Joined 6th Dec 2015
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Ah, a man with impeccable taste in books, and that's actually a real book!.. at first I thought you were just being funny.

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