Bodily Harm
The physical pain helps take the person's mind off things mentally. I've never sliced my skin a few times I thought of it. Sometimes things become too much I'd feel like everything was out of control, that there was nothing to hold on to my thoughts would be racing I couldn't focus on none of them. Instead i'd dig my nails into my arms and hand, i'd claw at my arms focusing on that instead of my thoughts.
I dabbled with self harming when I was a teenager (some 15 years ago). I was going through the blindingly angry stage of puberty, and I did enjoy it at the time but not enough to keep me doing it. I didn't do it for attention because nobody knew about it. I did it because it felt cathartic. Again though, the rewards were not enough to keep me wanting to do it.
Recently I have needed a similar conduit for my frustration and aggression and I have found it in physical exercise. A proper good workout hurts like crazy but it drains every last drop of tension and anger from my body. Im not suggesting that my method is for everyone but just to highlight that there are other ways.
Recently I have needed a similar conduit for my frustration and aggression and I have found it in physical exercise. A proper good workout hurts like crazy but it drains every last drop of tension and anger from my body. Im not suggesting that my method is for everyone but just to highlight that there are other ways.
snugglebuck said:At the risk of sounding insensitive, which I'm not, 'is body mortification a way to release pain, or can it be, at times a way to seek attention?"
I'm not passing judgment. I've seriously asked myself this question, and I've as of yet been able to come up with an answer.
Also, by wondering, if this is an attentions seeking mechanism, I'm not implying that it shouldn't be taken seriously. As we all need attention from friends, family, and 'yes'; lovers.
"Could this be an act of loneliness?" Your thoughts please.
Just saying this because it kind of annoys me, I know I personally injured myself because I was pissed off...
sounds completely idiotic but in all honesty it was punch holes in my wall, burn cigarettes on my arm, chop that same arm up, and finally drink all the whiskey I could find and pass out...
it wasn't some loneliness or some self hatred... I just was so fucking angry...I did not want attention,(the attention from my landlord was worse enough...
...)now I can't even get a job, I seriously doubt most people do it for attention, it's more of a damn I'm really emotionally fucked up right now... and honestly who thinks of a tomorrow when each and everyday is just awful?... might just be me but I spent most of my time in my nice fantasy world. Now I'm like, damn, mothers don't even want me to babysit, and schools tell me to cover up...My body is too disgusting for children to see, kind of awful, I want kids!...
... guess you could say for me it was a sort of "fuck off" to the world...
I'm not passing judgment. I've seriously asked myself this question, and I've as of yet been able to come up with an answer.
Also, by wondering, if this is an attentions seeking mechanism, I'm not implying that it shouldn't be taken seriously. As we all need attention from friends, family, and 'yes'; lovers.
"Could this be an act of loneliness?" Your thoughts please.
Just saying this because it kind of annoys me, I know I personally injured myself because I was pissed off...
sounds completely idiotic but in all honesty it was punch holes in my wall, burn cigarettes on my arm, chop that same arm up, and finally drink all the whiskey I could find and pass out...
it wasn't some loneliness or some self hatred... I just was so fucking angry...I did not want attention,(the attention from my landlord was worse enough...
...)now I can't even get a job, I seriously doubt most people do it for attention, it's more of a damn I'm really emotionally fucked up right now... and honestly who thinks of a tomorrow when each and everyday is just awful?... might just be me but I spent most of my time in my nice fantasy world. Now I'm like, damn, mothers don't even want me to babysit, and schools tell me to cover up...My body is too disgusting for children to see, kind of awful, I want kids!... ... guess you could say for me it was a sort of "fuck off" to the world...
Anonymous
test
Been there done that, it's not a pretty thing. But it a fascinating this in some other ways, it can be very symbolic, for example:
I was raised in a religiously oppressive environment where I couldn't express my dislike, or differing beliefs and so I turned to self injury. I carved an upside cross on each arm and carved the word HELL into my arms. Another girl I know with a similar background also carves crosses into herself.
It can be a way of self expression, but it's not a good one....
I was raised in a religiously oppressive environment where I couldn't express my dislike, or differing beliefs and so I turned to self injury. I carved an upside cross on each arm and carved the word HELL into my arms. Another girl I know with a similar background also carves crosses into herself.
It can be a way of self expression, but it's not a good one....
Anonymous
More like self-Deprecation.
I knew a cutter once, long time ago. didn't know 'til I walked in and saw her arms cut. [I probably should have known, all she ever listened to was Dido, and when white flag came on ..well, let's just say if she'd have took up miming for a living] anyhow I'll not lie, my first thoughts were to lighten the occasion by saying "well, if that's your idea of shaving, you might want switch to wax" ..but I thought better of it.
I cut. It's a form of release and control. When you cut you release all the bad feelings and gain control over life. It clears my head and makes me feel better. I find that most people don't understand why others cut. They think it is for attention and things like that. But for a true cutter it is about an emotional realese. It makes you feel better. The sting of a knife against my skin is the most wonderful sensation I have ever experienced. I love it. My knife is a safe haven for me. When things get bad it is my best friend. The pain is my savior.
The last time I cut myself, I went to the hospital. Ambulance rides are NOT as fun as I was led to believe. Turns out that since I had a history with self-mutilation and suicide, I had to be committed. I was on a psych ward for 24 days through Christmas in 2009. I'm 24 now. This was almost five years ago. Never again will I revert back to that state ov mind, but I'll never forget the pure bliss I felt when I broke through my skin.
"I'll never know if it was worth the pain, but I still loved it more than anything in the world. It was my life." - Kali Sikaran
That quote will stay with me for the rest ov my life when I think back on the errors I've made against myself. And it holds truth to my past. I believe it holds truth to everybody's past when cutting is involved. We wouldn't have done it if we didn't enjoy it.
"I'll never know if it was worth the pain, but I still loved it more than anything in the world. It was my life." - Kali Sikaran
That quote will stay with me for the rest ov my life when I think back on the errors I've made against myself. And it holds truth to my past. I believe it holds truth to everybody's past when cutting is involved. We wouldn't have done it if we didn't enjoy it.
