Poetry competition CLOSED 1st July 2015 3:24am
WINNER
Anonymous
rosette
RUNNERS-UP: RevolutionAL and MadameLavender

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Observations of Bullshit

poet Anonymous

"Please, postal worker"


Wait, oh yes wait a minute postal worker
Wait, wait you mail carrier

Mister postman look and see
Are there Express Scripts in your bag for me?
I been waiting o’er a week this time
You’ve got my meds; Tracking shows so online.

There must be some pills today
and a package from Ebay
Please Mister postman look and see
If there is something besides bills for me.

I been waiting for my muscle relaxers
so painfully
You leave no card to say you tried to deliver
I know you hate when my dog barks,
but soon you’ll feel a bite from me.

Mister carrier, don’t bullshit, get real..
I know you’re lazy from those pills you steal.
You tell the postmaster you’ve got no clue
who was driving the route for you.


So many days you‘ve misfiled my mail
and hid the goods in a unmarked pail
Upon the sort machine your pants will get caught
Then all will see the fancy undies I bought
I’ll bet you’re snatching every trinket I buy
and proba’ly bribing all to turn a blind eye.
The bentyl pills will keep them all happy
while I am paying bills and feeling damn crappy.

You gotta wait a minute wait a minute
stop all the bullshit
wait a minute wait a minute
while I write the feds about it
Go on, you bitch, pop those pain pills of mine
I'll slam your head with metal mailbox this time.



Yes, this is my current, true gripe with the postal service. This is a parody of an old song, but the shit going down is quite serious.

poet Anonymous

There was a coop food store,
a discount outlet, and more
boys were playing guitars on the street
This art gallery festival was really neat

This one day, near the ocean blue
where we went, just me and you
We ate and browsed and looked at the boats
and wondered how the big ships goat over the moats

One couple used a two-person dinghy to get to their sailboat
and shoppers filled their totes
This quaint little Maine town filled with people to the brim
Everyone had tans and tons of leisure vigor and vim

The old abandon railroad tracks
with the original pavement in the boatyard, complete with cracks
As we walked the deck that surrounded the fenced-in docks
I couldn't help feeling like time had stopped all clocks

People walked their dogs and carried fishing poles
as they enjoyed this sunny day with all of their souls
In Maine, switching from winter to summer is quite a contrast
and people tend to forget that the warm days do not last

But on this leisurely day of rest
we were, two friends, enjoying the art fest
and picnicking amidst the manicured lawn
in this touristy town that remains, a gem from a time gone


poet Anonymous

Thanks guys/gals for all your "bullshit".

Miss Sub, I love coffee, so your poem gave it that special kick!  So Congrats!

MadameLavender, enjoyed the "isms", and Alistair, where I'm from, "Drive" is included below the Streets and the Lanes - so I feel you!

poet Anonymous

Haha, glad you loved a bit of caffeine. Congrats to everybody :)

RevolutionAL
Alistair Plint
Dangerous Mind
South Africa 29awards
Joined 24th July 2012
Forum Posts: 1257

Well Done! Missy & Madame

Nice stuff!

Al

PS. Awesome Comp Devlin, was really good fun, thanks a million

-x-

MadameLavender
Guardian of Shadows
United States 86awards
Joined 17th Feb 2013
Forum Posts: 5594

Congrats all around and thanks for the nod! Great comp to blow off steam an vent!

Viddax
Lord Viddax
Guardian of Shadows
United Kingdom 31awards
Joined 10th Oct 2009
Forum Posts: 6672

Well that was certainly deserved! Congratulations Missy, and well done Madame.
Could do this again sometime, certainly enough bullshit in the world for at least another competition.
Now who's up for a cuppa?


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