Poetry competition CLOSED 25th September 2014 7:07pm
WINNER
Anonymous
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A Day In The Life Of An Internet Troll

MadameLavender
Guardian of Shadows
United States 86awards
Joined 17th Feb 2013
Forum Posts: 5594

Poetry Contest

We've all been touched by a trolls and uber-jerks at times online.....
So how do you think internet trolls, spend their day?  Do they plan their hateful activities with an agenda-style list, or do they wing-it and make it up as they go?  When they're not online, what do you think they do?

Get inside their heads, and write about how you think they spend their time, live their lives, etc.  Or, pretend that you are a troll and write about how you plan to spend your day.  Sending out spam emails perhaps?  Annoying others in general?  Or even post your drafts of those spam emails and other annoyances you've conjured up, for critique and possibly a trophy if you win!

Poems or prose, any style/length, as many entries as you want, no collabs.  Go!  Have fun, have lots of tongue-in-cheek laughs!

anna_grin
ANNAN
Dangerous Mind
15awards
Joined 24th Mar 2013
Forum Posts: 3367

we eat research chemicals and wank to punk rock then we go out to scam drinks and then we cry in the shower

poet Anonymous

<< post removed >>
MadameLavender
Guardian of Shadows
United States 86awards
Joined 17th Feb 2013
Forum Posts: 5594

Thanks for starting, guys!

poet Anonymous

Troll Roll

I don’t need to introduce myself,
I'm the baddest ass you’ve known.
Goblin on the trigger finger aimed,
My fame is fire thrown.
Got more thorns than the crown of Christ
and spit them in the face
Of every one who cries, “GOD here he comes
to curse the human race...”
Make damn sure that all will feel my ill
til they praise me for the pain
Every hound of hell shall laugh
My skill to kill’s insane.

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name
Burning you
Is the nature of my game.

I snuck around with Old Saint Peter’s girl
and claimed he had sex change.
Swiped his photo, pasted on his crotch
a cheshire cat deranged.
I wrote a hot PM to the website mod
“Pepe La Pue loves you true”
All hell’s flowers burst like bombs when she read,
”He says that you stink too.”

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name, oh yeah
Razzing you
is the nature of my game.

I watch with glee
Call you kings all queens
as you rent your rap rags in pain.
Then I shout that you’ve no balls to keep
the bitches entertained.
After all, who has the biggest ball
when your walls come tumbling down?
Nobody wants to be a king
when the gold bells are the clown’s.
Dingy dongs!

Pleased to meet you.
I can’t be restrained.
I'll berate you
til you scream my name.

Woo hoo hoooo
Who hoo hoooo

”Have some courtesy
Have some sympathy, and some taste
Use all your well-learned politesse
Or I'll lay your soul to waste, um yeah”

Who’s rolling stoned? I’m no word thief!

poet Anonymous

Troll lyfe ain't fer me, butt it iz fer sum peeple

Wayke upp at sixx.
Sixx inn da morning.
Nawt nyte.
Boot up da komputer.
Log intew du.
Fynd a forum disskusshun.
Eny disskusshun.
Enter da disskusshun.
Act nyce at furst.
Den caw a few peeple bad naymez.
Aggravate peeple with stewpid komments.
Threatin peeple.
Dew awl dat b4 noone.
Tayke a brake fer lunch.
Den dew itt awl over agin undtill five.
Tayke a brake fer dinner.
Dew itt awl over agin undtill mydnyte.
Deeboot da komputer.
Tayke a brake tew sleep.
Wayke up at sixx.
Dew awl dat sheet over agin.
Dew itt evry day.
Dew itt during da holidaze tew.
Ramadan tew.
End Christmas.


poet Anonymous

<< post removed >>
MadameLavender
Guardian of Shadows
United States 86awards
Joined 17th Feb 2013
Forum Posts: 5594

Great entries, everyone!

Waterviolet
Fire of Insight
Canada 4awards
Joined 14th Mar 2014
Forum Posts: 628

Wow switch blade thats awesome and also
Holly dove u are ah2 arent you ?

poet Anonymous

Waterviolet said:Wow switch blade thats awesome and also
Holly dove u are ah2 arent you ?


"...I am someone you'll never know
I am the little Neutrino."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yk0Is8-gGSQ

Those Klaatu lyrics are awesome.

Waterviolet
Fire of Insight
Canada 4awards
Joined 14th Mar 2014
Forum Posts: 628

Well i feel bad for you having to hide that part of yourself until u cant hold it in anymore
So you haveto open another profile so that your friends dont look down on you
Quite sad actually

poet Anonymous

You're wrong about the reasons for why I and other people open multiple profiles.
Yep... you're sadly assuming.


MadameLavender
Guardian of Shadows
United States 86awards
Joined 17th Feb 2013
Forum Posts: 5594

Waterviolet, this is a competition, so if you have an entry for it, please do add it so you can be considered for the trophy/win.  If not, then let's keep the chit-chat for the discussion forums and/or PM.

Thanks!  :)

dartford
Paul S...
Tyrant of Words
United Kingdom 29awards
Joined 13th June 2013
Forum Posts: 249

I haven't got a good word for
'anyone', which is really disappointing,
because I don't like 'anyone', but I
don't know how else to put it...

snugglebuck
Dangerous Mind
United States 77awards
Joined 3rd Feb 2014
Forum Posts: 1873

Forgive me Madame Lavender, the following submission is not to be taken seriously.  I made up, and keep it stored to post as a response to any Foxalcoholic that trolls me.  Just thought I'd share it with the rest of the class, though doubt many are old enough to remember the theme song.

To the theme of Rawhide!

Trollin’ Trollin’ Trollin’
Keep those questions going
Though they're just inflame’n
Keep them A Holes movin', They-lie!
Don't try to enlighten
Just make everyone fright’n ,
Soon we'll have Hillary Clinton
And she’ll be preside’n
In the White she’ll be waiting. To tan Boehner’s hide.

Keep it up, piss’em off
Set her up, write her in
Reve em up, turn 'em out
Make’m mad, Register em’
Demo-crat… Landslide!

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