saddest poem

If enough fall
Can tears create an ocean
If enough are moved
Then will we see emotion

And if enough show
That they have all been hurt
Can we all agree
To help this world that barely works

Enough have been scarred
Enough have been bruised
And too many have been
Pushed aside, ignored and used

Can't stay quiet anymore
Rise up from under their thumb
I want to finally feel
What its like not to be numb

Without the aid of the steel
Without the brute force of fist
I want to feel something
Besides this dull ache in my wrist

Enough have been scarred
Enough have been bruised
And too many have been
Pushed aside, ignored and used
Pushed aside, put down and abused

It's an everyday struggle trying to survive in this game
Frequent trials and tribulations can drive you insane
Road gets so bumpy at times that you want to change lanes
Since January 26, 2014, nothing for me has been the same
So many days I just want to throw in the towel and give up
I won't allow that to happen and go out like a chump
At the crossroads of my life but neither route looks good
Having to set a good example for my kids is understood
Not sure what happiness is anymore cause it's evading me
All I know is that I have to provide for my son and young lady
Me checking out this physical residence would devastate them both
So I keep Soldiering on even when I start feeling like there's little hope
Observing this world and how it all seems to be going to hell
Trying to remain positive and uplifting but I'm not doing well
Every corner that I turn it feels like I'm about to crash and burn
It could be worse but better days are for which I constantly yearn
Maintaining a loving and caring heart is becoming a challenge
Especially when everyday the media displays more and more violence
My spirit is weak and not even sure anymore what I want out of life
Mother dying, pain I can't deny and marital problems with my wife
Accumulation of bills the size of molehills and the thrill is gone
Should be a blues or country singer cause I keep singing these sad songs
Wife with heart problems along with my mother dying of cancer
With my granny being gone who do I turn to for answers
My father and brother from a Caucasian mother will tell me to pray
Been doing that for years but I never hear the response he say
I believe the creator has given us all we need when we were conceived
So I'll just keep reaching deeper and deeper for strength within me

Now the sun shines,
I haven't felt this way in a long time.

I can't look back right now,
 Or miss you more, or wonder how

The clouds come rolling out,
 when I think about our drought.

I want to be myself,
 but dear I fear, you're still here.

Now the sky rains,
I haven't felt this way since I've been sane.

The drops they touch my skin,
Reminding me where you have been;

The cold embrace upon my face takes me to a dark place,

Covered by overcast,
And something says this rain won't pass.

I want to shine for me,
But the the water keeps reflecting,

The perfect portrait of,
The two of us madly In love.

That was really incredible man. Stay strong!

I Watch

I walk into the room and I see faces everywhere
All different lives, hopes, and dreams
Love, trust, and hate
I see all these faces and only see the one
The one I watched walk away the one I loved and watched walk away with someone else
I look at the faces all around and only see the one
I watch still
She is with another guy, different face, same result
I watch
I watch as she leaves to go nowhere
To leave me and be so close to me all at once
Because I watch
I watch my love, love someone else
I watch and die a little more
I can't move so I just watch and watch
I watch and slowly disappear
I watch and I watch
I love yet I watch
Shes gone again and yet I'm still stuck
Watching her leave again
The faces speak to me, but I only hear her voice
Telling me about her latest boyfriend
I watch my love walk away someone else again
I watch
I watch her make another mistake
I can't move so I just watch
And I watch
I'm gone now, but still I watch
Forever I watch
                                  - James Rybak

Sad eyes and red cheeks
sitting on that windowsill
feels like weeks

What will people think of me
after I am long gone
and finally free

Memories come out as a slur
all once a great memory
now only a blur

Boy what have I done
to be hated this much
life was once fun

A glass of water lays beside me
I grab the pills
and count to three

This is it
I say to myself
I’m scared to admit

But it’s already done now
already swallowed
taken the vow

It’s been a short ride
as I lay here dead
and wide eyed

I lay in the center of my isolated circle,
With a dagger lodged into my chest,
As i gasp my last breathe's a life filled with silence flash before my eye's.
Watching her walk away,
Watching him turn his back,
My blood keeps me warm in this cold sphere, so i dip my hands in it and force my self to say hello but it didnt speak back it just grew cold like the world and my soon to be corps so alone in this circle of space i rest.

You cut into my soul
         why
you want to destroy me
             why
you ripped out my heart
          why


you want perfection don't you?
you want me to break myself to be your angel
but i'm not
             no i'm not an angel
i'm a fallen angel

You crave perfection
You crave a perfect child and if i'm not the one
I end up playing ghost
Now don't I

Maybe because i don't care for god
rather, i care for death and darkness

maybe because i'm just not perfect

"i'll burn all your books and smash your cd player and stereo".

threats..... always with the threats
"selfish"
maybe maybe not
maybe your the selfish one but you blame me instead

push...push...pushing
always pushing for perfection

you  want me to be something i'm not

yell....yell...yelling
rip....rip....ripping
cut.....cut...cutting

maybe death could be my salvation
maybe he could take me out of here
maybe he could breathe life back into this empty shell
maybe just maybe if only he'd claim me

death could be a promise
a song
or a wish
now couldn't it?

you push to break now i'm all broken up
oh look red milk spilling from my wrist
fire burning so bright
what's that heaven or hell
"make your choice"
i crave death yes but i must stay for a small child needs me
"your sister can come"
no she cannot and with that the red milk stops falling
for it is stitched no more red milk

secretly i'll miss it but never again is the promise of death

PUMICE THREAD

The pain is the cure
The dream I'm looking for
The sun's elegy
The pain grows in me  


Emotionless
World as a puppet
But I digress
No power to stop it


These feelings I have
Slowing me down
Just hand me the bag
And watch as I drown  


Something aches today
So I locked it all away
Instead of a trial
I'll live with denial


A feeling like glass
Almost felt my heart
There's no need to ask
I was dead from the start  


Nothing changes
Forgive what I say
My choice is made
It ends today

There is nothing

The world has no color
There is nothing
A wind blows whirling
My fancies, my wishes to the stars

Sometimes I wish I could just disappear
Like fallen leaves - my dust
Scattered in the rain and wind
Somewhere inbetween madness and loneliness

Now all my life is wasted
In this endless universe of stars
There is no point when all I know
Sad yesterday, sad tomorrow
Sad everywhere I go

We only have what we remember
And you were the last dream of my soul
Now just circles and circles of sorrow
Wearing its own deep feeling as a crown

Bars
When i look
though these bars
of your disign
when i feel the sun              
through the window blinds
when i smell fresh air
when you open the door
i bow my head
and cry
a little more

Figment

If we say
nothing
and pretend
we do not see
would our conscious agree
that we should persuade
our morals to believe
it was just a figment
a broken piece
of fear and pain
a child
dragging
her broken batterd body
from the shadows
of a filthy ally
into
the crying rain

The last of us

Does our journey
through the pain and the torture
the rivers of blood
the sacrifices
that we
and our familys
have endured
down through the ages
does it all
end here
has the silent war
that our ancestors fought
so hard
to keep us alive
to bring us back
from the edge
has it all
been in vain

Slowly we are dieing
one by one
while we remain
scattered on this earth
does it all end
here
in this century
the final closeing of the circle
that haunts us
from the past
where greed and ignorance
once again achives
the destruction of our World
where directed chaos
breaks the bones
of our tatterd dreams
to reunite
different colors
different cultures
to reunite
the one tribe
that will bind us
the one tribe
that will set Free
our birth right
the right to be
a Human being

















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